Thanksgiving is a choice we make and that choice has far more to do with the reality inside of us than with the reality around us.  

I heard of a story where after a young girl's birthday celebration, her mother began to constantly remind that 12-year-old daughter to write her thank you notes.  When the girl finally sat down to do her duty, she began with her aunt who lived out of state.  

you can make someone write a "thank you" note, but you cannot make them be truly thankful and grateful.

Again and again, the Apostle Paul (in his joyful, thanksgiving and gratitude-filled letters) tells us to not just simply say Rejoice in the Lord always, but say Thanks be to God, and sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.  And Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.  From all appearances, Paul's gratitude was in spite of, rather than because of, his circumstances.  

Paul's life wasn't easy. He had been criticized, betrayed, attacked, beaten, stoned, imprisoned, shipwrecked. His "thorn in the flesh" tormented him and his enemies were such that he lived continuously under the threat of death. But there was something on the inside of him that prompted gratitude. 

We too live with disappointments, failures, sicknesses, and sorrows that we are not able to control.  We can't control what life brings us, but we can control what we will do with what life sends our way.  

What you look for in life, you tend to find, and it's all too easy to only give thanks when life is filled with blessings, and I certainly hope we do that.  But Paul suggests that we Christians have a reason to give thanks even in times of difficulty, because God is here, because He is loving and powerful, and because we trust that He is at work in our lives for good.

 If what we look for is what we find, do you look for blessings? Do you recognize them when you see them and then believe that every good thing in life comes as a gift from God? Do you see the glass half-empty or half-full?  And do you look for and accentuate the deprivations of life, or the blessings of life?  If you don't have the right stuff on the inside, you won't be able to see it on the outside. 

There are people who live in very favorable circumstances, yet are not very thankful nor grateful as they complain about the life they have been given. 

At the same time, there are those who experience problem after problem, yet they live in perpetual gratitude for the blessings they have received as they joyfully and expectantly await further expressions of God's love.  

We cannot explain either the presence or the absence of gratitude by looking only at circumstances because gratitude has far more to do with the inside than with the outside. 

No matter where you go, no matter what you do, it is you who brings your values, your perceptions, your expectations. And generally, what you look for, you will find and your expectations will help to make happen.