"Today" Starts The Night Before! by Mary Ann Abbott, Parent Consultant North Seattle Community College How would you describe your morning schedule? Smooth? Organized? Chaotic? Sloppy? Needs an adjustment? The picture of perfection? Blew it again! Just makin' it! We'll do better tomorrow. We began well in September but slid back. Maybe we'll get it when the children are older. Needs help!!! Maybe we'd all like a quick visit to Utopia where perfection reigns and all the players do the timely and predictable. But, maybe we don't want life to be "perfectly boring!" Most parents I talk to tell me they would like to improve the morning schedule at home. It's an ongoing battle to get everyone ready, leave the house together, and arrive at the intended destination with sanity, no tears-- and with everything you need. And, then, not feel defeated at the beginning of the day. Time management experts tell us to follow a reasonable schedule, a routine. Yes, that usually works. What changes the success is when a child has awakened several times during the night with a bad dream and can't wake up on time in the morning. Or, maybe you, the parent, had a deadline to meet, stayed up too late yourself, and now can't drag yourself out of bed. We're behind already! Other complications are just normal events in the life of a family. Imagine looking fifteen minutes for a missing shoe. Maybe everything was going great, but the cereal accidentally dumped down on a child's shirt. Perhaps the whole pitcher of juice slipped out of a child's hand in route to the table from the refrigerator. It could be that, even after the fifth reminder, your four-year-old still hasn't gotten dressed. She just wanted to see the last part of "Curious George." Or, maybe you dressed your 2 ½ year-old and now he's taken off his shoes and socks because they "felt funny." How many times have you retraced the steps of your child and yourself to hunt for the special blanket or love toy which is absolutely essential for your child's peace and goodwill during the day? Our good intentions get crowded out by the unexpected. Parenting expert Rosalind Duffy has written about "morning madness," in which she discusses streamlining the morning by preparing the night before. Such preparation lessens the amount of decisions/reminders which need to be covered in the morning and leaves time for handling the unexpected. This practice is more than a goal just to be considered. It really works! One parent I know was such a strong believer in this practice that she allowed her child to select clothes the night before, get dressed, and then sleep in those clothes so they'd save time the next morning. Maybe that's extreme. But, readiness the night before saves a lot of morning hassles. That means bathing the night before, selecting clothes the night before, organizing possessions in a backpack, maybe setting out the breakfast, doing whatever is complicated, and then keeping things/possessions in such a way that your child can exercise independence skills and not have to depend on you, The important part of this practice is sticking to it! (Hopefully, it also helps with the yelling!) For years, I have watched my husband's practices. He is well organized; some of his organizational abilities stem from his training as a boy in boarding school. Every night, he selects his clothes for the next day. They hang, ready for the next day, on the doorknob of the closet door. His books and office items are organized neatly, ready for the next day. This night preparation gives him more time in the morning. Guess what? I'm working to follow my husband's example. I'm trying to make order of the various "stacks" of things from my life: I have a chapel stack, a faculty notes stack, a childcare stack, a church stack, an exercise clothes stack, a knitting bin, a family stack, and more recently a photos stack. If I continue to smooth out my morning routine by getting ready the night before, I'll have more energy and desire left to keep my "stacks" organized. It's one routine I can change to promote daily sanity! Will you join me in doing what you can the night before? The success that you and your child will enjoy is well worth it! We can celebrate success together! | 
