The Mental Gym Get Emotionally Fit
October 2013

 
Our monthly tips (below) are designed to help keep you in-shape emotionally:
Thank you for taking a moment to read, reflect and invest in your well-being.
 
Please visit The Mental Gym, The Canine Cure, and The Ascot Angel Program for additional tips and resources. These websites are easy ways to request an appointment in either our West Hollywood or Santa Monica location or set up a video/phone session.

Both Fernanda and I wish you a happy and healthy autumn.   
  
  
With Kind Regards,
William Benson, LMFT, LPCC 

 

Bill's October Tip: How to get Rave Reviews

 

Many consider The Great Gatsby the great American novel because it effectively casts a myopic eye on a psychological self-consciousness that still plagues our culture.

 

A story of material wealth eventually buckling under the weight of emotional assumption, Jay Gatsby pushes his image to grandiose proportion in an effort to gain the simple reassurances only love can realize. The orchestration Gatsby undertakes to win such attention is alarming - and familiar...

 

Everyone knows a Gatsby

 

"Great" Gatsbys exist everywhere: Ardently associating with something popular or someone successful, these "old sports" appear larger-than-life as they weave their accomplishments into conversations or design encounters to secure some form of endorsement - because they need endorsing.

 

Gatsby's are not alone in their need to stand out 

 

In today's world "extra-ordinary" is commonly sanctioned: Athletes use anything to surpass performance limits: Magazines airbrush images to perfection: Scripted reality rules television....

 

It is easy to understand why many of us stumble down the troubling path of proving our worth in order to feel worthy: Attempting to be great, as if who we are is not enough by default - unlit candles that must glow with firecracker intensity or risk being deemed substandard.

 

Are you a Gatsby? 

 

Take a moment to assess your level of self-consciousness:  

  1. In social situations, what's more concerning - how you're coming across or  whether you're having a good time? 
  2. Do you think by losing 10 pounds or making six-figures you'll be better accepted by others?  
  3. Do you put on a public face only to go home to peer naked and trembling into your private reflection?

Remember: Jay Gatsby died unfulfilled and looking into the distance  

 

This month, lets set down our self-judgments and happily face what's in front of us with gusto and genuineness.

 

Maybe it's time we stopped our posturing and proving and, instead, wrapped our arms around the experience of being where we're at and who we are...     

 

...Now that's a novel idea.  

 

Fernanda's October Tip:
The Truth is in the Words    

 

Have you ever noticed that some friends you go to lunch with spend the whole time complaining? They complain about their lives, about the behavior of others and about the likelihood that life's only going to get harder for them. Have you ever noticed that you leave these encounters feeling badly?

 

Then you lunch with friends who just let bad events roll off their backs, make light of heavy situations and spend time telling you funny stories about their kids, work, and their adventures. These friends talk about their future in a positive and confident manner: They smile a lot. They laugh easily. They are thoughtful. These experiences make you feel good!

 

The stories we construct, the emotions we adopt, and the words we utter can have a direct effect on how easy or difficult our lives become.

 

We manifest what we speak

 

We all have the power to pack a suitcase with a strong arsenal of words and language that affirms our lives, with a rich selection of emotions that are positive  and supportive, and with stories that take responsibility for the lives we have led, and create a plot of possibilities for the lives we want to lead. 

 

This month, consider the words you use from your "carry-on" that accompanies you in your daily life-and see how often you pull something positive out. If the bag becomes heavy, check it. A positive outlook and words will keep your bag from becoming "baggage" and keep your life rolling happily along.

Getting Through the Holidays

After the Loss of a Baby

Through Pregnancy, Infancy, or Early Childhood

 

A workshop to explore some of the complex issues facing parents as they approach the many holidays centered around children and families

 

Opening Speaker: Grieving, Honoring, and Celebrating

Fernanda Carapinha Erlanger, MFTI

              Panel Presentation: The Impact Of and On Families

Break-out groups for sharing and discussion

  

Sunday, October 13, 2013

1 - 4:30 p.m.

 

Cedars-Sinai Medical Center

Harvey Morse Conference Center

South Tower, Plaza Level

8700 Beverly Blvd

Los Angeles, CA

 

For more information or to RSVP, contact:

[email protected]

310 423-6389 

 

This is a community-wide workshop, arranged in conjunction with

Forever In Our Hearts/Good Beginnings, Cedars-Sinai Medical Center,

The Parent Connection, Huntington Hospital,

and M.I.S.S., Los Angeles.

 

Parents, grandparents, extended family members,

and health care professionals are welcome
 
Our practice is founded with the understanding that professional psychological perspectives can help those looking to achieve important goals or work through life challenges.

Similar to building physical strength at a gym with the help of a personal trainer, our clients work to increase their emotional growth through the guidance provided by our clinicians.

  PPO insurance plans accepted - Credit cards welcomed
All newsletter material � 2013 The Mental Gym.