A Halloween Hoax or a real movement "The Death Café"

I am a news junky and one story that recently stole my attention on NPR (National Public Radio) was about Death Cafés.

It is a movement that started in England and which is rapidly gaining popularity here in the States, among other countries. In fact, there are at least 40 such cafés here in the United Sates.

In Europe they are called by such names as Café Philosophique and the Café Scientifique. These are places where individuals have philosophical discussions about death and dying.

These are not support groups or death with dignity driven conversations.

So I had to ask, what is the appeal? I like to spend my free time thinking life affirming thoughts. I am more the cotton candy and sheepdog day dreaming type. Why would I join one of these groups?

From what I have read, the purpose is to open a dialogue on a subject that people simply avoid yet it is the one certain experience we will collectively share.

As you know from my seminars and my book, there is no intelligent point in hiding from the inevitable. If fear of going to that place in your head will keep you from taking steps to protect your loved ones when you are gone then maybe discussing that fear has value???

So many people who come into my office have a hard time discussing their desire to be buried or cremated as if talking about death will invite it closer. The only thing that refraining from talking about it will do is create a "legacy of harm" when your loved ones are left to fend to themselves at your death.

Last year I witnessed my beautiful and beloved Aunt Janet die. (Check out her amazing video on my YouTube Channel) In my profession, I have witnessed many people pass. It has been a gift to me in that I now understand that what is left is literally a shell.

Each time, the person who died looked like they were at peace. I could see how sharing my experiences and perceptions in such a setting could impact those who fear death.

There are two things that I fear. First, is suffering. Perhaps that could lead to productive conversations about how our society manages end of life decisions and explorations of alternatives.

Second is leaving behind my family before I have had a chance to watch my children grow and succeed. Even uttering those words has lifted me in an unexpected way.

If you are not persuaded by any of the philosophical underpinnings described, you may be moved by the one constant at every meeting...they serve tea and cake!

Here are some links to recent news articles on the topic that you can click on:

Link One

Link Two

Don't forget to make a plan...Remember, death is as much a part of life as birth, and we do not chose either. The one difference is that you can choose how your death impacts the loved one's who you leave behind.

Happy Halloween!!!

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Alzheimer's News Flash!!!

For the first time, and to the astonishment of many of their colleagues, researchers created what they call "Alzheimer's in a Dish" - a petri dish with human brain cells that develop the telltale structures of Alzheimer's disease.

In doing so, they resolved a longstanding problem of how to study Alzheimer's and search for drugs to treat it - the best they had until now were mice that developed an imperfect form of the disease.

The key to their success, said the lead researcher, Dr. Rudolph E. Tanzi of the Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston, was a suggestion by his colleague Doo Yeon Kim to grow human brain cells in a gel where they formed networks as in an actual brain.

They gave the neurons genes for Alzheimer's disease. Within weeks they saw the hard Brillo-like clumps known as plaques and then the twisted spaghetti-like coils known as tangles - the defining features of Alzheimer's disease.

The work, which also offers strong support for an old idea about how the disease progresses, was published in Nature on Sunday. Leading researchers said it should have a big effect.

"It is a giant step forward for the field," said Dr. P. Murali Doraiswamy, a professor of neuroscience at Duke University. "It could dramatically accelerate testing of new drug candidates."

Of course, a petri dish is not a brain and the petri dish system lacks certain crucial components, like immune system cells, that appear to contribute to the devastation once Alzheimer's gets started. But it allows researchers to quickly, cheaply and easily test drugs that might stop the process in the first place. The crucial step, of course, will be to see if drugs that work in this system stop Alzheimer's in patients.

The discovery, said Dr. Sam Gandy of the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai in New York, is "a real game changer" and "a paradigm shifter." He added, "I'm really enthusiastic to take a crack at this in my lab."

Click Here to continue reading this article

My Watch Dog Watchdog

Police Are Missing Millions of Cases of Elder Abuse: How to Recognize the Signs

It is estimated that between 1.5 and 2 million older adults are abused every year, however, only 1 in 24 cases are reported. This means that law enforcement is missing or overlooking a lot of cases, said Tim Hardiman, a 23-year veteran of the NYPD. It is imperative that officers know the signs of elder abuse and take the time to investigate suspected cases.

What is Elder Abuse?

Elder abuse is any form of mistreatment that results in harm or loss to an older person, said Joy Solomon, director and managing attorney at The Harry and Jeanette Weinberg Center for Elder Abuse Prevention.

Older adults often endure years of abuse and, on average, an older victim suffers for 10 years before coming forward about abuse. This is because the abuse almost always involves a person an elderly person trusts or loves, very similar to cases of domestic violence. In 90 percent of cases, a family member is the abuser.

Forms of Elder Abuse

Here are some of the more prominent types of abuse:

Financial exploitation: This is the most common form of elder abuse. Perpetrators often find ways to access an older adult's money and use it without permission.

A Metlife Mature Market Institute study found that $2.9 billion is stolen from older adults each year in this country as the result of elder abuse. It is also considered exploitative to use an older person's items (like cars, homes, etc.) without permission.

Physical abuse: Physical abuse can be different for older people than for other demographic groups. For example, it is considered physical abuse for a perpetrator to take away an older person's cane or walker, rendering them immobile. In other cases, abusers may give an older person excessive medication to keep them drowsy or debilitated.

Sexual abuse: 18 percent of women who are raped are 60 years of age or older.

Emotional abuse: Emotional abuse is present in almost every case of abuse and encompasses a wide range of behavior. It can include put-downs, name calling, threats (e.g. abandoning the victim, putting the victim in a nursing home, physically harming the victim), the silent treatment, treating the victim like a child or even abusing the victim's pet.

Neglect: Neglect of an older person's basic needs, such as not providing proper hygiene, can be considered abusive if the perpetrator is a paid or court-appointed caregiver, or if a person claims to be a caregiver and then fails to provide care.

Polyvictimization: Often multiple forms of abuse occur, whether it's multiple incidents or multiple abusers. Similar to other types of crime, once an older person has been abused, they are more likely to be victimized again.
There is a strong similarity between elder abuse and domestic violence. In both cases, victims are hesitant to press charges or go through with prosecution because they feel dependent on the perpetrator, said Hardiman.

To read this article in it's entirety, Click Here

My last seminar of the year is in Marina Del Rey!
"Raising UP

Your Parents"

Saturday, November 8, 10 am to 1 pm.

Click Here to Register

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2014

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Saturday, Nov. 8,

Marina Del Rey Marriott

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