It's June!  My favorite month.  Everything is green now after a long cold winter. And with the heavy spring rains, there's a lushness in the garden - plump round bushes and fat leaves on trees.  My pink peonies bloom with abandon.  Three rabbits have taken to living in the front yard, frolicking among themselves in the early mornings.   

May, on the other hand, was a difficult month regarding neighbor relations.  And of course that is the most compelling part - something that rubs you the wrong way and holds your attention in a negative spiral.  

So how to be with these disturbing thoughts? Most of the time, I try to push them away and focus on thoughts or things that make me happy.  But there are days when those thoughts and feelings just won't go away and can't be ignored.  I have been for the most part, ignoring our neighbor in spite of some very odd actions that were aggressive and bordered on harassment.  In this case, something happened that compelled me to draw a line.

I wasn't comfortable drawing that line, but I knew I needed to do it.  My husband and I decided that calling the police was the best thing to do.  The local Oak Park police officer who came to the door within 15 minutes was a warm hearted African American man with many years on the force.  He'd been around the block many times and could clearly see that this was a neighbor issue and recommended mediation.  He also talked to our neighbor and recommended the same.  And the odd behavior stopped.

It's easy to get up on my high horse and think that of course I am right and my neighbor is wrong.  I know that path.  But does that really solve my challenge with my neighbor?  If anything, all it does is concretize the situation by demonizing my neighbor, and it makes harmonizing our relationship even harder.  So I've been watching how I do that as well, for that can be also be a never ending spiral.  

I'm open to outside mediation since I've stopped talking to my neighbor. Communication is the first step toward making things better.

Life can't always be a bed of fragrant peonies.  Though I am quite attached to my peonies!  And attachment to anything - even peonies - most certainly ensures suffering down the line.  As the great 8th century Indian Buddhist scholar Shantideva says, "we should thank our enemies and bear them no ill-will for they are helping us to practice patience."  

Ho'omanawanui (patience) is a good quality to cultivate. Also knowing when to draw the line and set boundaries is needed to skillfully live life.  I wasn't happy about having to call the police, but it was the thing to do in my situation.  Things have calmed down.  The experience was a valuable lesson in strong medicine for me.

Alva Kamalani

 

 My Kumu Hula sister Alva Kaipoleimanu Kamalani came to Halau Hula Ka No'eau in Waimea, Hawaii Island about a year before me. We practiced and danced together for over a decade.   We laughed together, cried together, spent many hours making leis, sewing costumes, and even started a circle of foot massages with our hula sisters before competitions.  Alva was the po'o pua'a (head student) during our `uniki (graduation) preparations and ceremonies.  

Na Kumu Marlyss Kohara and Mari Giel

 

Alva has a daughter, Ann-Gaylin Kaleiwohiokalani Chang Kamalani, who lives in Keaukaha with her three year old son (Alva's grandson), Matthew Kaumualiialoha Kamalani.  Alva's halau is called Halau Manu Le'a Hawaii and she just uniki'ed (graduated) two kumu, two ho'opa'a and two 'olapa.  This is a huge accomplishment!  Here's Alva Kamalani's hula story in her own words. 

 

I was born in Honolulu at Kapiolani Hospital - June 7, 1952.  My parents - David Mekelanaopuaonalani Kamalani was born in Honolulu in 1926, lived at Kalia during his younger years and then moved to Palolo Valley.  Maude Kaipoleimanu Logan was born in Kahuku in 1926, lived in Laie before moving to Honolulu to work. Both parents worked and retired from the Honolulu Police Department.

 

I attended Kamehameha Schools for kindergarten, but developed bronchitis and my family moved to Laie and the drier climate.  I attended Laie Elementary School for two years and was there when Hawaii became a state.  When we returned to Palolo, I attended Palolo Elementary until sixth grade and returned to Kamehameha Schools for grades 7 - 12. I tried college for a bit but I really didn't like the education available.  

 

I spent a year as a nanny in Beverly Hills and was able to travel and experience so many things being away from Hawaii. When I returned, I felt I needed to explore Hawaii or being Hawaiian.  I was working at Sure Save, a grocery store in Waimea, when I saw a poster on the bulletin board for a hula class.  I thought "something to do" and I might get some exercise.  Well, it took over my life and is now something I am and I still get a little exercise.

 

When I joined Halau Hula Ka No'eau in June 1987, I had already planned to attend the International Hula Festival in Honolulu with my friend at the end of June.  It was awesome that I got to see [Kumu] Michael and his four dancers on the stage.

 

That same month I was invited to join another halau class that was preparing for a presentation at the Volcano.  We spent the weekend in the park, performed on the pa hula, were treated to many stories by Auntie Ulu Garmon AND drove to the coast to see and experience the lava flowing in the sea. Then I was hooked on the whole idea.   

Being with hula was not always happy but neither is life.  There were times I thought I would just quit, but having worked through it all, I can say it was worth every laugh, cry, and everything else in-between.
 
After our `uniki (graduation) in 2000,  I asked Michael for a name for my halau.  He asked if it has to have the word "halau" and I said yes.  So, it was Halau Manu Le`a Hawaii.
 
I always was happy learning new things through hula, like hiking along Saddle Road to pick lehua.  Or visiting the Ruddles at Paniau and eating, dancing, singing and gathering kupe'e(edible marine snail).  Or going to a retreat on the side of Mauna Kea.  What I found is that I really enjoy watching students who think they cannot dance find they can dance.  I have learned more from my students than I could possibly have shared with them.  What a cool deal!
 
I made it clear that competition would be something the dancers would have to want, I was not concerned with doing competitions.  At first they insisted we never enter a competition.  And then it began, first one dancer - Jessie Rodrigues - solo wahine in the Kupuna Hula Festival.  Big learning for both of us.  And then the solo dancer - Charlotte Labrador and group hula dancing Pua Ahihi. 

Next solo dancer was Mary Mich and group hula - `O Waikulumea.  We spent days at Aleamai and swimming in the river in the song as part of the preparation.  Last year we danced a group hula - Kaulana Na Pua.  I enjoyed this one the most.  Joanne Erlandson began dancing with us in January and it was wonderful to see how they all came together for this hula.

Being able to share the stories of the past, present and future through oli and hula is probably the most important thing to me. But my greatest joy is watching someone finally discover their ability to hula having previously thought they could not dance.

Halau Manu Le'a Hawaii