Many of you have dedicated a day to driving youth to their old neighborhoods, former foster homes, and other significant places and so this resonates with us as we practice the 3-5-7 Model©.  We recognize the need to understand and clarify life events, integrate the past with the current, understand what happened and explore the impact of past experiences on present circumstances.  It's a journey that we are privileged to observe.

Here's to enjoying the journey!

 To view more about Dr. Burger's work, click here.

 When RESPONDING to our youth and families, we sometimes use a technique referred to as self-disclosure.  We may decide to use self-disclosure to convey understanding, to normalize the feelings of another, or to support the building of rapport and ultimately the strengthening of the relationship.

In an article written by Janine Roberts for Psychotherapy Networker, titled Think Before You Get Personal, the author suggests a set of questions that you can ask yourself to guide the decision to disclose or to not disclose: 

Using self-disclosure about your own feelings and experiences in a manner that facilitates growth in the youth you are working with can be both appropriate and productive as the youth works to understand their own feelings experiences.  Conversely, using self-disclosure in a manner that meets our own need, diverting attention from the youth, can be harmful and counterproductive.  Remember to be mindful of your use of self-disclosure in your work.  Explore your questions about self-disclosure with colleagues and in supervision to be sure your use of this technique is appropriate.

Optimizing Home Visits

This month we'd like to explore a perceived barrier that is often raised-the dilemma of time (or better lack thereof).  We often hear from you that you want to engage youth in 3-5-7 Model© work, but that you feel challenges to find the extra time to accomplish this. 

As described in the Child Welfare League of America's Field Guide to Child Welfare, the purposes and goals of home visits include:

• Providing Children with Opportunities to Talk about Placement and Their Feelings
• Helping Children Develop a Story to Explain the Reasons for Placement
• Helping Children Maintain Continuity and Identity

A worker in rural Nevada recently described to us how she started applying 3-5-7 Model© concepts in her work with a teenage boy who she'd been working with for over a year.  She described how he would often seem anxious to get home visits over with; he gave very short answers to her questions, folded his arms across his chest, and seemed relieved when she would end visits with him.   

After 3-5-7 Model© training, the worker began to shift her practice.  She began by simply reflecting with the youth that she noticed that home visits did not seem to be working very well for the youth.  She explored with the youth that perhaps instead of limiting home visits to the standard questions about school, therapy, etc., that they try doing something different with their time.  He was immediately agreeable.  While initially he expressed it felt awkward, he began to open up to the worker through the use of activities like the Loss Line and Life Map.  This worker now gets answers to questions about therapy appointments and school progress from the resource parent, and spends her time with this young man supporting his Life Book work.  

After only a few home visits, this 15 year old boy is now re-engaging in activities that he previously was interested in, including participating in sports and using art as an outlet.  The worker describes the change in this young man as being as different as "night and day".   

Other ideas to consider:  What issues/concerns do you address during home visits?  Some of these may include:

• School performance/concentration and attention issues
• Discipline concerns
• Foster parent stress
• Challenging behaviors
• Socialization with peers

What are you doing now to address these concerns?  Some tools you may be using likely include reasoning with child, lecturing, and negotiating for positive behaviors.  Using these techniques often seems to fall short and leaves us feeling like we haven't done much to help. 

What if you tired using 3-5-7 Model© concepts to guide the way you approach the concerns that present during your home visits?   

• School performance/concentration and attention issues-recognize the child may be distracted by thoughts of loved ones and fears/anxieties about what may lie ahead, provide validation of feelings and provide as much truthful information as you can about next steps and decisions
• Discipline concerns-refocus the foster parent on providing a safe environment, responding to expressions and building the relationship
• Foster parent stress-encourage parent to recognize the importance of their role; that although it may feel as though little progress is being made their commitment to the youth is the ultimate path to healing
• Challenging behaviors -recognize anger as a stage of loss/grief, recognize the hurt and provide a safe place for the expression of that hurt
• Socialization with peers-engage the youth in activities that explore identify formation and relationship skills

Try it and let us know.   We'd love to hear from you - your success stories and your questions!