Guest Columnist Summer Wagner

One year after meeting my husband we were married. Seven-and-a-half months later he left for an eighteen-month deployment. Honestly, if you would have asked me back then what one of the most stressful factors of the deployment was, I would have said "my mother-in-law."

We have been together seven years, and married for six years with two kids. My mother-in-law and I have just recently had our first conversation about that first deployment. She told me it was all a whirlwind and she was left feeling like, "Hey, this has been my son for the last 24 years. Who are you to take over, and be the one he calls every night?" It has been a long time since that first deployment, and even though we are just talking about it now, I think I always knew she felt that way.

However, my views have changed. As it was happening I felt deeply crushed, misunderstood and confused. In my mind I had met my "life partner," and we were in it until the end. I have always loved and cherished my husband. I see now that even though I knew I would go to the ends of the earth for my mother-in-law's son, she may not have known the inner workings of my heart. Having become a mother of two beautiful children, I understand the fierce protectiveness you have for your cubs. No matter how old they get.

We are now ten months into our second deployment, and if you asked me today who has been one of my biggest supporters, I would say my mother-in-law. You may wonder why I am now possibly opening a can of worms - the answer is because I have experienced firsthand the effects of a stressful mother-in-law vs. daughter-in-law scenario. And I have also experienced the effects of a loving and supportive mother-in-law vs. daughter-in-law relationship. Bottom line, it's important! Loving your husband's mother is one of the greatest gifts you can give him. Being at odds with your mother-in-law is not only stressful, for both you and her, it's extremely stressful for your husband.

- Summer Wagner is the wife of Staff Sgt. Ryan C. Wagner

3M, proclaimed a Yellow Ribbon Company in 2009, was one of 15 companies to receive the Secretary of Defense Employer Support Freedom Award on September 22. These companies received the award for providing outstanding support to their employees who are members of the Guard and Reserve, going above and beyond federal requirements.

Ian Hardgrove, 3M senior vice president of marketing and sales, accepted the award at a ceremony in Washington, D.C.

"Everyone at 3M is supportive of military employees," said Maj. Carl Fassbender, a 3M employee, "from the top leaders who championed the Military Support Network down to supervisors and coworkers providing personal support to help Servicemembers and their families throughout deployments."

3M will be celebrating their recognition at a ceremony in Maplewood later this month.

"This is the fifth company from Minnesota to receive this award. I believe every employer who receives a Freedom Award receives it on behalf of all employers that go above and beyond for their employees," said Paul Monteen, chair for the State of Minnesota Employer Support of the Guard and Reserve (ESGR).

"These employers not only go the extra mile during deployment but, likewise in the pre- and post-deployment period," Monteen  continued. "Most recognize their Guard and Reserve Servicemembers and veterans as valuable assets to their organizational family throughout their employment."

Monteen was recently named Chair for the State of Minnesota ESGR for a second consecutive term.

Terry Branham knows the needs of a Servicemember. With 26 years of service in the Army, Branham retired and got involved with the Yellow Ribbon Program at Hosanna Lutheran Church in Lakeville, Minn. in 2009. He and his wife, Barb, became the coordinators of volunteer activities.

Last spring members of the church met with National Guard leaders and expressed the desire to adopt Soldiers in deploying units and host deployment ceremonies - so that's exactly what happened. They ended up adopting three units that deployed in May of 2011, set to return in May 2012.

Hosanna held three luncheons for deploying Servicemembers. During the celebrations, families and Servicemembers were paired for the Adopt a Soldier program. The 24 Soldiers that wanted to be adopted had their pictures taken with the families so they would both have pictures of each other during the deployment.

In addition to taking care of the deployed Soldiers, Hosanna Lutheran Church connected with the families left behind, and 50 of them requested support. Of those 50, Hosanna will adopt eight of them from the cities of Lakeville, Apple Valley, Rosemont, Burnsville and Elko. They've pledged to help with lawn maintenance, fall cleanup and snow removal. The other 37 families were turned over to the other Yellow Ribbon Networks.

"The neatest thing is that families literally adopt other families," said Branham. "A father and son will do yard work while the mom is getting involved with the other mom. They become an extension of the family and remain so, long after the return of the Servicemembers."

Many Servicemembers are now paying it forward.

"Soldiers that return become volunteers themselves," Branham said. "At least a half-dozen in the past six months have come forward saying, 'The program took care of my family, and now I want to do it for someone else.'"

Since 1918, 17 graduates of Rosemount High School (RHS) have lost their lives while serving in the United States military in warzones across the world. On Friday, October 7, prior to the high school's homecoming game, those fallen heroes were recognized for their courage and selflessness.

Plans for the ceremony were set in motion when Jill Stephenson, mother of Cpl. Ben Kopp, killed in action in Afghanistan in 2009, approached RHS principal John Wollersheim. Stephenson wanted to present the school a plaque with the names of all Rosemount graduates who paid the ultimate price, dating back to World War I. Wollersheim, an active volunteer within Rosemount's Yellow Ribbon Network, liked the idea and preparations were soon underway.

The end result was a half-hour ceremony coordinated by the Rosemount Network and the Wounded Warrior Project. Soldiers of the 34th Infantry Division's "Red Bulls" were on hand, as well as a few 10th grade students who marched out and unfurled a huge flag across the field. The school's marching band and choir performed and Stephenson, accompanied by the parents of Andrew Wilfahrt, another Rosemount Servicemember killed in Afghanistan, presented the plaque to Wollersheim. The plaque will be on display in the school's trophy case.

"It was truly inspiring," said Master Sgt. David Denton, Rosemount's yellow ribbon outreach coordinator.

Denton was joined on the field by the Rosemount Mayor and Commanders of the local VFW and American Legion, one of which said, "Never in a million years did I expect to be on a football field, during homecoming, and witness something like that."

The Central Minnesota Warrior to Citizen Initiative (W2C), the name for central Minnesota's Yellow Ribbon Network, is making it easy for community members that want to help Servicemembers and military families.

Until November 11, you too can help W2C reach their goal of raising $11,000 by contributing $11. Of course, donations in other monetary amounts are appreciated.

W2C chair Anita Harris said the idea came from members of the Central Minnesota Network with the hopes of raising substantial funds to help the military community.

"People want to help," Anita said, "and they don't know how they can. But if they can give $2 or $5, they can be working for a greater cause."

Money raised will go to help with predeployment, deployment and reintegration support, community education and other local events for the 9 cities in the W2C Network. To contribute to the $11/11 effort, mail your donation to:

Anita Harris

Regional Office, St. Cloud

Midtown Office Complex

3400 1st. N., Suite 400

St. Cloud, MN 56303-4000

Outstanding volunteerism recognized

Throughout the 2011 season, the Minnesota Twins recognized Yellow Ribbon Volunteers that go above and beyond in their community. This summer several nominations of outstanding volunteers were received for recognition by the Twins at Target Field. In September, that distinction went to Jon Lindstrand of Kandiyohi. He received four tickets to the September 20 game, and during the pregame ceremonies Jon was brought onto the field as the following script was read over the PA system: