|
Open Letter to the Women of God about Modesty
From the very start I want to emphsize that many of God's people do present a proper example. At the Feast site that I attended last year, all the ladies present were excellent examples of elegant and modest appearance; and I have many friends in the Ekklesia who know what God expects in this area and are good role models for me and others.
But Brethren, I have been at church services and attended Feast sites (and I know you have too) where modesty on the part of our women was sorely lacking. And I expect it is mostly because we live in a society where we have become so acclimated to the fashion trends and have come to accept a certain amount of exposure. Most just do not seem to know any better, especially our young girls who have never known any other type of clothing. And as most of us know, to go shopping for clothes anymore in our day and age, it is almost impossible in find modest clothing. But God in His Word is very clear about how women should present themselves and it is the responsibility of the church to teach and to help others to understand what is proper and what God expects of a godly woman.
The fact is, that immodesty has become a huge problem in the Ekklesia and many do not seem to be able to see anything wrong with it. In all probability, most of the problems in the congregations come from thoughtlessly adopting worldly trends and from a lack of understanding by our young ladies of how their lack of modesty affects our young men. But even among the older women, there are a quite a few who are still following the dictates of the latest fashion world rather than presenting a good example of what it means to be modest and serving as proper role models for the younger ladies. And this just should not be.
I remember as a young lady attending church services for the first few times in the days of mini-skirts, platform shoes and tight pant suits. At the very first service I attended, another young lady in her early twenties introduced herself to me and I noticed how attractively she was dressed; she looked very fashionable and yet her clothing was of simple design and was very modest. We quickly became best of friends and she became my role model that I wanted to exemplify in the way I came dressed to services as well.
So ladies, how you dress does make an impact on others! We can either set a proper and good example for others to follow without even saying a word; or we can set a poor example, whereby we encourage others to think that immodest apparel is fine and acceptable.
This is a very sensitive topic, we realize, but this is something we feel that God is very concerned with and He wants His people to overcome in this area along with the other areas that are now beginning to be restored. To be modest in all that we think, say and do is very important in God's eyes and how we dress and the kinds of clothes that we wear is reflective of the degree that we want to glorify Him.
Lust is rampant in our modern day society. And the clothing styles, for males included, but especially female clothing has reached a ridiculous level of immodesty and provocativeness. Even clothes that actually do cover most of the body are still primarily designed to accentuate and highlight the female body. Unfortunately, this manner of dress has crept into the Ekklesia big time. What used to be thought of as only the apparel of prostitutes, is now common place, even to the point of encouraging our little girls to dress in scanty and provocative clothing, thinking it is "cute". I have even seen very young little girls wearing high heels at church services.
In the sermon on the mount, Jesus addresses not only the letter of the law but goes right to the heart of what it is to the keep the commandments in the very spiritual intent as well, starting with what we allow to think about in our minds. In regard to adultery, He speaks of lusting in one's heart and thinking of lustful things as sinful as literally committing the act.
Matthew 5:27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
To encourage women to dress in modest apparel that does not provoke lustful thoughts and desires is not only a Christian's duty, but a Biblical imperative. Paul commands the older women to set proper examples and to teach the younger women how they can be good wives, good mothers; and to be discreet and chaste in all of their conduct.
Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; [teachers of what is good] 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Women who are discreet, chaste and dress modestly, are showing proper agape love to their brethren, and by not dressing in a manner that draws attention to themselves, they are fulfilling God's command to not cause offense. As Christians we are to be filled with the love of Christ and this includes loving our neighbors and our brethren as much as we love ourselves, never wanting to do anything that would harm others.
Mark 12:31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.
Christians ladies must realize that to dress immodestly does have harmful effects on their neighbors and to do so can be a real stumbling block to them especially to the men that are in our assemblies and in our fellowship who are our Christian brothers.
Men will be affected by hormonal and chemical actions beyond their immediate control, and many will have a struggle controlling their thoughts; this amounts to the wearers of un-modest apparel being an easily avoidable and unnecessary stumbling block to many brethren, and sets a bad example in the general public.
The pressure to conform to worldliness may be great, but we are to be conformed to the Word of God and not to worldly practices, either in the assembly or in public.
Romans 13:10 Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.
1st Peter 2:11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul; 12 Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that, whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation.
To love our Christian neighbor, and all our other neighbors whether they are Christian or not, is to do all we can to help them win that war of fleshly lust by the things that we say, how we act and by what we wear while in their presence.
A woman that dresses immodestly, whether knowingly or in ignorance, is aiding the enemy in that war of the flesh, rather than being a helper or a promoter of godliness. We need to be striving to direct all our thoughts and conversation on whatsoever is pure and holy, rather than drawing attention to ourselves by wearing skimpy or provocative clothing.
God's people must not put up stumbling blocks that cause others to trip and fall. If we do, God will hold us accountable for that, just as Paul teaches in Romans 14:13. Women who dress immodesty to provoke lusts in others, will be held accountable for their lack of love and concern for the spiritual well being of their brethren. A woman cannot say "I can dress as I please and if others are offended or tempted, it is their problem and not mine."
Romans 14:13 Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother's way.
To instruct and encourage Christian women to dress modestly is nothing more than to encourage them to express godly love and concern for their brethren. To say that we, as Christians, have no right to speak up if other Christians are dressing in a manner that exposes too much sexuality and that they are causing offense when they appear in public, dressed like sexual teases, is equivalent to saying we have no right to encourage our brothers and sisters to keep God's commandments and to exhort one another to stay on the strait and narrow path.
It is what God says in His Word about modesty; that should be our criterion! Just what does He reveal about how women should view modesty?
A biblical definition must first focus on the heart. Modesty primarily is about what is in our hearts and minds, what is our true motivation. And additionally, to dress modestly is about exercising proper discernment and having a concern and awareness of others and our surroundings.
Paul's Teaching on Modesty
Paul was not afraid to address his concerns about the women under his care and how they should adorn themselves, as he teaches in his letter to Timothy. Paul instructed the younger pastor on how he should instruct the women in his congregations and by extension is a teaching for all of us.
1st Timothy 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Modesty is NOT about trying to look dowdy or unattractive and Paul is not saying that women shouldn't adorn themselves. His statement about this subject is very positive and not negative; he does say, "women should adorn themselves". He is not telling women that they need to dress in a prudish or unattractive style. The same word "adorn" is used to speak of a bride beautifying herself for her husband as we read in Revelation 21.
Revelation 21:2 And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.
The Greek word for adorn is kosmeó (Strong's #2885) and means to adorn, garnish, trim. From kosmos; to put in proper order, i.e. decorate (literally or figuratively); specially, to snuff (a wick) -- adorn, garnish, trim. See GREEK kosmos. (Strong's Exhaustive Concordance)
It is a term that expresses being ornamented, well groomed, and put in order and is a very affirming word. The concern for Paul isn't about whether a woman should adorn her body; but about how she adorns her body.
The context in the letter to Timothy shows that Paul is talking about how women should prepare themselves for appearing in public. He exhorts women to adorn themselves in a way that is fitting and in a way that glorifies God when they appear before Him for worship, or in public as a Christian example. If they "profess godliness" and want to show God honor and reverence; how should they dress?
Paul, in addition to admonishing women to be modest, was also addressing a situation that was a problem among the ladies in his day. In the Greek culture the social elite, and specifically the women of high standing, were known for their flashy and extravagant wardrobes, their elaborate hair styles, and their costly clothing that communicated extraordinary wealth. Paul is instructing the ladies that they should not be trying to imitate the women of the world in how they were adorning themselves. He was basically saying "Dress in a way that shows that you desire that the attention of others be on God, not yourself."
A person's manner of dress, or even their preoccupation with clothing itself, is often indicative of a heart that is more occupied with self, than focused on God.
In 1st Peter, the apostle Peter describes the kind of things that wives (and all women) should be adorned with; these are things that are much more valuable and attractive to God than the most fancy and costly attire.
1st Peter 3:2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
When Paul says that women should wear "modest apparel" he is talking about a term that encompasses not just clothing, but is about one's behavior and attitude, and also about one's demeanor and humility.
When he talks about "good works" he is saying that is ultimately the goal that a woman should be concerned with, and not how physically attractive she looks. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul talks about how we are created in God to do good works, which pertains to both men and women; and to be humble and modest are among the things we should consider as good works.
Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.
In Titus, Paul tells us that Jesus' sacrifice makes it possible to be cleansed from our iniquity and we are to be purified unto Him and to be zealous of good works. Modesty is about good works that we are to be zealous for; and we are not to be overly concerned about the outward appearance, but rather in how be behave, how we communicate and relate to our brethren in all purity.
Titus 2:14 Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a peculiar people, zealous of good works.
When Paul used the term shamefacedness in the verse instructing Timothy about how women should adorn themselves, the word can seem kind of strange to us. But once we understand the true meaning of "shamefacedness" it provides us with even more insight as to what modesty is about. It means that modesty is an attribute that shows sensitivity to sin.
The Greek word for shamefacedness is aidós (Strong's #127) and means: (through the idea of downcast eyes); bashfulness, i.e. (towards men), modesty or (towards God) awe -- reverence, shamefacedness.
In Paul's letter to Timothy, he is saying that a woman's clothing should be worn with shamefacedness; meaning "modesty" or it could be translated: worn in awe toward God and reverence for Him.
Paul is explaining that women should have a demeanor of reverence, showing respect for oneself and a regard for others. In fact modesty is about having self-respect and valuing oneself enough and the body that God has given to us, that we would want to keep it covered and not show areas that would cause embarrassment to ourselves or others.
The word defined as modesty can even carry the connotation of "bashful." The term "shame," that is contained within the meaning of "shamefacedness", implies the idea of sorrow over the sin that is in the world and that as a godly woman we should be very sensitive to that sin, knowing that sin is offensive to God and that it cuts us off from Him. And as a woman of God, she has an awareness of this fact and wants to always have purity in her own heart, (just as a man needs to desire to always have purity in his heart), therefore she would never want to even come close to trying to provoke impurity or lust in others.
A man is responsible for his own lust, but if a woman in his company dresses with the intention to allure him, she too is sinning. God will hold the man accountable for his sins, but He will also hold a woman accountable for provoking that lust by her lack of concern and by her immodest clothing. She is therefore guilty of a lack of shamefacedness, for treating sin lightly and being the instigator, knowing that she is the cause of the sin of others. If we are seeking to obey the whole Word of God, we will be exemplary in modesty by our dress and by our attitude; this is one way we can keep God's commandment to love others and to strive to avoid even the "appearance of evil". A heart of modesty that is motivated by a godly love for one's fellow man is far more important than most of us realize. We must not take the sin of immodesty lightly!
Modesty is About True Freedom
Many in our culture may think of modesty as being repression or restrictive, when really the opposite is true. Modesty is about true freedom. Those that cannot understand about spiritual things may accuse those who speak out against immodestly as being legalistic or trying to impose arbitrary rules that restrict a woman's creativity and self expression. But the real issue of the matter is about wearing respectable clothing with self-control, or in other words having self mastery over one's ego and over a desire for self aggrandizement. This is also a part of what it means to be sound minded and being spiritually mature.
Through the help of God's Holy Spirit we can resist the temptation to incorporate the standards that the world promotes for what a woman should look like and act like; but rather we must seek to have a heart that is full of the fruits of God Spirit, as we have been studying in our previous Newsletter issues. As women of God, do we really want to be just like the women of the world and try to follow their examples of what they think of as attractive, feminine, and womanly?
This world, and Satan's influence as the unseen ruler of this world, has conditioned both men and women to believe immodesty is somehow womanly and sexy, something that we just accept as normal; but in reality immodestly is a kind of slavery. A woman may be enslaved by her desire to be attractive to men or she might define her self-worth by her stylish wardrobe, her sex appeal, latest hair fashions, or fancy brand name clothing that she wears.
This kind of slavery to outward appearances is so pervasive because sin impacts all of us. In today's sexually oriented culture, with Hollywood trend-setting images, many women fall prey to this kind of slavery. But as Christian women we must free ourselves from slavery of any kind of sin including the sin of lewdness, which immodesty is! Why? Because we are united to Christ and we want to be slaves to His righteousness; not slaves to showing off our body. In Romans 6, Paul exhorts us to live out this freedom by yielding our bodies as instruments for righteousness, not as instruments to be used in walking according to the works of the flesh.
Romans 6:14 For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace. 15 What then? shall we sin, because we are not under the law, but under grace? God forbid. 16 Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness? 17 But God be thanked, that ye were the servants of sin, but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine which was delivered you. 18 Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness. 19 I speak after the manner of men because of the infirmity of your flesh: for as ye have yielded your members servants to uncleanness and to iniquity unto iniquity; even so now yield your members servants to righteousness unto holiness. 20 For when ye were the servants of sin, ye were free from righteousness. 21 What fruit had ye then in those things whereof ye are now ashamed? for the end of those things is death. 22 But now being made free from sin, and become servants to God, ye have your fruit unto holiness, and the end everlasting life. 23 For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
God desires for Christian woman to have self-mastery in their wardrobe choices, to be totally free from the worldly ways of defining their value, attractiveness, beauty, and sexiness; not enslaved to a preoccupation with their physical image, and determining their worth by their outward adornment.
Christians Must BE Examples of What They Teach Others
In our present day world, modesty is a very serious issue for the true Christian; the person who desires to be a believer and follower of Jesus Christ in every aspect of life. God tells us to be HOLY for He is Holy and to have a walk that is worthy of our vocation. We can either be a beacon of light showing the world that we have higher standards than the world's standards; or we can appear to them as hypocrites by trying to fit in with the culture's fashions that stress lewd and provocative styles that reveal rather than cover up.
By having our conversation [or conduct] honest, are we willing to be examples of holiness to all those we come in contact with, including unbelievers? To dress inappropriately we can become as hypocrites when we seek to teach others about the gospel and how they should be living according to God's laws; and then dressing in a manner that is contrary to godliness, invoking lust in the hearts of others.
Jesus told His disciples to go into all the nations and preach the gospel, to teach them to observe all the things that He had taught them (Matthew 28:20). In Romans 2:17-29, Paul explains how those who teach, must themselves be everything that they teach others to be. When we call ourselves Christians and say that we are part of His body and then fail to live the Way that we proclaim or the truth that we espouse, then we become hypocrites and we bring blasphemy to the name of Christ and to His cause.
This is why this topic is so very important and is another reason why we must restore modesty to God's church if we ever want to make a witness for God and for His way of righteousness in this very evil and dark world that we live in.
Romans 2:23 Thou that makest thy boast of the law, through breaking the law dishonourest thou God? 24 For the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles through you, as it is written.
True Leaders Must Not Be Silent on This Topic
So we have to ask, why are the leaders mostly silent on this topic and why is immodestly tolerated as we have all witnessed even at Sabbath services and at the Feasts? It seems that some of the ministers, and some of the husbands and dads are not speaking up and not really teaching against this condition in the Ekklesia.
Why is there not much teaching about modesty in the assemblies presently? Could it be that we just don't want to offend, and because it is embarrassing to say something when we encounter someone wearing inappropriate clothing? And are we competing for church members and trying to be so friendly because the priority is to gain new members and add to our numbers? In our attempt to be politically correct in our COGs we tend to see teaching on modesty as highly judgmental. It seems that we have been taught and conditioned that we must not make our brethren or those who are seeking out a congregation or group uncomfortable at our assemblies. Therefore we just tolerate immodestly under the guise of love and acceptance and try to make all feel welcomed even if they are not showing common decency in what they are wearing.
We don't have to be mean spirited or self-righteous when exhorting or teaching what is proper. Scripture is clear on our responsibilities to each other and it shows us how we are to truly love our brothers and sisters.
Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.
We are to teach because we do care, and we want to see brethren overcome and to be in God's Kingdom, just as we want them to teach us when they see us making poor choices and having poor judgment. That is God's way, not just tolerating or putting up with sin; or like the old adage, "going along, to get along". We are to be more willing to please God; rather than to please men or women because we feel we may hurt their feelings. (Galatians 1:10)
Modesty Begins in a Heart That Wants to Please God
As King David wrote so much about in many of his Psalms; that He loved God, that he loved His commandments and he found his delight to do them. He willingly turn his eyes away from the things of vanity; [and anything having to do with lewdness is vanity] and he asked God to quicken him [incline his heart] to go in His path of righteousness [which is the keeping of all of God's commandments in letter and in spirit].
Psalm 119:35 Make me to go in the path of thy commandments; for therein do I delight. 36 Incline my heart unto thy testimonies, and not to covetousness. 37 Turn away mine eyes from beholding vanity; and quicken thou me in thy way.
Modesty starts in the heart. As Christian ladies, we do not need a yardstick or a checklist for modesty. If we have God's Holy Spirit, it will lead us to see, to discern what is appropriate and modest. Just as King David, we can ask God to help us to incline our hearts to desire to live in all His ways.
In past years in the WCG, the leaders may have gone too far by having certain rules and checklists, (and a back and forth rule on makeup) for "length" and certain "coverage". This went so far as having certain hair lengths that were acceptable or not acceptable, and having rules of measurement for hair. Some of the ministers served as hair-length and skirt-length police in the church.
This post is not about church rules and checklists. As mature Christians with the mind of Christ, we should not have to have anyone "dictate exactly what can be worn in terms of style, length and coverage". Fundamentally, this is not a matter of cloth and how much it covers, but one of a right heart. We in all practicality may have everything covered but if our heart is not right, we can be just as guilty as if we were dressed immodestly. Modesty comes from a Godly heart, not a checklist. Even if we were to have rules dictated to us, we could still have the motive behind our rule-keeping by: "how much can I sin, and still be acceptable?". This is the very opposite of what a true Christian should be thinking. We should be asking, "what can I do to bring the most glory to God?".
And when it comes to the issue of modesty and how we dress, this attitude alone is capable of cultivating true modesty in our hearts and we can teach this attitude to our children starting at a young age. Any time we take the approach of "what can I get away with?" our level of what is true modesty will inevitably plummet. People can always find ways around the rules. But when we are dealing with attitudes and motives of a heart that is directed and monitored by following the lead of God's Spirit, rather than following after the works of the flesh, the externals will take care of themselves and conform to what is in our hearts. When we have modesty in our heart, then the external modesty will follow.
We can do a study on the whole chapter of Psalm 119 to learn how David loved God's commandments and how he had a heart tuned to keeping them in all things. By studying God's whole Word and seeking to please Him in this area, we will gains the skills to be able to discern between what is right and what is not right [inappropriate]. As the people of God who are training to be priests and kings as future rulers under Christ in His kingdom, we MUST be learning to discern between right and wrong, the clean and the unclean, what is lasciviousness and what is pure and modest. By what we have had to learn in our lifetimes, we can then teach others when God's begins to call the remnant of Israel, and people from all nations to become the Holy People of God.
Ezekiel 44:23 And they shall teach my people the difference between the holy and profane, and cause them to discern between the unclean and the clean. 24 And in controversy they shall stand in judgment; and they shall judge it according to my judgments: and they shall keep my laws and my statutes in all mine assemblies; and they shall hallow my sabbaths.
A side note is that we honor God's Sabbaths and His Holy Days by how we appear before Him in His assemblies and He desires for us to be dressed in our best and in such a way that we are adorned with His righteousness rather than coming before Him and others in immodest apparel. When we appear before Him dressed inappropriately, we dishonor Him; and we are not hallowing His Sabbaths as He commands us to.
God is Looking for Strong Women Who Are Not Afraid to be Different from the World's Standards
As women of God, we are to present our bodies as a living sacrifice in ways that we may have never considered. If we present our bodies in holiness and modesty, we will be good examples to each other and to our children of what true modesty looks like. By our examples we can encourage and teach others to dress with modesty even when it is not very popular in this day and age. God expects us to take a stand on this issue and to live differently than the rest of the people around us.
Romans 12:12 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
Modesty is the opposite of lasciviousness/lewdness and immodesty is the embodiment of provoking impure thoughts in ourselves and others. Both send messages to all those who come into our presence. Modesty is the respectable, decent, honorable manner of adorning one's body and in how we present ourselves to God and others, born out of a freedom from a worldly definition of beauty and worth. When we choose to be modest in all that we wear, and in how we talk, and by our modest behavior, we show that we are motivated by a love toward God, a hatred of sin, and a desire to draw attention to Him and not to ourselves.
When we choose out certain pieces of clothing we need to be conscience of whether or not it fits in with our goal to be respectable and holy in all that we are and all that we do. We can use the opportunity in how we dress to be fine Christian examples and to send a very strong message to others about what it is to be a godly woman of God; and we do this without even having to say a word. Modesty is one more sign or badge that we belong to our HOLY and RIGHTEOUS Espoused Husband. We are His holy Spiritual Temple and it is imperative that we keep it clean, pure, dressed in righteousness; for Jesus is not going to marry an immodest and lewd Bride.
We can reflect back to our studies on the Beatitudes and apply those attributes toward being modest in all that we think, say, and do, including in how we dress.
Yes brethren, modesty is another way we can be the lights to the world that it so desperately needs. And the darker this world becomes, which it is going to do for a little while longer; we as ladies that make up the Bride of Christ [in this very delicate yet important issue] can be lights that shine brightly as the Women of God that God has called us to be.
Matthew 5:13 Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. 14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. 15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.
Constance
| 
1st John 3:3 And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure.
