In moments of doubt, especially with God's presence with us, we are taught to turn to prayer. When we seek Him with all our heart we will find Him, says the Lord.
"When you call me, and come and pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you will find me. Yes, when you seek me with all your heart."
Don't you just wish that at this very moment
all your doubts are removed, your prayers are consistent, and you will never ever lose hope in the Lord?
Wouldn't it be nice knowing that today
-- you are at peace with your decisions, know in your heart you are doing the right thing, and accept your current station in life?
The past few weeks I have witnessed, as well as heard from friends and acquaintances, who, in their own admission could use some rest -- some much needed respite even if just for a short while. I am not talking about the kind of rest you get after several good nights of sleep. I am talking about the kind of rest from stress that comes from constant worries.
My friends are constantly worrying because they love "so much". There are friends who are care takers for loved ones, acquaintances who are patiently guiding their children back to the faith, friends at wits end trying to make ends meet, etc. It is admirable to know most of my friends have accepted their current station in life. They wouldn't dream of not taking care of sick or aging parents, give up on family members estranged from God, or abandon the family because the situation is hard -- in short, they are doing the right thing and are at peace with their decisions.
But here's the problem. Life is not made any easier even when you have accepted your current station in life, even if you are at peace with your decision, and not lacking in prayer and in hope.
The demands of life continue, and hard as we try we can't help but being worn out. It seems being at 'peace' with your current situation doesn't automatically gives spiritual or mental 'rest'.
When you have come to the juncture where you are doing everything you need -- you have accepted things, are praying constantly, and have not lost hope, where else do you turn when you can't find moments of rest? There seem to be that 'something' in the chest that just won't go away. No matter how much we love, we still break down. We are all too human after all.
Last week I have to say I felt I had nowhere else to go. I knew I made the right decision running Catholic World Mission
. I have written to hundreds of donors, increased my prayers, but I still can't get rid of the constant worry how we are going to support so many children and families in need. There's a chapel to be built in Puebla, students waiting for scholarships and supplies in our Mano Amiga schools, evangelizers to support, families starving in Kenya, and people needing medical care in Ghana just to name a few. I kept asking is there anything else we can do to get the urgency and magnitude of the need to our donors? The summer months have been hard on us, and the people we support.Catholic World Mission
's situation hasn't changed much this week. We are still waiting for much needed donations and I am still praying many donors will remember God cannot be outdone in generosity. But the 'knot' in my chest from constant worries is almost all gone!
I happened upon a prayer from Julian of Norwich (Christian mystic 1342-1416), which made me believe all shall be well -- that things will work out. I started remembering the times when God has answered my prayers. I noticed the more I focused on 'prayers already answered', the more the knot in my heart was disappearing. I read lessons from the Psalms where people started complaining to God for all their troubles only to be delivered from them when they started remembering what God has done for them in the past. I read and re-read Julian of Norwich's prayer. My prayer turned from one of 'asking' for His help to one of 'surrender'. I allowed myself to believe there are things beyond my control. I simply kept still and remembered who He is -- God. God was, is and will be there for me in spite of my current situation. In spite of the challenges, there's still much to be thankful for.
Here's part of Julian of Norwich's prayer. I hope this helps you as much as it did me. I thank God in advance for whatever assistance you can extend. God bless.