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November 6, 2013 Edition 

What About Socialization?         

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The Wuehler Family

In all of my experience with school-aged children, I have found that homeschooled children are the most positively socialized children of any other group--hands down. In fact, it was the influence of positively socialized homeschooled children that convinced me to home educate. It's no surprise that homeschooled children are different and looking at the culture around us, gladly so. This is not just my own experience; there is also current research that reveals this phenomenon.

 

Homeschooled children seem to make the best citizens, employees, and basically well-rounded adults. And it starts with the vast amount of positive socialization they receive during their home educated years. It's no wonder that by the time these kids finish high school; they are sought after by colleges, employers, communities, and churches alike. They are sought after primarily because of their positive socialization skills. They study hard, work hard, are interested in people, and serve others.

 

Although in the traditional sense, homeschool families seem to be masters of socialization, the thing about the word "socialization" that's a bit unnerving is that our culture is trying to redefine it. According to the following definitions of socialization, our children just may not fit:  

 

WordNet� 3.0, � 2006 by Princeton University:
"socialization" The adoption of the behavior patterns of the surrounding culture; "the socialization of children to the norms of their culture" (2) 

  

American Heritage Stedman's Medical Dictionary: "socialization" The process of learning interpersonal and interactional skills that are in conformity with the values of one's society. (3)

 

If socialization is a matter of "adopting society's behavior patterns" and "conforming with its values" no matter how anti-social, or wicked, then, no thank you! We have a much higher authority than society to guide us. Yes, we have the very words of God on the subject. What does the Bible say about socialization?

 

"He that walketh with wise men shall be wise: but a companion of fools shall be destroyed." Proverbs 13:20

  

"Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world." James 1:27   

  

Second Corinthians reminds us to come out from among the culture and be a separate, holy people unto our great and mighty God. To do this, we cannot and should not conform to our ever changing culture. We must stand firm in God's principles.  

 

If we truly want prosperous and successful children, then we need look no further than Psalm Chapter 1 and Joshua Chapter 1 which state that prosperity and success come from meditating on the Word of God day and night. Hard to do when you are in the wrong society.  

 

It is imperative that we keep our children positively and Biblically socialized, which is most definitely not in conformance with our surrounding culture. They will continue to be the best socialized children out there if they continue to be grounded in and surrounded with good society.

  

Socialization is not just about social activities, but rather positive social development where our children learn to impact their world. We teach our kids to give of themselves, care for their neighbor, love their God, and serve their community. We are doing what's best for their positive socialization and therefore a better society by keeping them Home Where They Belong.

 

[Excerpt from Socialization? What's The Big Deal? Read the full Editorial in the April 2013 issue of The Old Schoolhouse Magazine]

 

~Deborah

 dwuehler@thehomeschoolmagazine.com

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The Familyman 
 

I'm back. After almost a month of traveling, speaking, and enjoying some sun and warmth, we pulled into chilly northern, Indiana yesterday afternoon. It got a little nerve-wracking on the way home with a five-hour break-down delay . . . but God was gracious, and we got'er fixed and arrived home safe and grateful. Now if we can just get "the beast" unloaded and tucked in for the winter.

 

While on the road, we met so many homeschooling parents who feel just like you do. They want to raise children who love God and are prepared for the future. They feel worried, unsure, and wonder if they're ruining them instead.

 

Would you listen to me and relax? I've seen their kids, which are like yours, and you're all doing a great job.

 

And as far as socialization, let's put that little question to bed forever!!! It just doesn't hold water anymore. We've been homeschooling for decades, and the truth is homeschool kids are "plenty socialized." I speak to homeschool families as well as non-homeschooled families all over the country, and the homeschool kids are "WAY" better at engaging and "socializing" (in a healthy way) than their counterparts. Your in-laws, neighbors, and friends think the same (although they may not say it). Even an honest school teacher will agree. Home is the best place for kids, and it's the perfect place to learn (and practice) social skills.

 

Have a great week enjoying your children and be real,

Todd

 
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Raising Real Men    
 

It's a laugh line at conventions, one of the first reactions we get to our announcement, "We're going to homeschool the kids," and frankly, the question which will never go away. When most people's children spend the majority of their waking hours either physically in school, doing homework assigned at school, or taking part in social events and activities sponsored by the school, it's hard for outsiders to picture what homeschoolers do without all that institutional structure to guide them.

 

And from all indications, most of us take the challenge seriously. We push back on the question, but really, the majority of homeschoolers are busy with all sorts of things in their churches, neighborhoods, and communities. Learning at home is individualized, but it's not isolated unless we make it that way. And we all want our kids to grow up comfortable in all kinds of situations, able to speak easily and appropriately with people different than themselves, sensitive to other groups' concerns, and showing sensitivity and respect toward others' beliefs and cultural backgrounds.

 

Sometimes, though, the socialization problem isn't our kids'--it's our own. How's that?

 

Because the conviction and self-confidence and independence which help us take the big step into home education, can make us rather unpleasant people to live with if we don't keep them in perspective. For example:

  • How well are we dealing with family and neighbors who don't appreciate our homeschooling decision?
  • Are we able to be patient and respectful toward their well-meant, or even their intrusive, concerns?
  • Do we need to convince other parents that their choice is wrong in order to assure ourselves that our choice is right?

Homeschooling's not the only conviction we carry. We all have opinions on a wide range of issues-we have to have some ideas to work from when we face everyday decisions. They might be our political philosophy or our beliefs on religious practice. They guide the choices we make about diet, health care, the use of credit cards, and whether we plan to send our children to college or not. They inform us on whether Santa Claus comes to our house or if we choose not to celebrate holidays at all. They explain our preference for an Android device over an iPhone (though that should be obvious).

 

The apostle Paul dealt with a church that was growing contentious over issues which were not clearly commanded in God's word. Instead of confirming that one group was right and the other sadly mistaken, Paul advised them to "Let every man be fully persuaded in his own mind" (Romans 14:5), and give others the time and the freedom to seek God and hear from their own consciences. "Who art thou that judgeth another man's servant?" he asked. "Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify the other." (14:4, 19).

 

The ability to hold a firmly convinced position, but to love, live, and let live where God has given liberty--that's really the essence of socialization. It's good to remember that for ourselves while we're teaching it to our kids!

 

Yours in the battle,

 

Hal & Melanie Young

 
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Contest Corner 

For the month of November, 2013   

  

NameMeaning Gifts from CrossTimber 

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Cross Timber� is a company that offers Name Meaning Gifts, or gifts that answer "Do You Know What Your Name Means?" Products include name plaques, bookmarks, coffee mugs, name cards, Scripture plaques, keepsake boxes, and custom awards, with inspirational Scripture and the meaning of the name represented on the items. The items are completely customizable, with selected Scripture by request and 200+ designs to choose from. With a dozen years of experience designing personalized gifts, the owners research names and provide meanings according to the various origins, whether Greek, Latin, etc. Contact is fairly immediate when you use the chat box on the website and is almost as fast when emailing the staff. We received the 5 x 7-inch Name Plaque and bookmark for this review; the plaque was framed and personalized with our choices.
 
CrossTimber is definitely a company of choices. First, you decide whether you want to use the first name only or the first and middle. Then you decide on a background design; the 400+ options are broken into categories to aid in your decision process. (To read the rest of the review, click here.)

 

WIN a name meaning coffee mug!

 

BONUS: free name bookmarks for your entire family!  

 

Choose your own design for even the most unique name. Names are carefully researched from a Biblical perspective, with a supporting Bible verse.

 

TO ENTER: Email Heather with your name, mailing address, phone number for contact purposes, with the subject line, "CrossTimber" for a chance to win* a name meaning mug and name bookmarks for your whole family!    

In this week's issue:


Writing Tales

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