happy november

friday

november

6

2015

reflection section

dead or alive

I have a question. What's with people constantly whining about their ages? People turn 40, they freak out instead of celebrating. Then 50 rolls around and eee-gads, that's worse! Then look out here comes the big SIX-0!!

People complain that their bodies are falling apart, everything hurts, they're losing memory, feel nervous about attending a class reunion, and the hair on their eyebrows and head (and a few other places) is now gray.

There are SO many jokes circulating about getting older:

"I'm at an age when my back goes out
more than I do."
Phyllis Diller

"I don't plan to grow old gracefully.
I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet."
Rita Rudner

"There is only one cure for gray hair.
It was invented by a Frenchman.
It is called the guillotine."
P.G. Wodehouse

But George Carlin said it the best:

"So far, this is the oldest I've been."

Age is ageless. We all turn one year older as each birthday rolls around. There is nothing to stop that - except death. So why does everyone keep whining about it?

I need to be blunt here ... do you WANT to have another birthday? Or do you want to be DEAD?

My dearest childhood friend Debbie (and

your co-snippeteer) who was in my life for 50 years, died one year ago on November 11th. Today is her birthday. She will not be turning another year older. Today she should have been 57. But she's not. Now she's timeless.

Her life ceased at age 56. Stopped breathing. Cancer killed her. She's dead, pure and simple. I was a year younger than she was, and next year, God willing, I will surpass her age.

A month before her 56th birthday, she said,

"It's just depressing. I'm 55 and I'm dying." Breaks your heart, right? It thoroughly broke mine.

Her last two texts to me on November 10th, 2014, the day before she died, said this: "Liver is shutting down ... there's nothing they can do."

Debbie knew she'd have to leave behind her husband of 35 years, her two gorgeous adult sons, and her grandson. She felt guilty about it; she felt as if she were letting them down. On her deathbed, I whispered in her ear that it was okay to let go, that she wasn't letting anyone down, that they would be alright.

I know my friend. SHE DID NOT WANT TO DIE. She wasn't ready. Debbie wanted more birthdays and to grow old with her husband, Bruce. She would be happy and proud to say today that she was 57! Because that would mean she'd still be living ... in this life. Here. Now. With us.

But she's not. She's dead.

Right. And here we are complaining about getting older. Hmmmmm.

How old would you be

if you didn't know how old you are?

email your brief thoughts here

to share with other snippeteers
(And if you don't want it published,
that's cool, just mention that.
Some emails may be edited down for length.)

don't be dismayed at goodbyes.

a farewell is necessary
before you can meet again.

and meeting again,

after moments or lifetimes,

is certain for those who are friends.

snippeteer backtalk

(about October 30th issue)

"I totally agree with Judgmental Judy. Gobble, Gobble!!"
~ Phyllis I in MD

"Here is what the hostess of the traditional Thanksgiving must do: compromise! You will not find your bliss in a restaurant, so ... Hubby cleans and sets the table with help of kiddies, Mamma Italiano cooks the basics, guests bring side dishes and desserts. Problem solved! Case closed! Nobody cares about perfection, except you. They just want to be together in a comfortable, traditional setting. Relax, enjoy ... and sip additional wine. The day will find its own perfection within the love of family. I promise! Happy Thanksgiving. ♥

~ Geri E in MD

"You are so right. I used to get so sad when my daughter would go back to college, then she graduated and moved to Long Island. At first I was so down in the dumps for weeks after her visit and my life was in limbo waiting to hear from her again. Now, I love when she comes to visit; but when she leaves, I'm a bit sad, melancholy is more the word. But I have to live on, so why not live happily?
(about Thanksgiving) Traditions are great, but they can't rule your lives, especially when those traditions become work instead of joy." ~ Karan A in MD

"Prayer flares ... FOR the family and school community of beloved principal, Fran N in PA, on her passing from cancer. We will miss you! ... FOR Ed P in PA on the recovery from a shoulder operation ... FOR Melanie B's husband's recovery ... FOR Aimee G in PA, mother of three, who lost her husband in a car accident ... FOR Sue M in PA, my friend and fellow teacher, who lost her husband ... and FOR Beverly W in NJ on the loss of her uncle in Florida." ~ Paula W in PA