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"life is beautiful" (EXCERPT)
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You can't breathe until you choke
You gotta laugh when you're the joke
There's nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive
Just open your eyes
Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
https://youtu.be/xjX2KYuAJcAÂ |
Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, etc., when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.
Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theater and Sports Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are the furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people are also very surly folks.
The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.
Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!
Doctor's Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go see the doctor. By the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
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"You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try." - Beverly Sills"With ordinary talents and extraordinary perserverance, all things are attainable." -Sir Thomas Fowell Buxton"The principle is competing against yourself. It's about self improvement, about being better than you were the day before." - Steve Young"If you do not expect the unexpected, you will not find it, for it is not to be reached by search or trail." - Heraclitus
"You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win." -Zig Ziglar
"If is easier to go down a hill than up, but the view is from the top." - Arnold Bennett
"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." - William Jennings Bryan
"A certain amount of opposition is a great help to a man. Kites rise against, not with, the wind." - John Neal
"Your hopes, dreams, and aspirations are legitimate. They are trying to take you airborne, above the storms, above the clouds - if you will only let them." - Diane Roger
"You cannot discover new oceans unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore." -Lord Chesterfield
"Kindness is tenderness. Kindness is love, but perhaps greater than love. Kindness is good will. Kindness says, I want you to be happy." - Randolph Ray
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