I've been on the front lines of a technology war and I feel a little battered. I feel as though the "enemy" has an unfair advantage because the language is in code and the solutions unintelligible to me.

 

It started with one of my domain names going to an old website rather than a new one. That resulted in many emails, and finally an hour "live chat" with a support person at my hosting site. It took me 45 minutes of the hour to get her to talk to me in other than cryptic initials. I finally had to tell her that I was technologically illiterate, and then she started to talking to me like she would her grandmother but that was fine. Most of it was intelligible and gave me enough information to tell my web designer what was up.

 

Then my cable provider kept calling about a new router box that they wanted me to have rather than the one they had originally given me. I get my phones, internet and cable through this magic box, so I finally agreed. It came in a box, and I was horrified to realize that they wanted me to hook this up. That was a two hour phone call with various technicians (the internet and the phones are two different departments, so I had to tell the story in detail twice, and get through the phone system again and again). It ended with me needing to pay a technician to come out, and even he had problems, had to trade out the box once, and was on the phone to his technicians for 1-1/2 hours before it worked.

 

Next, my computer must have felt unloved from all the attention I was giving the other technology, so it started to seriously misbehave. It couldn't get to the start menu one day requiring computer repair person, and then it finally worked. He cleaned up everything he could see that might have caused it. A few weeks later I got the dreaded blue screen right in the middle of my putting together an excel spreadsheet, so I knew it was a race against the clock.

 

Because I don't know geek-speak, exploring the world of new laptops is a mind-altering experience for me. I had my brother tell me exactly what to say, and I went in and ordered it. They said that it would be in the store in three days. One week later, after several phone call attempts, I sat in the store for 1-1/2 hours until they would trace the shipment. It seemingly was somewhere between here and China (honestly, that's what I was told) but they could get me a machine from their other store...in two days.

 

I may not speak geek, but I do know not to keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results. I pulled my order from there and went elsewhere.

I just got my new computer and am forcing my PC brain to think Mac. Dare I say my techno wars are over?  It sure feels good to be 100% functional again.
  

Until next time,

 

sb  

How to Talk With Your Kids About Money
By Susan Bross, Money Coach

You are the financial education that your children will get. What you say, how you behave, what the emotional climate is around money - these are the ways that your kids develop their attitudes and beliefs around money.

 

You might think this is just fine, or instead you may be wishing that someone else could be responsible for this. There is a flurry of talk about teaching financial literacy in the schools, but until that happens, you are the educational tool that your kids need. And have no fear - you CAN do it.

 

This article is about three areas of concern: how to talk about not spending money for something, how to deal with their allowances, and how to use each money experience as a teaching tool.

 

How to Say "No"

Often when parents are saying "no," they add "we can't afford that right now." Children don't really know what to make of that. Wasn't there actually enough money or was there another reason? The take-aways are confusion and an association of not getting that thing they wanted because "we couldn't afford it."

 

"Afford" is such an amorphous word with no specific meaning or dimensions.The confusion also extends to other spending you may be doing...how can Mom get her nails done when we can't afford it? How can Dad buy a new phone when money is so tight?

 

In talking with your kids about whether or not they can "have that thing they want," substituting the word "choice" instead of "afford" will create a more teachable moment. The greatest money lesson that you can give your kids is that money is about choice. If you choose to spend your money over here, it won't be available over there. It all depends on your choices.

 

And think how much more powerful the word "choice" is. It gives the message that you're in charge, that you are mindful of consequences, and that you're the master of your money life. "We're not choosing to spend money in that way right now."

 

How to Talk about Allowances

This is a very provocative topic. There are strong feelings on this subject, so I'm just going to talk about how I view it. Allowances are the medium by which your kids can have hands-on learning about money. You want them to make good decisions and bad decisions with it before they get credit cards in their hands. They can learn delayed gratification and planning ahead through allowances.

 

Because I think that household chores are the responsible actions of someone in community with others, I don't think that allowances should be tied to chores. Refusing or forgetting to do chores is simply a behavior with a consequence, like any other - rather than it being tied to money.

 

I believe that not all of an allowance is for spending, either. Some is for a long-term savings goal (that they can understand, depending on their age) and part is for giving away to those less fortunate. Allowances can start as soon as your child knows how to make change, and as they get older, their allowances need to handle more things...like the gifts for friend's birthdays, school lunch fees, and later on gas for the car and perhaps a quarterly clothing allowance. The use should expand as the abilities expand. The goal is to close the National Bank of Mom and Dad, and end the $20 handouts.

 

They'll need to understand debit cards and electronic banking, so consider paying their allowance through a bank account once they're old enough to interact appropriately. To take away the fear of their spending over their limit, have the overdraft option turned off. Or consider a prepaid card (Paypal for example offers a student account with no fees).

 

At the end of the month, sit down with them and review their spending...what do they remember most about what they spent? Would they spend their money that way again? What would they want to do differently?

 

How to Use Everyday Experiences to Teach About Money

When you're grocery shopping, you can have both a money and a math lesson. For younger ones, have them choose which item to buy if you only wanted to spend a certain amount. Older kids can figure out what items are really a bargain and which ones are not by calculating the unit price. (Hint: Many stores have this right on the shelf so if you're not good at math you can check their answer and then let them in on the secret).

 

Have your child choose a gift for a friend, but give them a limit. When you're out clothes shopping with them, tell them up front how much you intend to spend so that they can keep their choices within that amount.

 

When they are older, you could have them participate in paying bills, opening up the envelopes and reading to you what is due and when. You might also review bills with them so that they know what to look for.

 

You might consider having them pick out a stock they want to buy, and help them purchase it. There are ways to buy partial pieces of stock, or buy one share through Dividend Reinvestment Programs (DRiP) so that the dividends continue to buy more stock. Then they can watch what their stock is doing.

 

Make it fun, make it a game, and you'll be proud of the money savvy kids you have.

 

Just a Starting Point

This is just a start. Part of the challenge around being Money University for your children is that, as the professor, you'll need to set a good example. Teach them what you wish you had learned AND be sure to walk your talk.

 

So let me ask you...Are YOU feeling a little overwhelmed when you think about talking to your kids about money? Or does the prospect of holiday shopping make you feel a little queasy? The good news is there's still plenty of time for planning, and this would be a great time to schedule a no risk, no obligation consultation. Let's take the stress out of talking about money this holiday season. Call, or email me today and let's talk!

 

 

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