May 2015
   
Harris Coaching and Consulting            
Thoughts for Leadership and Life
    
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Church Knot and Double Binds
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Friends and Colleagues,

 

There is a lot of fuzziness about the distinctions between a church's purpose or Mission and the various mission activities it carries out.  I take a stab at bringing more clarity in my main column.


 

A leader's Emotional Intelligence has been found to be critical to success in so many areas of life.  Even more so it is critical that pastors and other church leaders grow in their EQ.  You will see a good introduction to EQ and how Jesus exemplified amazing EQ in the resource section.


 

Are you or a pastor you know moving to a new congregation in the next few months.  If so, I encourage you to get my book Entering Wonderland: A Toolkit for Pastors New to a Church.  It offers a wealth of resources to help the new pastor make a good entrance into the congregation.

 

I am currently making final plans for a two-day, one night retreat for pastors new to their churches.

To be held in mid-October, it's going to be near Baltimore.  I will have more information in my July newsletter.  Interested?  Please check with me. 

 

If you know someone who might benefit from my thoughts here, please use the "Forward to a Friend" button in the newsletter (that way you'll avoid problems with spam filters) 

 

Here's to clarity about how God is leading us!  

Peace,      
Bob  


 

Getting Clear about Mission and missions

 

What is Mission These Days?

 

Is "Mission"

  • sending emergency aid to Nepal?
  • marching in a demonstration against police brutality?
  • driving for Meals on Wheels?
  • lobbying your member of Congress for a cause you are passionate about?

Or something else or all of these and a lot more?

 

I think it's really important for a congregation to be clear about God's calling.  (regular readers of this newsletter and clients know that I emphasize this!)  Who does God yearn for this church to be at this time and place?  Why should you even be in business??? 

 

Clarity about your calling leads to a clear sense of your purpose.  This is Mission - with a capital "M". 

 

In my January newsletter I suggested that sometimes it's better to clarify short term priorities before undertaking a Major Mission study.  I have found that leaders sometimes back into more clarity about God's call by identifying immediate priorities.

 

An inner city church in Baltimore might have had a de-facto Mission of simply surviving but since the death of Freddie Gray and the subsequent violence and rioting, realized that God had bigger plans for it.  Perhaps God was yearning for that church to be an oasis in which people might talk with one another and figure out ways of rebuilding a fractured community.  Or perhaps it might discern that God wanted business and governmental leaders to be much more creative and assertive in generating good jobs for those who can learn to be skilled workers.

 

So a specific mission (lower-case "m") might be empowering a school teacher to be God's person in and out of the classroom.  Projects such as those I cited initially are mission efforts.

 

What is crucial is that your mission projects be consistent with your Mission, i.e. sense of God's greater calling to the congregation.  If you are clear about your Mission, then you can decide which mission projects you attempt and which you don't.

 

Are members of your congregation attempting to continue doing mission projects that they've been doing for 30 years or more just because your church has always done them?  If so, are you having trouble finding volunteers to do all those tasks?

 

Tony Robinson, in Transforming Congregational Culture, notes that in our post-Christendom era "the church is once again seeing that "mission" is not a department, a budget, the activity of a designated "mission" committee or the transfer of resources overseas. ... (It) is inside our sanctuaries as we engage there in the work of changing, healing, and transforming, and of sorting out gospel values from Western culture and its values."  (p. 74) 

 

What he and others assert is that we need to be about the task of equipping church members to be in ministry as God's people wherever they are.  This equipping will involve both strengthening worship and spiritual growth within the congregation but it is most certainly not limited to the congregation. 

 

So a specific mission emphasis might involve your church members getting involved with the juvenile justice system in your community.  It might mean helping people grow in their cultural understanding so they might build community with immigrants to the U.S.  It might mean helping older and younger members deal more creatively with the challenges of age and infirmity.  Mature executives might help younger leaders deal with the ethical and moral dimensions of being a leader.

 

And then there's that thing called love.  I think it's both ironic and pathetic that McDonald's promises a sense of love  ("I'm lovin' it) as a result of patronizing its establishments.  What a vision: love under the golden arches! 

 

One of the church's most important missions is to reach out to the many who are looking for authentic and loving relationships.  And tragically, so many congregations don't know how to demonstrate that love to a newcomer. 

 

Rachel Held Evans, writing in the Washington Post, addresses what churches can do to attract Millennials in this column .  Noting that some 60% of young adults have opted out of church, she describes some of the whiz-bang shows that are attempting to win them back and then asserts that young adults aren't looking for rock concerts.  They are looking for authentic relationships and a deep quest for divine mystery.  "If young people are looking for congregations that authentically practice the teachings of Jesus in an open and inclusive way, then the good news is the church already knows how to do that. The trick isn't to make church cool; it's to keep worship weird... What finally brought me back, after years of running away, wasn't lattes or skinny jeans; it was the sacraments. Baptism, confession, Communion, preaching the Word, anointing the sick - you know, those strange rituals and traditions Christians have been practicing for the past 2,000 years. The sacraments are what make the church relevant, no matter the culture or era. They don't need to be repackaged or rebranded; they just need to be practiced, offered and explained in the context of a loving, authentic and inclusive community."

 

Such churches are clear about their Mission.  And their missions.

 

Be clear about what God's yearning for your church is.  That's your Mission.  Then empower members to reach out in lots of mission efforts in the Spirit of Christ.


I would welcome the opportunity to  help you clarify both your Mission and what mission efforts would carry out that Mission.

 

If you would like some help to grow as a leader, I encourage you to consider coaching, either one on one or in a group.  Most of my coaching is done by phone in order to minimize commuting but I make exceptions.  Further, phone coaching makes it possible for me to have clients who live many miles away. 

 

If you find this article helpful and think it might be helpful to a friend, please forward my newsletter to that friend using the "Forward to a Friend" button.  

 

 

Resources - books and other resources that have been helpful  
   

 

The Emotional Intelligence of Jesus: Relational Smarts for Religious Leaders - by  Roy M. Oswald and Arland Jacobson, Rowman and Littlefield, 2015

 

"This is a book about the importance of emotional intelligence in the culture and dynamics of congregational life, with Jesus as the exemplar.  Our hope is that viewing Jesus through the lens of emotional intelligence will actually advance our understanding of Jesus. " (p 9)

 

Roy Oswald and Arland Jacobson offer pastors an introduction to emotional intelligence (EQ) and its importance.  "You may be a brilliant theologian, excellent at biblical exegesis, an outstanding preacher, a great pastoral care provider, and even give your body to be burned, but if you are not emotionally intelligent, your ministry as a parish pastor will be difficult."  (p119)

 

In 1995, Daniel Goleman, of Case Western Reserve University, published his groundbreaking book Emotional Intelligence, in which he asserts that EQ is more important that IQ in having a successful and joyful life.  His work has been the foundation for probably thousands of academic research, papers, and books and articles on management.  He and subsequent thought leaders have shown that even if one cannot grow much in IQ, they can grow in their EQ.

 

Oswald and Jacobson organize their book around some key EQ competencies, demonstrating how Jesus exhibited these competencies and how having such competencies will help anyone.  They are:

  • Self-Awareness - the ability to understand one's own emotions and behaviors and their impact on others.  I ask my clients to be aware of their internal reactions to stress and their external response. 
  • Empathy - the ability to understand others' feelings and situations and to express your understanding to them.  It isn't sympathy - feeling for, but a feeling with.  It is a sign of grace.
  • Assertiveness - the ability to express one's ideas and feelings, neither being passive (unable to express ideas) nor aggressive (attempting to abuse or dominate another).
  • Optimism - the ability to see the positive side of life, the belief in a God of abundance
  • Stress Resilience - the understanding that "S*** happens" and the ability to flex with the inevitable ups and downs of life.  Leaders with this quality can (using the old phrase) "comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable."

 

There are more specific dimensions to EQ in the two most commonly used EQ instruments but the authors wisely choose to focus on key competencies.

 

However, they go beyond the normal list of EQ competencies and identify two more of Jesus' emotional competencies that are key to building his new reign of love:  love of enemies and forgiveness.  Loving and forgiving those whose behavior is destructive transforms both the enemy and oneself.  It generates a new kind of community. 

 

Emotional Intelligence is critical for vital congregations and for effective ministry.  This book provides a fascinating perspective for seeing Jesus as exemplar of EQ.  It gives a foundation for understanding EQ and, I hope, will encourage pastors and other leaders to grow in their EQ.  Thinking about Jesus from an EQ perspective will help preachers communicate more effectively.  Growing in EQ will help a pastor avoid many pitfalls.   I commend it to anyone who seeks to grow in faith and strengthen relationships.

 

 

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What books or resources have you found
 helpful?  I'd be glad (with available space) to share your reviews and/or suggestions.  
Future Issues (bi-monthly)
  • July 2015 - Framing and Re-Framing Conversations
             
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Bob
Robert Harris, Professional Certified Coach
Harris Coaching and Consulting

Author: Entering Wonderland: A Toolkit for Pastors New to a Church

703-470-9841