I have just recently learned to play poker and at my age that seems a wee bit ridiculous.  I am a member of a small group that plays twice a week and I've come to truly love the game.  It would take an unusual circumstance for me to miss one of those games.  This story was instigated by just that - a man who missed a poker game.

One of our most devoted players was too ill to play.  He just couldn't get out of bed - or so he said!  The same man, however, got out of bed, into a wheel chair and left the building.  He does this no matter the weather or temperature, to do just one thing - smoke a cigarette!

Some years ago, my right leg was amputated above the knee and I began wearing a prosthesis and walking with a cane.  I quit teaching full time and decided that substitute teaching would be a good way to earn some money or have the freedom to work only when and where I wanted.  But this is not about me, it's about a 6th grade class, and smoking!

This particular 6th grade class was located in one of those "portable" buildings on the other side of campus.  As I approached the room on my first day, I saw a small gathering of students, both boys and girls, trying to conceal themselves behind the building - smoking.  Being new on that campus and a "sub," I said nothing and continued to walk past the group.

While waiting for the classroom to fill, I wrote my name on the board.  As I turned to face them I could sense that "what the heck do we have here" stare that often greets brand new subs who come limping in on a cane.  "Ladies and gentleman, my name is on the board.  As I was approaching your room today I saw a very strange sight.  I observed some of you guys Bar-B-Qing your faces!"  They just sat there, a few mouths were at half-mast and the rest stared at me as though I was just plain crazy.  Finally, one brave soul in the back spoke up, "Mr. S., what in the world are you talking about?"

"You tell me.  How many of you know somebody who cooks that way?"  Almost every hand went up and I said to myself, "Aha - I got 'em! They have forgotten I am a sub."

"Well, I don't know how, who can explain it to me?"  They all wanted a piece of the action.  I picked a young lady who was squirming and waiving.  She said, " My dad squirts lighter fluid on the briquettes and lets them burn till they turn grey and start to smoke a little."  Unable to resist a boy chimed in, "My dad soaks wood chips overnight and sprinkles them on when the coals get very hot and boy, do they ever smoke!" 

"Ok, when do I put on the meat?"  "When the coals are good and hot, and there's lots of smoke," says a boy called Jim.  "So what cooks the meat, Jim?"  "The smoke and the heat," says Jim - I had to remind myself that these kids were just 6th graders.  "Seems to me you've answered your own question - smoke and heat - that's what I was talking about.  That's the two elements you have when you light up a cigarette - think about it!"

"Before we go any further, I want you to help me with a question.  Take a slip of paper and simply tell me what you think smoking is.  I'm sure you have often heard it called a habit, but what do you think it is?  Writer your answer and pass it to the front."

Their answers came out to about 50-50.  "Do any of you know someone who has tried to quit smoking?"  The floodgates had opened.  Jim again, "My dad is always trying to quit.  He has tried to quit lots of times but it has never worked.  He's still smoking!"  "Well doesn't that show you something?  Once you start, it is very difficult to stop."

After that it was one story after another - they didn't want to stop.  But finally I said, "Ok guys, those of you who think it's just a bad habit might want to reconsider.  Once you're hooked, you're hooked and very few people can just 'kick-it' cold turkey as they say.  Of course there are exceptions - there always are."

"Now let's get down to the nitty gritty of smoking and what this conversation is all about.  To be fair, are there any positives?"  A young lady by the name of Shirley went first, "Well, I think it looks very grown up and sophisticated - the movies make it look pretty darn cool."  "Good points and I guess those things are important to folks your age.  However, I think you'll change some of that thinking as we explore the negatives."  Jim chimed in again, "It may seem a little 'old fashioned' but when I see a pretty girl with a cigarette in her mouth, it makes her 'not so pretty.' But that's just me." 

"Ok, one at a time, what's the biggest negative you can think of from your own experience?"  A poll of the class came up with an almost unanimous choice, the smell!  Again, all kinds of stories and examples - the breath, the clothes, the house, the car, and then there's the inevitable "ash tray."  Everyone objected to having to empty them, but the biggest gripe of all came when a girl mentioned the "butt in the coffee cup."  Disgusting was the way she described it.

"Ok folks, let's get on to the really important issue, health."  I was amazed at just how much these young people knew about lung cancer, second hand smoke, emphysema, etc.  And they each had a friend or relative to tell a story about. 

Finally, a young lady with a very serious look on her face raised her hand and said, "My name is Louise and I've been thinking.  Do you really believe that smoking is like Bar-B-Qing our faces?"

"Yes, Louise, I do but it is one of those cumulative effects - sort of like filling a wheel barrow with sand, one grain at a time.  It's slow but it adds up.  I know it's hard for you to imagine because you're very young, but if you smoke one or two packs a day, like most smokers do, it adds up fast... Before we end this very interesting discussion, there is one thing nobody has mentioned - any ideas?"

A very studious young fellow named Ted offered, "I know - its money!"  "He's right.  I don't know what a pack goes for these days - don't smoke, never have - but there's just one thing you can be sure of... do you know what that is Ted?"  Ted replied, "The price will only go up."  "Why? Because of two things, the price of tobacco and taxes, you're right Ted.  And in any case it adds up over a lifetime no matter how long or short that may be.  My advice is DON'T START!" And the bell ended our discussion.

I reported to the principal to explain that I had not followed the teacher's lesson plans but due to the subject matter he heartily approved.  I went on my way and that was the end of it... or so I thought.

Several weeks later I was asked to return to this same campus.  As I was crossing that vast playground, I hear a yell, "Hey guys, here comes that dude that told kids they were Bar-B-Qing their faces."  When I got home later that day, I said to my wife, "Honey, I've just had one of the best days of my career."  "How so?"

"They remembered!"