Today's Message: Accidental Friendships
Last October I flitted through my house cleaning and cooking, preparing to host 17 guests that evening, male and female. PANIC MODE, you might say. But when the opportunity to have lunch with a friend presented itself, away I went. Just like that. Giving no intelligent consideration to the fact I had much to do and the clock was ticking. As is typical for me, knee-jerk HEART consideration prevailed. How could I decline?! LUNCH! FRIEND! RESPITE! A CHANCE TO TALK ABOUT HOW PANICKED I AM, HOW I WON'T GET EVERYTHING DONE IN TIME! WITH SOMEONE WHO WILL UNDERSTAND. And make a sad face for me and talk about interesting things while the clock is ticking down and I ask for yes, just one more iced tea refill. Nearly at the restaurant, I sat in my car at the stoplight waiting to turn left. A quick glance at my watch revealed I was a few minutes early, even though I was running late preparing for my event. YAY! (Hey, we take happy where we can find it.) After I got the left-hand arrow I made the turn. I needed to make another left--immediate left--into the parking lot of the restaurant. Traffic blocked the entrance, but a kind lady backed up a bit and waved me through. I waved back and smiled, guided my car through the slot and ... OH, NO! An SUV in the curb lane--which apparently kind lady didn't notice in her rear-view mirror--was headed straight for me. BLAMMO! After I caught my breath, we stared through our windshields at each other for a moment. Luckily we didn't hit hard enough to take anyone else's car out, such as kind lady;s. (Kind lady whom I shouldn't have trusted. :)) Since we were blocking both lanes of traffic, I motioned for my Blammo Partner (BP) to turn into the lot. We parked our vehicles and I got out to talk to her. She said she was fine, as was I. She was pretty calm and very kind. She stated it was just an accident and we were both okay. She hoped we could quickly exchange information and inform the police later. She said she was in a hurry to meet a friend for lunch. It's the way we roll, eh? I asked BP to please wait while I called my insurance company to see if exchanging info and moving on would be okay. I was informed by them that the police had to come to file a report. I learned BP was from Chicago, where reporting accidents later is right when nobody's hurt and all cars are drivable. Not so in the suburbs.
My lunch date arrived, made sure I was okay, assessed the situation and said she'd see me later. (Smart call.) BP phoned her lunch date, who was already at the restaurant of their choice. She didn't want to wait either since who knew how long our "reporting" would all take. (Smart call.)
It took the police at least 20 minutes to arrive. No biggie. It was a nice day and this wasn't an emergency--excluding lunch dates. But GHEESH! They acted like they didn't know I had 17 people coming to my house that evening!!!!!!!!! BP and I chatted outdoors, leaning on our cars while we waited. She was very nice. Said she'd recently encountered a similar situation where the roles were reversed. She said the other "gentleman" had aggressively yelled and carried on and called her names, so much so she stayed in her vehicle and drove straight to the police station, afraid for her well being.
 Time marched on there in the parking lot. Good thing George was home cleaning. (Again, we find happy where we can. :)) After the policeman arrived, it took another 50 minutes to take our reports and do whatever secret things they do in their vehicles for so long.
While Mr. Officer was in his squad car, BP and I continued chatting. At one point I said to her, "I'm starving. You interested in lunch when we're done? After all, we're in the restaurant parking lot and we both missed our dates. We have to eat some time." She said sure. She listened while I talked about how panicked I was now trying not to be about my company. I listened while she shared a few tidbits about her life.
When the policeman finished doing secret things in his vehicle, he got out and said, "I was sitting in my car laughing. Are you two really going to have lunch together?" We nodded. "If this had been two men, they might be punching each other out." Me: "And this is why we need more women in politics." :) Seriously, I said that. "I really hate to do this," he said, "but I have to." That's when he handed me the ticket. Anyhoo.... While dining together (I bought, since, well, the ticket and all and her car had damage) BP and I enjoyed chatting, getting to know each other a little more. Turns out she's a writer too! We have since stayed in touch and in fact recently had lunch together again. This time we met in the middle, geographically and without incident. I'm sure we'll gather again, and keep up the email friendship as we share more pieces of our lives and daily activities, including new writing goals for each of us. You never know from whence or how a new friend will arrive. You also never know when is the last time you'll see and talk to a friend. I know: I lost my best friend last July, and we lost our dearest couples' male friend one month to the day later. As we approach this Valentine's Day, rather than get caught up in the couple love we have, or don't, or have but sometimes wonder about, let's focus on giving thanks for, and to, our friends and neighbors. Buy some paper doilies and red construction paper. Get creative. Hand deliver or mail. Or call and explain that you thought about making them a card but remembered you weren't crafty or ran out of time, but you still wanted to let them know you care and appreciate them. Smile at strangers. Thank everyone. Make this a better world if you can. Seek friendship in unlikely places. Amen. | 
