January 2016 News & Events
Still Time to Donate for 2015 
Your chance to make a tax deductible gift to Hospicare for 2015 ends at midnight December 31. Thank you for your continued friendship and support. 

Please make your online gift now!

How to Say Goodbye

image of hands clasping
 

How do you say goodbye to someone who is dying? That is a struggle many of us face when our friends or family members are at the end of life. Sometimes our fear and reluctance to say that last goodbye stand in the way of a profound and important connection with our loved one. Paula Spencer Scott, contributing editor to caring.com, shares nine lessons for saying goodbye that she's learned from grieving survivors.

Lesson #1 Don't wait until the last minute. It's hard to say good-bye, but putting off meaningful conversations is perhaps the number-one source of regret. Time and again, families ask Massachusetts hospice nurse Maggie Callanan to tell them exactly when the final hour is approaching, so that they can time their good-byes. This is dangerous, she says, because it's nearly impossible to predict the final breath . . . 
 
Lesson #2: It's OK, even comforting, to let on that you know the end is nearing. Realize that the dying person usually knows what's happening, Callanan says. "When those in the room don't talk about it, it's like a pink hippo in a tutu that everybody's walking around ignoring. The person who's dying starts to wonder if nobody else gets it . . ." 
 
Read more about how to say goodbye to someone who is dying.
 
Ithaca Firefighters Give Donation

photo of firefighters_ Leyla_s family and Hospicare staff
Members of the IPFFA Local 737, Leyla Dietrich's family members and Hospicare staff take time out for a photo.
 
A few weeks ago the Ithaca Professional Fire Fighters Association (IPFFA) came to Hospicare to drop off a donation in memory of Leyla Dietrich, who was a Hospicare patient. Trevor Peyus, president of the Local 737, and Jamon Louis, Leyla's step-father and an Ithaca firefighter, presented the check for $500. The funds were raised when the union members hosted the statewide convention of firefighters this past July. Thank you IPFFA for your generosity.

Groton Art Group Donates Watercolor Painting of Hospicare Pond

photo of Groton Art Group members presenting painting to Mike Katz
Marian Davie (left) and Dyan Lombardi present the painting to Mike Katz, Hospicare director of development and community relations.
 
The Groton Art Group recently donated a beautiful watercolor painting of the Hospicare pond to the Residence. The group was inspired to paint the picture after they visited their friend Linda Draheim, who was a patient in the Residence.

Thirteen members of the group created the painting together. The artists are: Joan Packard, Marian Strang, Anna Miller, Nancy Meo, Marian Davie, Carol Derlen, Tom Steger, Ginny Underwood, Karen Atkins, Donna Atwood, and Linda Rutting, along with their teachers, David Beale and Emily Gibbons. Thank you all for sharing your talents with us and brightening up the Residence with your lovely painting. 

February 7, 1:00 PM
Cornell Wrestling Fundraiser
Cornell Wrestling is sponsoring a Community Challenge to donors and other supporters of Hospicare. The team pledges to pay money for every person in attendance at their match against Oklahoma State on Sunday, February 7. The match will be held in Newman Arena in Bartels Hall, Cornell University. We join Big Red Wrestling in encouraging everyone to attend the match, as funds will be raised based on attendance.

Save the Dates! 
Held at the Nina K. Miller Hospicare Center
172 E. King Road, Ithaca, NY
  • Women Singin' (1st Tuesday of the month), 1/5, 2/2, 5:30−7:00 PM
  • General Support Group for All Bereaved (1st & 3rd Wednesdays of the month), 1/6 & 1/20, 2/3 & 2/17, 5:30−7:00 PM
  • Monthly Bereaved Parents Group (1st Thursday of the month), 1/7, 2/4, 5:30−7:00 PM
  • Journey Through Grief A 5-week spouse or partner loss support group, Tuesdays, 3/1, 3/8, 3/15, 3/22 and 3/29, Noon-1:30 PM. Register by February 24.
Held at the Cortland Hospicare Office
11 Kennedy Parkway, Cortland, NY
  • Morning Support Group for All Bereaved (1st Tuesday of the month), 1/5, 2/2, 10:00−11:30 AM
  • Afternoon Support Group for All Bereaved (3rd Thursday of the month), 1/21, 2/18, Noon−1:30 PM
Held Offsite
  • Y Wellness Workshops Film Series A film series on end-of-life issues with discussion to follow lead by Hospicare volunteers. The movie Gifts of Grief will be showing 1/13, 6:30−8:30 PM. Free and open to the public. Held at the YMCA of Ithaca Wellness Center, 50 Graham Road West, Ithaca.
  • Contemporary Trends Stressless Chair Fundraiser (donate $50 to Hospicare, get $200 off a stressless chair). Now through January 18.
  • Cornell Wrestling Community Challenge for Hospicare Sunday, 2/7, 1:00 PM. This event held at Bartels Hall, Cornell University.
For more information on any of the above groups or events, please call 607-272-0212, or visit our Events page to download a PDF of our current calendar. Some workshops and events require preregistration.
 
Our mission is to bring medical expertise and compassionate, respectful care to people and their loved ones at any stage of a life-threatening illness, and to provide information and education about advanced illness, dying and bereavement to the entire community.
In the News

How to Remain Hopeful at the End of Your Life
A nurse explores different people's attitudes about the end of life and what we can learn from them.

Imagine a Medicare 'Part Q' for Quality at the End of Life
Medicare pays well for procedures to "cure" but underpays for the daily care and support desperately needed by the frail elderly who can no longer benefit from curative medicine. What if there were a better way?

If You Are Nearing Death and Want to Live Longer, Don't Go to the Emergency Room
A hospice physician looks at data that shows refusing aggressive care near the end of life actually lengthens the average terminal patient's lifespan by a month.

A palliative care physician reluctantly explores what California's new law allowing aid in dying will mean to her and her patients.

Right-to-Die Fight Takes Shape in New York
As more states pass laws allowing aid in dying, New York is on the front lines in the fight for and against the right to die.

Website of Interest

Dying In America 
Nurses from across the US talk about their personal experiences caring for patients at the end of life and suggest answers to some of the most pressing medical issues today.

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Help terminally ill people spend the end of their lives peacefully and without pain.

Our Wish List
Items to make patients and their families more comfortable. 

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