A few weeks ago, a program aired on TV documenting the beginnings of what is now known as Silicon Valley.   Running through all of the stories was the stated belief that "the risk is worth the possibilities."  Today we have overwhelming evidence of how that belief paid off and keeps on doing so as Silicon Valley continues to churn out electronic wonders.

How can we appreciate more the wonders that happen when we take risks to communicate with one another?   In Fearless Conversations I often work with people who are on the brink of risk and cannot see beyond the risk to the possibilities.   

A recent example was the situation of two teachers whose jobs require that they work as a team.  Their extraordinarily different philosophies of teaching put them at such loggerheads that their students and the children's parents were becoming upset with the deteriorating situation.  The principal was beginning to believe that his only option was to fire them.  Instead of taking such a drastic action, he asked a trusted mentor of both teachers to intercede.  The mentor consulted with me; I coached her so she felt better prepared to facilitate the conversations between the teachers.   (Let's call them Beth and Mary.)

The mentor guided the principal in enlisting the cooperation of the teachers.  He told them what mattered most to him: "I need assurance that you will be able to enhance the learning experience for your students and create an atmosphere where you each are respected for your gifts and talents."  Instead of setting up an ultimatum, he made a request: "Would you be willing to draw up, together, some specific goals and strategies to accomplish this and present them to me by Friday of next week?"

When I suggested a very direct approach with the teachers, the mentor hesitated: "Yes, but what if Mary offends Beth?"  In this situation, as is so often the case, the offense had already happened - both ways.  These teachers did not respect each other and could not work together.   They essentially had stopped talking to each other. You could say they had "hit bottom" and the only way was up.  The stakes were high.  Any perceived risks were worth taking for the sake of beneficial possibilities - for themselves, their students, and the school community.    

The mentor helped Beth and Mary break down the biggest risk of all which was to talk to each other.  They began by talking about their worries and about what matters most to them in their teaching.  Beth wants to be able to initiate new things that are important for her to try.  Mary wants to be heard for all of her years of experience.   Both have worries about job security, even if for different reasons.  

What else did they risk?  They risked abandoning their judgments about each other so they could talk authentically about their needs and values.  They risked checking out their assumptions about how they were being perceived by the other.   They risked unpacking all the blame they had heaped on each other over situations and misunderstandings that they had never talked about in a timely fashion.  Slowly, but surely, they began to see that the narratives they had created about WHY the other was acting in a certain way, simply were not true.

They got to the point where the mentor was able to guide them through a process of making requests of each other -- requests that led to agreements to ensure their functioning as a team .  They have committed to specific actions by which they are developing a collaborative approach to classroom management and teaching.  They have agreed on protocols for decision-making and practices to support productive conversation between the two of them.   As a reminder for themselves and as a learning experience for their students, they have set up a "Peace Table" in their classroom  for settling disputes.  The criteria for coming to the table are: 1) they must not be angry at the time and 2) they must want to find a solution.

Obviously, these teachers were at-risk of losing their jobs so it was wise for them to do whatever it would take to keep their employment.  Besides, in the eyes of each other, their students and the school community, they were no longer seen for what they both love to do and are good at - teach.   At the invitation of their principal and with the guidance of their mentor, they took some risks to talk with each other.  Now their risks are paying off in the realization of possibilities: forgiveness, change in attitude, comfort with each other,  a new sense of spontaneity and eagerness in working together.  Wonders!  Really!  Overwhelming evidence - the risk is worth the possibilities!