Are you in or Are you out?

Are you in or Are you out?

Greetings!

Every week we receive lots of prayer intentions from friends and supporters of Catholic World Mission. There are occasional prayers of thanksgiving, prayers for spiritual growth, and lots of prayers for healing and comfort for the sick and dying. Every week I separate the prayer intentions into groups, assign them into specific decades, and offer them one by one to the intercession of the Blessed Mother as I pray the rosary. I envision the people who made the requests, and I sense their joys and sufferings. It's hard not to be emotionally affected.

There is a specific type of prayer requests that comes every week, which particularly pains me.

Every week, someone, - a parent, brother, sister, spouse, would ask to pray for a loved one or a family member who is estranged from the faith. As a husband, a parent, and someone studying to be a deacon of the Church I can't help but be emotionally connected to this type of prayer request. I imagine the pain being carried by mothers or fathers, husbands or wives, brothers or sisters, praying arduously for loved ones to come back to God. For months now I wanted to write something to our friends at CWM, to offer something, anything.

I have had numerous conversations with friends who were once estranged from the faith. Without exception they tell me the same thing: they blamed everybody and everything. The curious thing is that they never blamed themselves or even considered their part in their decision. They stubbornly held to the belief they were justified in their decision, and the one fault they use for justification is sufficient to ignore the thousands of good work and blessings abounding all around. My friends all said they busied themselves with everything of this world except anything that may be considered as directly linked to God or his Church. The sad part is, hard as they try, they knew deep down something is missing. Many were afraid to take the time to examine themselves. All of them busied themselves to drown out "what was missing".

"The unexamined life is not worth living." - Socrates, in Plato, Dialogues, Apology

Brian, one of my friends, was already 78 when he finally said he received the grace to open his heart and turn back to God. He recalled the years of bitterness and the lost years with sadness. He was also grateful he still had the chance before, in his words, "it's too late". You see, Brian couldn't find Jesus all those years because he was afraid to look deep down into himself! He was afraid of what he would find, what he would have to answer to, what will be asked of him by Jesus if he were to take the time and examine his very being. And so he busied himself, tried to ignore the nagging feeling inside, hoping it would go away. But God had other plans.

"Was there a spectacular moment that changed everything for you?", I asked. His answer surprised me.

He said someone asked him to go back to church one day and for some reason, he felt open to it. Things didn't change with that first church visit as one might imagine "There was no instant miracle", he said. He went back to church for the first time in 27 years, decided to go another time, then another, and before he knew it, he was starting to hear the Lord again. Henri Nouwen's message came to mind when I heard this story.

"The farther I run away from the place where God dwells, the less I am able to hear the voice that calls me the 'beloved', and the less I hear that voice, the more entangled I become in the manipulations and power games of the world." - The Return of the Prodigal Son, Henri Nouwen

Brian also added, "I do not doubt the prayers of my wife all those years also had a lot to do with my return to church and my newfound relationship with the Lord!"

Yes, my friend Brian was lost. He was outside of his very self and so he couldn't find the Lord in the deepest sense of the word. Brian wouldn't find peace until he found the Lord again. St. Augustine said it best when he said, "our hearts will never come to rest until they rest in God." The Lord has always been there for Brian, patiently waiting for his return. The Lord wanted nothing more than happiness for Brian, to give him life, a life that is full and bears much fruit. Every parent, husband, wife, sibling who prays for loved ones estranged from God or the faith understands.

This week I will be receiving the list of prayer intentions. I know I will see many asking to pray for loved ones estranged from God or the faith. I wish to offer words of encouragement to my brothers and sisters in Christ. "Keep praying!" God works in mysterious ways and some day, in His time, and with His grace, he will use someone or something to reconnect with the person you are praying for. Know that your loved one is never really far from the Lord. He remains inside of each and every one of us whether we acknowledge Him or not. He remains in us always, even when we choose to be outside of ourselves. The Lord said so himself:

John 15:4 "Remain in me, as I remain in you. Just as a branch cannot bear fruit on its own unless it remains on the vine, so neither can you unless you remain in me."

Thank you for helping us spread the message of Christ throughout the world. This has been very difficult times for us. We rely on your generous support to continue doing God's work. God uses all of us to change the world, and to make a difference in someone's life. Together, we will help those who are still seeking to understand the deeper meaning of this question: Are you in or are you out?

I join you in prayer for those who feel on the outside of faith - while the Lord patiently and lovingly waits for their return.

Yours in Christ,