August 2014

www.HeartsatHome.org

There it was in black and white. These were words that would prove to change my perspective on failure and my strategy for parenting.

Knee deep in research for the Hearts at Home book Got Teens?, I stopped my reading and let my eyes focus on these words from a study on the teenage brain: the brain optimally grows in failure.

I pondered those words. The brain doesn't just grow when we make mistakes. It grows best in failure (TWEET THIS).

Think about the impact of really understanding this. If you and I can grasp that growth happens best in failure, we'll change the way we see it in our life, our spouse's life, and our child's life.

Failure is positive, not negative (TWEET THIS). It's motivational. Highly educational. And it's often where God does His best redeeming work.

Unfortunately most of us don't see it that way. We look upon failure with disdain. We hide our imperfections, hoping to keep others from seeing our reality. The way we handle failure is partly influenced by our perfection infection culture and party influenced by the way we were raised.

Was it safe to fail in the home in which you grew up? Is it safe for your kids to fail in your home? The answer to those two questions will be very telling on how you perceive failure.

Embracing failure allows us to learn from our mistakes, develop resiliency, forgive ourselves and others, and to come to understand that God loves to do His best work through the cracks in our lives.

So the next time you make a mistake, you can say to yourself, "I know what's happening. My brain is growing!" Then you'll be taking the first step in loving your failures!

Joining you in the journey,

Jill Savage

Wife to Mark

Mom of Anne, Evan, Erica, Kolya, and Austin

Nana to Rilyn, Landon, and Marie

with Jill Savage

Wise Teaching for Your Group

Are you looking for a speaker who teaches the value of failures? Do you need a voice of reason to come and speak to your group?

Jill Savage speaks at a variety of conferences and other private and public events throughout the year. She speaks on the topics of motherhood, marriage, adoption, parenting, living with less, and women's issues in both church and business environments.

Jill will work with your theme, your audience, and your needs to provide inspiration and practical takeaways for every person in the audience.

To see if Jill is coming to an area near you or to contact her about speaking at an upcoming event, visit www.jillsavage.org/speaking.

Forgive Failures and Control Negative Thoughts

By: Jerusha Clark

Anywhere between 12,000 and 50,000...

What do you think that number represents? The number of dishes a woman will wash over the course of her life?

Certainly a possibility, but no. According to the National Science Foundation, 12,000-50,000 is the average number of thoughts that will pass through your mind every single day! Research also indicates that well over 90% of those are thoughts you've had before, and - here's the kicker - scientists estimate that somewhere between 70-80% of the average person's thoughts are negative. No wonder women feel overwhelmed!

Negative thoughts include worry, complaining, anger, feelings of inadequacy or inferiority, judgmentalism, and despair. Every woman faces destructive thoughts at some point. Many of us battle them daily, but God promises that a peace-filled mind is possible.

Isaiah 26:3 proclaims, "You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!" Because we are not perfect, our minds will wander. What's wonderful, however, is that God's peace is always available because He never changes. He is perfect. He always keeps His promises.

If you desire victory over negative thoughts, start keeping track of your mind's patterns. If we think and rethink and overthink the same negative thoughts (and research indicates we do), we can break free by identifying the patterns and confronting them specifically.

Remember, also, that you decide what to fix your mind on. Philippians 4:8 and 9b commands, "Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise...then the God of peace will be with you."

I've tried - entirely unsuccessfully - to control a lot of things in my life (indeed, I'm a recovering control freak!), but I can control my choices. You can too. Thoughts may flit in and out of our minds, but we decide whether to dwell on them or not. Together, let's determine to dwell on the thoughts that bring peace and life and love into our lives. That choice will change everything.

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Jerusha Clark is the bestselling author or co-author of ten books, including Every Thought Captive and The Life You Crave. You can meet Jerusha at the Hearts at Home 2014 North Central Conference.

To learn more about Jerusha visit www.jerushaclark.com/Welcome.html.

A Hearts at Home Mom Loves Her Failures

One night my young son said, "Maybe we should go eat Mexican. I've been craving fortune cookies." My husband and I are obviously failing in all lessons of culture.

~ Connie, Mom of 2 girls and a boy

2014 North Central Conference

Registration is Open for the

Hearts at Home 2014 North Central Conference!

Join us on November 7-8th in Rochester, MN, and Love Your Life!

With past favorites and new faces, we promise you an amazing weekend filled with fun, laughter and learning!

Sally Baucke is back for Moms Night Out! She's made us all laugh until we've cried by sharing her observations on what we deal with as women, wives and moms.

Hearts at Home favorite Dr. Kathy Koch loves helping parents understand children's uniqueness and purposes. Take this opportunity to hear her speak in-depth as one of our keynote speakers.

We're excited to welcome keynote speaker Angela Thomas who is best known for her passionate heart and story-telling humor. She is the best-selling author of more than 16 books, including Choosing Joy, 52 Things Kids Need from a Mom, and My Single Mom Life.

Group discounts are available! Visit www.HeartsatHome.org for more details and to register.

Start your school year right by joining Dr. Kathy Koch, Jill Savage, and Focus on the Family August 18, 19, 20 for 3 days of No More Perfect Kids discussions on the Focus on the Family broadcast!

You can catch the program on your local Christian radio station, listen through the Focus on the Family Daily Broadcast app on your smartphone, or download the program as an iTunes podcast.

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Hearts at Home
1509 N. Clinton Blvd.
Bloomington, IL 61701

Email: hearts@heartsathome.org

Phone: 309 828 MOMS

Web: http://www.HeartsatHome.org