There are many ingredients to quality effective self leadership that come into play when you are seeking to grow your career and improve the quality of your life.
I believe that one of the most important ingredients is the ability to SHOW UP STRONG in every situation. And, the best way to do that is through stealth self-awareness of knowing exactly
who you are and what you do. I'm not talking about what's on your business card or LinkedIn profile job description...something deeper than that.
When my kids were young and exhibited bad behavior, my admonishments usually sounded something like this: It's not cute, it's not clever, and it's not charming....it's just annoying...now, knock it off.
Sometimes, I feel like doling out that same admonishment when I hear successful executives describe themselves or their capabilities using a style that includes: self-deprecating humor, self-diminishing humility, or self-effacing dismissal of praise. (These 'selfies' are neither cute, clever, nor charming.... so,knock it off.)
I have an exercise attached for you to try. (Know This Exercise). Before you do, there are three ground rules to follow:
Rule #1: Be HONEST
If you're smart, savvy, sophisticated and tenacious.....say it and own it. If you're not...don't say it to impress anyone.
One of the worst pieces of advice I have heard around this topic is this: Fake it 'till you make it. I offer no apologies to anyone who espouses that when I say...it's bad advice, it's inauthentic, it's disrespectful to the universe and it's dangerous.
A physical trainer would never say to you 'just fake the fundamentals of the movement and put some weight on the bar'...you'll figure out the movement later. No, you'll look ridiculous and you'll likely get hurt.
#2: Do the work ALONE
Another piece of advice I do not ascribe to: Ask 3 people whom you trust what THEY think you are good at.
Here's the flaw in that advice (in my opinion): What indisputable insight, magical powers, or mystical vision would someone outside of yourself have into your heart, soul, and mind to tell YOU what you do well? Don't you really and truly already know? Don't you, at some level of your being, already recognize those areas of your work and life where you shine? If you think you can't do this exercise without someone else feeding you data, I suggest you look for what GAIL's are blocking your vision. (GAIL Sheet)
Don't cede your power or seek influence from anyone outside of your self to REMEMBER your own strengths.
Rule #3: Be REAL
If you've worked one-on-one with me, you know I don't accept answers to my questions that sound like a sales brochure or 'politically correct' answers that are void of personal connection. So, don't approach this exercise trying to write what you think will 'sound' good...do it with an open heart and mind to root out your personal truths. Be specific, be personal, and be ready to defend what you write.
An offer for you to consider:
Complete the exercise, pay attention to the ground rules and, if you want feedback that will help you fine tune, tighten up and provide you with a framework to show up strong with a raised level of self-awareness....send it to me and I'll send back my thoughts and suggestions.
