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 Diamonds to You  
       Helping you get the best out of yourself and others.                    

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Vol 11, Issue #1, Jan. 2016
Publisher - Author
Feedback or Criticism
Innocent Until Proven Guilty
ProMatch Workshops
University Courses Taught
Books Published
The Pros and Cons of Leading a Virtual Organization
Publisher, Editor, Author-
 ArLyne Diamond, Ph.D.
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ArLyne Diamond

 

 

 


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Hi:

Finally, finally, finally, my newly revised website is up and available for you to see at www.DiamondAssociates.net.  

I, like the cobbler's son with no shoes, had to wait forever for it to be completed.  My designer, who is clearly worth the wait, is my niece Gabrielle, the CEO of Inside Wide Designs (www.insidewide.com) .  She and I started the process long before we went to Africa together. It's not her fault - it was both of us - when she had time, I didn't and vice-versa.  But finally it is done - and I invite you to visit it and give us your feedback.

January has been super-busy both professionally and socially. I just completed a big client project that took up a lot of my time - and (hint, hint) I am available again for your consulting needs and your referrals.  Also, since my birthday is in January, I took lots of time to do fun things with friends, including giving myself (and a few others who share a birthday week with me) a party.

I am also finishing up another course for Proformative.  This one is called Investigating a Complaint of Inappropriate Behavior in the Workplace.  It should be available to you by the end of the month.

 Proformative has many courses that might be of interest to you - and your company.  Check them out @  Proformative.com.



Feedback or Criticism

I attended a meeting of an HR group the other night and the speaker, who was delightful and well informed, talked about giving feedback.  She felt the word feedback was less onerous than using the word criticism.  She also believed it is important to "sandwich" the negative feedback (criticism) with a positive before it and a positive after it.

While I agree that doing that softens the blow - I believe it is not always appropriate to soften it.  Sometimes you lose the message in the kindness - because you are actually giving mixed-messages.  You can be direct, clear, articulate AND kind at the same time without having to cloud your message by sandwiching it inbetween two other items.

What I believe is that there is no one way.  It depends on the people, the behavior, and the context.  If, for example it is the first time you are correcting someone about the way they are performing a task, you would probably use the sandwich method.  On the other hand, if someone was doing something against policy that was clearly inappropriate, you would not want to soften the message.  You would want to firmly state that the behavior was inappropriate and needs to stop.

We give feedback about minor things that are changeable.  We offer criticism when we want something changed right now.


Innocent Until Proven Guilty

It is so easy to fall into the trap of believing the first person who walks in your office door.  Once having heard the complaint we search for evidence to support the allegation.  This is not a neutral investigation.  It is biased at the outset.  Too, in the workplace, many HR policies preclude telling the person who has been accused who the accuser was.  People have the right to face their accuser - to know the full complaint and to be able to explain their side of the story.

Enough on this - take my Proformative course on Investigating and you'll get at least another hour on the subject. 

ProMatch Workshops I've Offered.

 

  • Jump Start Your Job Search:       
  • Marketing (Branding) Yourself:   
  • Strategies and Tactics for your Job Hunt
  • Self-Assessment Seminar 
  • Who are You?  Part I & Part II  
  • Negotiation Skills for Women:     
  • Getting Your Mojo Back 
  • Enhancing Your Professional Image:  Your Unique Brand
  • Enhancing Your Professional Image:  Your Unique Brand - again
  • Business Planning Seminar
  • Negotiation Strategies and Tactics
  • Individual coaching interviewing, negotiating, resumes, cover letters, etc.

 

University Courses Taught


DeVry University, Keller Graduate School of Management
 
Career DecisionsConsumer Behavior

Leadership & Organizational Behavior

Quality and Performance Excellence  

International Business

Business Planning (Capstone MBA class) 

Psychology 110

Employment Law  (Compliance Issues )

The Legal, Political and Ethical Dimensions of Business

Change Management

Human Resource Planning (Capstone MBA class)

Negotiation Skills


 

Lincoln Law School:  The Psychology of Practicing Law
  

Stanford University, Continuing Education: Conflict in the Workplace

 Books - Published  

Leading and Managing in a Global Economy -                   Super Star Press 

Conflict in the Workplace:  Causes and Cures                  Robertson Publishing Co.

 

The following books can be ordered directly: www.ProductivePublications.com  


Training Your Board of Directors:  A Manual for the CEOs, Board Members, Administrators and Executives of Corporations, Associations, Non-Profit and Religious Organizations.  

 

The "Please" and "Thank You" of  Fundraising for Non-Profits:  Fifteen Essential Ingredients for Success.


 

Proformative Courses you can Upload and Purchase

 

Change:  The People Side

Effective Workplace Negotiation.

Ethics and Attitude in the Workplace.

Interviewing:  The Art & Science

 

The Pros and Cons of Leading a Virtual Organization

Today's technology enables us to work anywhere in the world and to communicate with each other in a variety of ways.  On the face of it it would seem that this is the ideal situation.  Employees can work from their homes, or at the beach for that matter.  Employers have less overhead because they don't have to maintain office space for each and every employee all the time.  In most cases accountability can be maintained by setting and meeting goals - having deliverables.

But, one of the things we've learned from research conducted at Stanford, is that when people are not working where they can see each other they tend to believe they are working harder than the next guy.  

A Stanford researcher (whose name I've forgotten) had a group of graduate students working on a joint project separately. Since they were working without seeing each other work, most of them started grumbling that they were working harder than their fellow workers.  When the researcher put cam-recorders in their cubicles, such that they could actually see each other working either in real time, or when they chose to look in, the grumbling ceased. 
 
There is less trust and less respect when we don't see each other face-to-face.
I've long been aware of the importance of the informal, spontaneous, and impromptu conversations and encourage my clients to create open spaces that encourage people to chat with each other.  In his book Jamming, Professor Kao who traveled the world described many places that designed spaces for the interaction of others.  Creativity happens in the spontaneous.  

Bruno Bettleheim wrote about the in-between spaces used by children when they were thinking, or under stress.  It is a similar concept.

So, one of the most important ingredients to organizational and individual growth, is the ability to get together with others informally to "chew the fat", share an idea, brainstorm together - and to create the next great thing.  Or, equally important, to discover that a project in the design phase was really a bad idea and should be squashed.

People who are working apart from each other and only come together for an hour or two on the phone in their formal weekly or monthly meeting miss out on these opportunities.

Too, management is less able to interact encouragingly, to see what is going on, to evaluate who needs some extra help, or to do any of those empathic things we talk about as so important in leaders and managers.

The bonding that is necessary for extra-ordinary team work is far less likely to occur when people aren't working in near proximity to each other.  Just one story - a group of employees were working together in a small area.  Two additional people were added to the group and management determined that the space was getting too crowded.  Intending to have a positive outcome, three members of the group were moved to a space across the hall.  Yes, directly across the hall.  These three people became the outsiders in just a very short amount of time.  They were not seeing each other constantly, and the opportunities to chat informally disappeared.  Now, they needed to actually get up and go across the hall. 

Talking on the phone gives us some clues.  E-mail almost none.  Face-to-face meetings are the most valuable of all and when we have virtual organizations that is what we lose the most.

I strongly suggest my clients who have mostly virtual organizations - or those who are managing groups of people in other areas - other countries - find time to bring people together.  If possible do it quarterly.  If that's much too costly or too difficult, at least do it once a year.  Allow plenty of time for the informal socializing during those retreats.

When I work with my CEOs to set up agendas for retreats we balance work-related content, with social time and also allow time for recreation and rest.

Bringing people together and allowing them to get to know each other personally significantly increases morale, trust, productivity, motivation and creativity.  It is worth the time and price.
 
Let me be your AUFIN - Adviser to Kings

Thank You from a Satisfied Client
Hi ArLyne
It was a pleasure meeting with you after nearly 4 years to avail your services in negotiating a better compensation package for a direct employment at a well established health care company in the bay area...

You understood the offer and my situation thoroughly and compiled a response that provoked thought in the recruiter and hiring manager minds that [showed them] I was the perfect candidate and they can't afford to lose me.  Your ability to articulate and present a counter-offer helped me get an additional 20K, which is close to 15% higher than the original base salary offered.  I am glad to have called you.  Your 1 hour consulting fees helped me gain $20K and I thank you for your time and exceptional service.

I look forward to availing more of your services in the future.  Especially, developing my negotiation and leading skills.... Once again thank you very much.   Signed:  Sasi Poruri

ArLyne Diamond, Ph.D                                               .ArLyne@DiamondAssociates.net   
Diamond Associates   3567 Benton St., #315, Santa Clara, CA 95051    408-554-0110