February 28, 2014

   Reporter: Rich Shearer    Editor: Ron Brown  & Rich Shearer   Photographer: Leander Hauri                   

President:  Hays Englehart 2013 - 2014          

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Mark talks faster (and funnier) than Shearer can write.

Mark Larks had one of his patented "Top Ten Lists" for us today, but this reporter can't write that fast and was laughing too hard in any event.  Maybe next week? 

VISITING ROTARIANS

Alicia Cragholm - Lafayette

GUESTS OF OTHER PERSUASIONS

Agatha Sue Lee - Cal's beloved

Conrad Breece - He'll never show up on this list again for reasons discussed below

Joan Breece - Conrad's beloved

BIRTHDAYS, ANNIVERSARIES, AND OTHER MISCELLANEOUS GOODIES

Smilin' Alex had good reason to smile.

Alex Arnold had a birthday, celebrated over five days in the mountains with the Speichers. A pair of "glassy babies" and a $100 emolument paid by Chuck Bove somehow played a part in the festivities. Hey, we report it, but don't ask us to explain it.

FUTURE VISION FOLLOW-UP

Our Despot, scheming away.

Hays Englehart, this year's Scheming Despot, asked that the participants of the recent Future Vision workshop send him the action plans that the participants drew up in time for discussion at the next Board meeting. Getting these to him by this Friday's meeting should be enough lead time.

I guess he was serious about all the stuff about which we bloviated that evening . . . .

THE COOPERAGE SHOULD BE OPEN

There is a new restaurant in town; The Cooperage, located at the old Petar's site on Lafayette Circle, more or less across the street from Chows. Its doors were scheduled to open for dinner on March 2, so stop by and say "hello" to the management.

VOCATIONAL MINUTE

Chris Lane, Mr. Liability.

Chris Lane was tapped by His Worshipfulness Hays to discuss what he does for a living. Chris works for Risk Concepts Insurance. He deals in liability insurance. He is also heading up our Motorama efforts and is heavily involved in trying to preserve the Park Theater. As to the latter, Hays gave his blessing for Chris to devote his efforts just as soon as Motorama is over.

OH, GOD, ANOTHER LAWYER?

Yes, Conrad Breece is a lawyer. And yes, he is Don Jenkins' friend. Those two strikes notwithstanding,

Our newest Rotarian.

he is also a good guy. As of this meeting, he is also a Rotarian, having been inducted with all due solemnity. His wife, Joan, was also here for the proceedings. Welcome to the Rotary family, Conrad and Joan, and a special welcome to the strange and wondrous collection of humanity that is Lamorinda Sunrise Rotary. We are delighted to have you.

A MESSAGE FROM THE PRESIDENT ABOUT LN-4 HANDS AND "EXPOSE YOURSELF" SPEAKERS

Jumping ahead a bit here, you may have noticed that President Englehart did not make the usual LN-4 hand presentation to Kevin Cragholm before he was hauled off to jail for Exposing Himself. His Excellency asked that you, the hoi-polloi, be informed that the mysterious organization known only as "The Board," has decided that "Expose Yourself" speakers henceforth shall not be honored with such a presentation. (It is this reporter's opinion that this is because Lamorinda Sunrise Members actually know what the thing is, which in turn removes the possibility of the speaker having a "whazzat?" look on their face during the presentation. And what's the fun of that?)

PROGRAM - KEVIN CRAGHOLM EXPOSES HIMSELF

Here are the two most important things we learned about Kevin Cragholm today: he is 38; and he thinks that is old. The Members in attendance had no reason to dispute the first, but heartily disputed the second.

Inspired by "The Education of Henry Adams," Kevin treated us to "The Miseducation of Kevin Cragholm," a highly entertaining review of his life and times.

Kevin's grandfather came from Denmark. The family name was "Hansen" at the time. "Hansen" is the Danish equivalent of "Smith" or "Jones," and Grandpa quickly tired of the resultant misdirected mail and other identity errors. He thus changed the family name to "Cragholm."

Kevin's father was a banker and entrepreneur. His Mom was a housewife from El Salvador who, research indicates, did not have a family name of "Hansen."

Dear Old Dad did petroleum banking for the Continental International Bank. When Kevin was two years old, the family moved to where the oil was, meaning Oklahoma.

When Kevin was 15 or so, oil went bust. Dad had to resign, and the family moved to California, where Dad went to work for Wells Fargo. Kevin became an Okie in Miramonte High. After a period of adjustment, he learned to fit in in that most American of ways - he could play football. In fact, football greatly influenced his decision to go on to UC Davis because he thought he could play there. He did that for two years until one day in practice when, as the result of literally being pulled in two directions at once, his shoulder decided to give a most painful combination lesson in physics and anatomy.

Which way are we going?

Kevin now had some choices to make. He had stressed football and more or less ignored academics as much as possible. He could continue that pattern, or he could devote middling attention to both, or he could focus on academics and de-emphasize football. He chose the last option and ended up as an Honors Student. (He didn't completely lose his football allegiance, however, as he proudly recounted that glorious September day in 2005 when UC Davis handed a bitter football defeat to that Junior University located over on the Peninsula.)

Since his graduation in 1998, Kevin has had a wide-ranging career, always in commerce and finance in some form. He first went to the Department of Commerce working in international commerce. He soon decided he wanted to go into a private-sector start-up. In the process, he got all his various securities licenses and started doing finance in a serious way. Three years later, the start-up was finished and down.

The next step was work as an investment analyst for a boutique securities firm, focusing on international securities. According to Kevin, "investment analyst" ranks somewhere below the janitor in the pecking order. He also worked a securities sales desk, putting lipstick on pigs, as the saying goes.

Becoming a hedge fund manager brought him back to San Francisco. The group he was with specialized in distressed assets. However, based on the state of the economy, just about everything was a "distressed asset," which made it much more difficult.

About this time, he had a business relationship with Wells Fargo, so in he goes to the Lafayette branch. He sees a lovely young bank officer. Her name was Alicia. It still is, only now she has added "Cragholm" at the end.

Time for Kevin to settle down, right? Not exactly. At this point, he headed off to Nashville to earn an MBA from Vanderbilt University. He and Alicia enjoyed their time there, with Kevin graduating in 2009.

Not long after that, Kevin got a call from the Federal Reserve Bank. They wanted him to come to work for them because of his unique experience. He started as a "creditor specialist," and he liked the people and the work. In due course, Kevin was asked to become a "Commissioned Examiner," which allows him to sign reports about the banks the Fed examines for financial soundness. That required about two years of course work and exams, a process that usually takes three to five years. This kept Kevin very, very busy and is a major part of why we didn't see as much of him as we would have liked for the past few years.

Kevin noted that, as a bank examiner, "you get a reputation," accompanied by a slide of Darth Vader. The average bank president likely is not be very happy to see im, in part because the first five banks he examined were shut down. Kevin sees the Fed and what he does as wearing the proverbial white hat, as they are an important line of defense in making sure that bank depositors' funds are safe.