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How did Noah Pozner's mother find the words to celebrate his life at her six-year-old son's funeral? Even as millions of strangers choked on the words to express their reactions, she found the words to begin healing her wounded world. We sighed in comfort when one of the hundreds of victims offered healing, and wonder if there any words for Adam Lanza's father to speak of his son's horrific crimes. There are none. He's been permanently robbed of meaningful words.
Are there words for a father who learns that his offspring has massacred tens of people, ruined countless lives? Can a father find words to speak of a child violating the life of another family member? "Joseph harnessed his chariot and went up to meet his father in Goshen. He appeared before him, fell on his neck, and he wept on his neck excessively (Genesis 46:29)." Jacob did not hug Joseph. He didn't kiss his son upon seeing him for the first time in twenty-two years. Jacob was silent. There were no words for the father of men who wiped out Shechem, sold Joseph into slavery, and then lied, allowing him to needlessly mourn for more than two decades. Jacob would continue to mourn, no longer for Joseph, but for his other children. No wonder all he could say to Pharaoh was, "Few and bad have been the years of my life (47:9)."
Jacob, we will soon read, was not silenced - he was saving his words for the final days of his life. The words hadn't disappeared; they were stored, studied, edited, and nurtured for when they would resonate with lasting effect.
There is a powerful difference between words silenced and words stored. Words silenced are an acid that burns away our inner being. The quiet is heavier than the cries of a depressed child. The pain of silenced feelings is far louder than the cries and complaints of a teenager living on the streets, a woman stuck in a horrible marriage, a father at loss over how to speak to his troubled children.
There are no words to describe the consistent irony that the words were silenced by words - angry words, hateful words, cruel words - words uttered without being stored and studied. Words stored allow other words to be uttered. Words not stored suck out the words of their victims.
Parents are being advised to speak with their children of the Sandy Hook Massacre. Perhaps we should first practice storing all our words, treasuring them, before we begin these talks.
May the souls of all those killed in Sandy Hook be bound up in the bonds of eternal life.
Shabbat Shalom, Rabbi Simcha L. Weinberg President If you are interested in sponsoring our  winning Newsletter, please email info@thefoundationstone.org Go to our Blog  Follow us on Twitter   Become a Fan  | 
