I spent the end of last week in Washington, DC at a conference of Jesuit parish grade schools. One of the speakers we were lucky to listen to is a Jesuit priest named Howard Gray. He is a former literature professor, currently serving as the assistant to the president for special projects at Georgetown University. His remarks have stayed with me over the course of the week.

 

Using the story of the Good Samaritan, Fr. Gray outlined what it takes to truly interact with other people. First, we have to see someone. This means not just looking at a person. Rather, it means taking in the information through our eyes that leads us to a place where we can, however briefly, realize what it is to walk in that person's shoes. Second, using that brief empathetic moment, we have to feel something. Maybe it's happiness; maybe it's compassion; maybe it's pity...but we have to feel something for the other. Third, we have to do something. Perhaps it's a small action like a handshake or a kind word or two; perhaps it's more involved liked spending an hour with a friend to help them through an issue or project. Finally, we have to make some sort of connection. In the story of the Good Samaritan, he tells the innkeeper to take care of the injured man and that when the Samaritan returns, he'll pay for the cost of the care. The Samaritan connected another, the innkeeper, to the man. He starts a network of sorts.

 

This little instructional story for human interactions is one we should think about. It's one our students should think about. It is growing easier for us to live in a compartmentalized world where we don't have to interact anymore. I worry that we are slowly losing the ability to see and feel and truly connect. These four simple steps: seeing, feeling, doing, and connecting can help us find truer connections with those around us.