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After a two week trip to California, the thoughts that keep surfacing are how lucky I am to have such amazing friends. I tried to write a column on another topic that I thought would be "more important" to my readers. And then I thought, what is more important than recognizing the power of friendship?
"When we honestly ask ourselves which people in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares."
Henri J.M. Nouwen, Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life
And friendship is also about celebrating.
This trip to CA was prompted by the wedding of a friend's daughter. I have known Susan, the mother of the bride, since kindergarten and the wedding was held at the winery of another longtime friend, Helen. At the reception, we danced and laughed together along with other friends from our youth.
In Santa Barbara, my friend Lily whom I have known since 4th grade was home for Passover and she took me to visit her parents in the house where she grew up. Her mom fed me delicious homemade dishes just like she did when we were kids.
My friend Peggy and I walked along Hendry's Beach and marveled at the pelicans diving for their dinner while dolphins played alongside. We have walked on this beach together in conversation and contemplation since we were in graduate school.
I scheduled book readings in the Bay Area. At the reading in Oakland, people from all parts of my Bay Area past came out on a beautiful Sunday afternoon. And at the San Francisco reading at Lily's home, one guest commented that it was like being at a private literary salon.
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Photos by Kate McDermott, friend since kindergarten
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Many other dear friends hosted me at their homes and transported me places, both physically and in sharing stories from the present and the past.
In some ways this trip was a nostalgia tour, and yet it was much more. It was a reminder of the importance of dear friends in my life. Thank you all!
"We'll be Friends Forever, won't we, Pooh?' asked Piglet.
Even longer,' Pooh answered."
A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
Happy Spring!
Sue
Lagniappe (a little something extra)
Article from The New York Times by Tara Parker-Pope, "What are Friends For? A Longer Life"
Podcast on Greater Good: The Science of a Meaningful Life website, entitled "Do You Have Enough Friends?" with Rona Renner, R.N. & Christine Carter, Ph.D.
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