Spiritually Evolving to Become High Maintenance

I didn't use to be high maintenance, but I am today. I am proud I have been able to attain this level of evolution in my relationships. I am not there 100% yet, but I am much further along than I was ten years ago. I sense your confusion. I'm sorry, do you still believe being high maintenance is a bad thing?

What Is High Maintenance?
Generally speaking, high maintenance is a term invented by men to describe their emotional frustrations in communicating with women, and generally the most important woman in their lives. Instead of energy coming out like "Help me understand your point of view," the male mind converts, redefines, and categorizes this confusion as "There is something wrong with you."

I think we all know there are differences in how men and women communicate emotionally, so let's not take a position on the male emotional communication process just yet. Relationships are all about Yin-Yang. This article is about you overcoming this communication obstacle.

The Literal Definition of High Maintenance

Here is a definition for high maintenance I found online from Wiktionary, a content dictionary:

1. Describes a system which requires a high degree of maintenance to ensure proper functioning and without which it is likely to break down.

2. A person who requires a lot of attention. "He has this incredibly high-maintenance girlfriend; if he doesn't tell her that he loves her every five minutes, she tends to break down into hysterical depressive weepy fits."

You can't tell me a man didn't write that. Men generally work on machinery, and if a woman has any type of communication exchange that can be deemed as "hysterical depressive weepy fits," she must be high maintenance. Or PMSing, which is an article for another time. Men have found a way to understand and justify female communication by associating their functionality with machinery.

For the rest of this article, let's use "hysterical depressive weepy fits," as the term to define female emotional communications. If your male, I hope by the end of this article you will realize how silly your notion of high maintenance is. If your female, I hope by the end of this article you realize how silly it is to yield expressing and communicating your feelings. Let's try and understand each other.

Resolution Begins by Seeing Both Points of View
As simple as men sound in this example, their tactic (one might even call it a solution) is successful. Women hate to be labeled as high maintenance. They may not think of it as being high maintenance as much as they would feel emotionally rejected for trying to share relationship energy.

In 15 years of experience, women that come to me with communication issues are not coming to solve them. They are coming to confirm if their partner is all wrong for them. I hope all the men out there take notice just how important emotional communication to women. The path of least resistance for a man is to dismiss emotional communications. For women, the path of least resistance is to dismiss the man.

The path of least resistance is usually a Temptation. After all, evolving your soul is not supposed to be easy, and the only way you can evolve your soul is through your relationships. Temptation's only goal is to take you from the power of that light.

The Fear of Being High Maintenance

Once we get past the finger-pointing, and venting stage of spiritual counseling, the words I hear most are "I'm afraid of...." Fear of rejection makes people decide to withdraw from expressing who they really are. After a long period of withdrawal, it becomes time to consider withdrawing from the partnership.

Withdrawing the energy that makes up your soul has a direct effect on your relationship. The idea of evolution is to share that energy. The energy you invest in your relationships defines your future path of destiny. If you withdraw, what do you expect to get back in return? The universe doesn't care what kind of energy you invest, it only creates your environments based on your energy, like a mathematical formula. Easier said: Garbage in, garbage out.

High Maintenance Is Being Who Are
When I advise a person, I am quick to point out that I am advising just them, and their soul, not their partner. My interest is only getting their soul back on track, and on the path of spiritual growth. I take the partner totally out of the equation. Understanding this is a big step towards your solution. In theory, you created your environment. Your partner is part of that creation, as is the energy you get back from your relations.

If you wish to have an emotional communication with your partner. Simply do so, but prepare your partner for an exchange. Do not fear the outcome because you cannot create an outcome as good as the universe does. There is a Spiritual Wisdom that says: "What you fear becomes your reality." Why does always seem to happen? Because that is what you are investing your energy into, and the universe is only giving you what you have asked for.

Forget about fear. Get back to being able to be who you are, not withdrawn, or what someone else wants you to be. Your new goal is to be better than who you are today, and if you don't practice, and invest energy to achieve that outcome, how will you ever become better? One might even say higher evolved.

Be The Higher Version of Yourself
They Say: "You should dress, not for the job you have, but for the job you want to have." This spiritual wisdom also applies to relationship communications. Suppose you were to communicate a "hysterical depressive weepy fit," with an introduction of a goal you wish to attain? Something like:

"I have this intense emotional feeling I want to share with you. It is not directed at you, I just want to be able to share what I am feeling and vent a little. I am not looking for an immediate solution, but I do wish to communicate my emotions with the closest person in my life. Can you give me a few minutes of time to try and understand my point of view?"

The idea is to state your goal to your partner (and the universe) before you invest energy to achieve it. Obviously, you should know what the goal is before you try to communicate it. By doing it this way, you are telling the universe how you want your energy returned to you. Then you are making an investment of energy to achieve that goal. Keep the subject all about you, and your soul, for this is how your soul evolves.

Are Men As Emotionally Evolved As Women?
If you are a woman and answered "No" to that question, you are being as judgmental as a man that thinks a woman is high maintenance. Have you ever watched men at a sporting event or a competition? Screaming, yelling, cheering, high-five's all over the place? The next time you do see men at a sporting event, imagine them being as passionate about your relationship as they are about their team.

This is not an impossible task, if you learn how to harness the energy you have inside you, instead of withdrawing from it. Maybe, that can even be a goal for you.

Work on being high maintenance!

Love and light,

Jordan Canon