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At times my world seems quite large, at others, quite small. In regular contact with people all over the planet, I feel unrestricted by space, until I read of a typhoon killing ten thousand people and displacing close to a million in a far away country. At such moments, overwhelmed by the magnitude of suffering, it seems that my cozy and safe rabbi cave is an insignificant dot on the map.
An invitation to officiate at the wedding of a child of a couple I married almost thirty years ago stretches my world. Not having words to comfort a friend on the loss of a grandchild shrinks my world back to size.
When I meet students of students, my world expands. An email from a woman abandoned by her husband reminds me of the limitations of my reach.
Listening to students developing an idea far beyond my imagination is a taste of the eternal, shattering the physical limitations of my world. Hearing how they manage challenges beyond my comprehension is a painful reminder of my inadequacies.
I recently experienced both worlds, large and small, in an extended line of fellow passengers waiting to board a long delayed flight. Everyone from the overwhelmed gate agents to the impatient travelers strongly voicing their frustration felt helpless. All fell silent when someone turned on a television to a report on rescue efforts in the Philippines. Our problems were insignificant.
A stooped, elderly man stepped forward and began to quietly pray for the victims. The man, I later learned, a Baptist Bishop, had such presence, he seemed larger than any of us, and by the way he carried himself brought out the best behavior of everyone in the crowd. We all insisted that he be the first to board the plane. Our world was simultaneously small and large; as passengers we were small, as witnesses to massive suffering, even smaller, and yet, we were reminded how internal grace and dignity expand us.
This week's portion describes Jacob learning how to concurrently exist in both worlds. He begins by sending Angels as messengers to Esau, making it clear that he was no longer the little brother who purchased the rights of the First-Born, and who stole blessings. He now commanded heavenly angels, but he quickly switches to describing himself as Esau's servant. Which Jacob is speaking, the large or the small?
Jacob the Large, commander of heavenly angels, wrestles Esau's angel, returns to his camp, wealth, family, and possessions, but it is Jacob the Small who bows to his brother. Jacob the Large purchases a field, and is honored by God at an altar, but it seems to be Jacob the Small who allows his sons to respond to the violation of Dinah, and remains silent when his children respond to his rebuke, "Should he treat our sister as a harlot?"
"The Lord said to Jacob, 'Arise, go up to Beth-el and dwell there and make an altar to the Power Who appeared to you when you fled from Esau your brother' (Genesis 35:1)." It was time for Jacob to shed who he was when fleeing Esau. "So Jacob said to his household, 'Discard the alien gods that are in your midst; cleanse yourselves and change your clothes' (Verse 2)." Jacob understood God's message, and it was Jacob the Large who instructed his household to discard any sense of the small, to cleanse themselves of their limitations, and change into the clothes of people who will use their greatness to respond to typhoons and abandoned women, to comfort the suffering and to face challenges.
He needed angels at the beginning of the portion but not after he found his power and dignity within himself. Perhaps Jacob the Large sent the angels as he did at the beginning of the portion, but not as messengers; he sent them away. He did not need miraculous means to face the world; he needed Jacob the Large, he needed himself.
We cannot say, "It will take a miracle to help so many people!" We cannot look for angels. We must look inside ourselves and discover ways we can help, if not in the Philippines, in the communities in which we live. We can learn to live larger and receive God's blessing as did Jacob at his largest, Israel, "And kings shall issue from your loins (Verse 11)."
Shabbat Shalom,
Rabbi Simcha L. Weinberg
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