Self-defense should be emPOWERing. That is, you should be able to better assess risks and make your own safety decisions, rather than follow a "tip" sheet that doesn't reflect your reality.

Unfortunately, there's a lot of "advice" or "tips" in circulation that are more victim-blaming and disempowering.  I see these in mass emails, and field questions from students, constantly.  So I developed this process:  in five questions I can decide whether or not any specific piece of information is emPOWERing and worth adding to an emPOWERing self-defense toolkit.

The mission of Darkness To Light is simple:  empower people to prevent child sexual abuse.

Simple, yes.  Easy, no. 

It turns out that while most people are not going to abuse children, there are barriers that get in the way and prevent these otherwise wonderful folk from recognizing grooming patterns of those who do abuse.  Even if they do suspect something, well-meaning adults often have no clue how to intervene.  And many adults who do try to intervene or report their suspicions themselves are not supported or believed by other adults.

Enter Darkness To Light.  They have created an online training to help the average adult recognize and interrupt potential child sexual abuse.  While it is not free, it is very affordable and well-worth the $10 to go through the two-hour program.

Even if you do not have children of your own, or work with children, or in any way associate with children, do this.  Because you know other adults who do have children, who work with children, who care for children, and who one day may call on you to support them when they have to make that hard judgement call to report suspected abuse.

I've had, over the last 2 decades of teaching self-defense, several students take classes specifically because they were being stalked.  According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, about 7.5 million people are targeted by stalkers in the United States.  15% of women and 6% of men have experienced stalking victimization at some point during their lifetime in which they felt very fearful or believed that they or someone close to them would be harmed or killed.  The majority of stalking victims are stalked by someone they know: 61% of female victims and 44% of male victims of stalking are stalked by a current or former intimate partner, 25% of female victims and 32% of male victims are stalked by an acquaintance.

Statistics on stalking, however, don't tell us what it means to an individual who is targeted. This is what one student recently wrote of her experience:

 The Stalking Resource Center website has a LOT of material.  Be sure to visit and learn about what you can do to help.

Those of you who've taken a Strategic Living class the last 3 or so years got to practice your "Power Pose/Wonder Woman Stance."  Dr. Amy Cuddy, from the Harvard School of Business, has done research on how your body language and posture shapes who you become.  The ability to project confidence, largely via body language, is a key ingredient in personal safety.

Finally her work expanded beyond her widely-viewed TED Talk and a smattering of interviews and articles.  Her book, Presence, just came out less than 2 weeks ago.  I am looking forward to listening to it on audiobook, narrated by Dr. Cuddy herself.

Find out more about Presence from the publisher's site.

Self-defense skills are like CPR, you should review and practice them annually.  

If you've already taken a class and want to keep it fresh, Strategic Living offers a 50% discount on select classes. And, if you refer your friends to a Strategic Living class and they sign up, I will donate 10% of their paid tuition to one of three awesome organizations for women and girls. Visit our Paying It Forward page for details.

Do you work with a non-profit or community organization that holds silent auctions? Ask me to donate a gift certificate for attendance at a Single Day Seminar.

Do you work with a non-profit or community organization whose staff/volunteers/members/clients would benefit from a safety skills seminar? Visit our Donated Class page for information on requesting partly subsidized training sessions.