I was raised in the Church of England. My father was the organist and choirmaster of our parish church and my mother was active in various church clubs. I went to Sunday School every week and from the age of seven was in the choir, which meant attending two services every Sunday and singing at weddings on Saturdays (I have seen more brides walk down the aisle than I care to remember!)

 

I was taught the story of Jesus and celebrated the two most important events in the Christian calendar - Christmas and Easter - every year till I was sixteen. That was when my parents allowed me to decide whether I wanted to stay in the church or not. I left and have not returned. However, many years later, becoming familiar with the theory and practice of Voice Dialogue has given me a new insight into the story that so informed my childhood years.

 

Jesus lived thirty-three years on this planet, but the occasions we celebrate most of all are his birth and his death. What is it that links these two momentous events?

 

He was born in a stable. There was no hospital with doctors and nurses in attendance; no clean bed with white sheets for his mother to lie in; no warm water or towels available to wash and dry him. His parents were not married; Joseph was not even the father; they were on the run and under threat of death from Herod's soldiers; there was no comfort and no safety. It seems to me that symbolically this is as clear a description of being born vulnerable as one can get.

 

The story of Jesus' birth reminds us that our birthright is vulnerability. Take a newborn baby and leave it alone and it will surely die. We are dependent on the adults around us to take care of us - much longer than for any other species. We need attention, approval and affection to survive and thrive. The theory of the Psychology of Selves tells us that our primary selves develop to protect this core vulnerability. They have us behave in ways designed to get our survival needs met in our particular family, society and culture. As these protector selves develop, so our vulnerability often gets buried and forgotten.

 

At his death, was Jesus in the comfort of his own bed in his own home? Were his friends and family by his bedside? Was his doctor close by to relieve his pain? No. He was betrayed, stripped naked and had a crown of thorns pushed onto his head. He was paraded through jeering crowds, hauling a heavy cross on his back. He was nailed up for all to see, with the most vulnerable parts of his body totally exposed. It was a brutal and public death and again symbolically a painfully clear description of dying vulnerable.

 

The story of his death reminds us that our "deathright" is vulnerability. As we age and our bodies start to deteriorate our primary protecting selves cannot handle situations as they once did - our energy and stamina decline, our memory begins to fail us, and our actions slow. This causes our vulnerability to resurface and be felt. We are the only animal on the planet that knows some day we must die. No matter what our belief system may be about death, we have no proof as to what happens to us once we depart. This not knowing can't but prick our vulnerability.

 

    

This 6-day residential retreat is designed for anyone who wishes to renew and deepen their understanding of relationship in a safe and supportive environment. It will help you clarify the basic patterns of your relationships, communicate your needs, hopes and fears in a more open and honest way, and create new choices for how you live, love and interact with others.

 

 

 

The retreat centre, Le Pianore, is located deep in the Southern Tuscan countryside in a largely undiscovered part of this magical region. Situated beneath the breathtaking Monte Giovi (Mount of Jupiter), and surrounded by cypress trees, fields and big skies, it offers a charming and comfortable retreat experience.

• Change old patterns of interaction
• Resolve disagreements and conflicts quickly
• Express yourself more freely in intimate relationships
• Experience relationship as teacher, healer and guide

   

 

Take a look in the side bar for upcoming trainings. Here are more details of two that I'd like to draw to your attention:

A new, updated version of the Voice Dialogue Online Program is now available. It can be easily  accessed anywhere, at any time, enabling you to work through the 7 modules at your own pace. It offers a comprehensive introduction to Voice Dialogue, the Psychology of Selves and the Aware Ego Process.

 

 

The Basic Program includes:

• 7 video presentations focusing on the basic elements of Voice Dialogue
• Preparatory tasks enabling you to get the most out of each presentation
• 56 practical exercises putting the weekly themes into a personal, every day context
• Access to an extensive library of articles, videos, and MP3's covering all aspects of Voice Dialogue
• A monitored message board where themes, issues and questions can be shared and discussed

'Thank you so much for creating this online Voice Dialogue Program.  At first I was a bit sceptical at the thought of doing an online e-learning program of this type but it has exceeded all my expectations and has been absolutely brilliant! I have been involved with Voice Dialogue for a while now and I feel it is a very professional program. In my opinion both newcomers and people with previous experience with Voice Dialogue will benefit a lot from this. I certainly did! I highly recommend this programme! Many thanks John.'

 

Pia Lindgren, Psychosomatic Therapist 

Sydney, Australia

 

'I would recommend this course to anyone who wants to enrich their lives.

When I signed up for this course, I didn't know what to expect. I was having problems with my critic harassing me all the time - I called him my "Demon". Now I have embraced many of my different selves and it has worked wonders for me. I'm grateful to John for what I have learned on the Voice Dialogue Online Program.'

 

Mark Ouellette, self-employed, auto repair business

Peabody, Ma., USA

 

View a video endorsement of the Program  by Drs Hal and Sidra Stone.