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When preparing this newsletter, I always try to touch upon a diverse group of topics. In this issue you will find articles written by a bereaved spouse, an adult child as well as a woman whose mother died when she was a young child. We also feature two poems by previous authors and some writings from recent Bereaved Parents and Grieving Behind the Badge newsletters. Sybil Sage is our bereavement artist this month.
If you would like to share an article, request a topic of interest featured in an upcoming issue, or recommend a blog, webste or book, please contact me. I'd love to hear from you!
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Our next issue: July
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Running With Vince (adult twin death)
by Jonathan Kuiper
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In 2005, my twin brother Stephen was killed in a car accident. I clearly did not understand until his passing that the grieving process is ongoing and there is no time limit. It wasn't until a few months ago when a second edition of my book, Running With Vince, was published that I completed that part of my journey.
Running With Vince was an idea that popped into my head, just a few weeks after his death. I wondered what it would be like if Stephen, my twin, had been with me the morning and days that followed his death. The first wink that led to this idea came early on, even before he passed fully over. At the time of his death, even though we were miles apart, I was wide-awake and knew that something was odd about that morning.
~ Read More ~ |
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Mama Chicken and Dad Biscuit
by Lisa Marie Leary
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I've never liked the word grief. To me, it just doesn't describe the experience of losing someone that you love, of that moment when you realize that they are gone forever. There really is no word for it, but I like melancholy. In the book Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo, which was one of my favorite books as a child, a young girl describes missing her mom as melancholy. In that book, her mother left the family when she was just a baby, but I found that I could relate to that feeling after my mom passed away when I was eleven years old.
~ Read More ~
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Artists who design memorial art and condolence gifts for the bereaved
Memories in Mosaic Art
 | | Artist, Sybil Sage |
Every time that Sybil Sage has lost a loved one, she was reminded how important it is to find coping mechanisms. She found that looking at photos was comforting. That's why Sybil set out to find a way of embedding photos into the mosaic art she had been doing. Sybil collaborates and executes your creative vision on a vase, picture frame or other pique assiette art, the French style using nipped plates. Custom orders can be personalized with photos and text.
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Written by bereaved parents for bereaved parents and their families
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This Star Still Shines
by Lori Earl
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Our daughter Esther was born on August 3, 1994 in Beverly,  Massachusetts. She was the bridge between two older sisters, Abby and Evangeline, and two younger brothers, Graham and Abraham. In November 2006, Esther was diagnosed with metastasized papillary thyroid cancer in Marseille, France, with extensive tumors already in her lungs. Following a thyroidectomy and seven months of treatment, our family moved back to New England for her continued treatment at Boston Children's Hospital.
~ Read More ~
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I am in the cool breeze that forever blows so softly in the wind that passes by you,
feeling at peace, where pain is no more,
I am in a timeless paradise full of love that's so true.
I am in the melody of your favorite songs, gently swaying to the tune to the music with harmony in my soul.
Feeling free with ease to soar far away into paradise, engulfed in bliss and joy, dancing like never before, completely whole. |
The Grieving Behind the Badge Newsletter is comprised of articles written by men and women who serve their communities as first responders
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Caring fOr Police Suicide Survivors
by Janice McCarthy
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On March 5, 1993, my husband Paul had just gotten home from working  an overnight shift and spending all day in court. It was just after 10 pm when I crawled into bed after checking on my 7- month-old, Shannon, who had been running a fever.
I was praying for a quiet night, when the phone ringing on the night table next to me pierced the silence. The station was calling for Paul. They had an open spot on the midnight shift. Did he want it? I was just about to say no when I heard his sleepy voice say, "I'll take it."
~ Read More ~
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Project Blue Light: Remember How They Lived, Not How They Died
by Robert Cubby
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Editor's Note: I strongly support the efforts of this organization. I hope you will read this article and support them as well.
Police suicide is the number one killer of police officers. A police officer is  more likely to be killed by his own hand than the hand of a criminal. These are sad but well published statistics.
Given that fact, it would be easy to assume that police departments and law enforcement would be well equipped to honor their fallen. We see funerals well attended by scores of well-dressed officers of all ranks. We see the pipers and drummers playing their mournful and respectful tunes. There is the 21-gun salute, the folding of the flag ceremony and the flag being presented to the mourning family member, the playing of taps and the memorial plaque hung in a conspicuous place in police headquarters or the town hall. This is what we expect for our heroes who died in the line of duty to receive and rightfully so.
~ Read More ~
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Something From Nothing: A Path Through Grief
by Karen Wyatt, MD
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 As I write this, I am preparing for a journey back to the home of my childhood where I will mark the one-year anniversary of my mother's death. I was with her throughout the week before she passed away and had the privilege of shepherding her through that transition-a moment I had been preparing for since I first became a hospice physician. I knew many years ago that I would be with my Mom on the day she died and that it would be one of the most important days of my life.
Her death itself was actually joyful, though it was a process that took a great deal of inner work on her part, which has also been true for many of my hospice patients. Mom had been ready and waiting to "go home" for the previous 5 years and was relieved that her time had finally come. So as she took her last breaths I had to celebrate on her behalf, that her struggle was coming to an end, even while my heart was breaking as each thread of our physical connection slipped through my hands and I confronted the enormity of that loss.
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Regaining Balance and Hope
by Janice Beetle
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Somehow, I managed to get through 47 years without losing someone I loved through death, so it took me that long to learn that death isn't just sad. It can unbalance you.
After my husband, Ed Godleski, died only four months after being diagnosed with metastatic lung cancer, I learned that loss makes you question reality.
I was aware of the stages of grief, and I had assumed I would travel through these stages neatly, one by one; but I learned that you cope with each phase over and over again, and sometimes all at once.
In a five-minute span, you can weep incessantly, rage at the world and maybe even cackle at your lack of control. All this before you stop and wonder, "Die Ed actually die?"
~ Read More ~
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First Step Hope: Not All Wounds Are Visible
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If Not For You
by Richard Belford
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 If not for you, we may never have known
The magic in marrying ones soul mate.
The pleasure of a sister in-laws company.
Or the laughter shared with an aunt.
We would not have felt,
The delight in a mother's joy
The passion of a grandmother's pride.
Or the sorrow in her loss.
~ Read More ~
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Listening Is An Act of Love
by Beth Rotondo
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 In grief, the heart is traumatized. Everything it knew for sure is thrown up in the air, unanchored, grasping for familiarity. The mind is also traumatized. It looks for answers, for sureness, for the past, for right and wrong. This confusing and tumultuous time is what people who are grieving experience moment by moment, day by day, week by week, month by month. It is exhausting, constantly changing, overwhelming and frightening. This may seem "dramatic" to someone who hasn't experienced a significant loss. Many people find it strange that the griever is "still" grieving after all this time.... and the griever may feel those same feelings. People want to help and there are various ways to do that. One of the simplest and most profound ways is listening.
~ Read More ~
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 Beautiful Boy by David Sheff
What had happened to my beautiful boy? To our family? What did I do wrong? Those are the wrenching questions that haunted every moment of David Sheff's journey through his son Nic's addiction to drugs and tentative steps toward recovery.
Man's Search For Meaning
by Viktor Frankl
Psychiatrist Viktor Frankl's memoir has riveted generations of readers with its descriptions of life in Nazi death camps and its lessons for spiritual survival. Based on his own experience and the experiences of others he treated later in his practice, Frankl argues that we cannot avoid suffering but we can choose how to cope with it, find meaning in it, and move forward with renewed purpose.
 How a Fortune Cookie Can Heal Grief
by Nan Zastrow
WDid you ever think that a fortune cookie could offer a profound message of comfort, happiness, and peace in a life stressed by grief? Nan uses the simple fortune cookie to weave a modern parable of life and teach the value of attitude and choice in grief work. The fortune cookie demonstrates the concept of HOPE.
Grief Digest Magazine
a publication of the Centering Corporation
Your new, reader-friendly magazine will include the best writers and speakers in the field of bereavement. There will be interesting articles on coping and dealing with grief, help for the caregiver and most of all, the usual quality and support you expect from your Centering family - a quarterly support group at your fingertips.
Be sure to visit our Good Grief Book section on our blog
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 The Sweeney Alliance began in 1996 in rural West Tennessee. It had been of dream of mine to start a company to provide support services and educational programs and resources for the newly bereaved in our local community. Little did I know where that dream would lead me. Find out about our journey since then. ~ Read More ~HOW YOU CAN HELP Your donation helps provide all three of our newsletter free of charge.
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