"Your body is not separate from your mind so much as it is a reflection of it.  As you change your mind, you change every cell in your body.  Such thoughts as I am fat, I am ugly, and I hate my body are like commands given to your body to materialize accordingly.  If you think negatively about your body, your body will reflect your negativity.  If you think lovingly about your body, then your body will reflect your love.  And there is no such thing as a neutral thought.  What is not love, is an attack.  And what is love, is a miracle." - A Course In Weight Loss by Marianne Williamson

I used to be at war with my body.  I hated it, and I never spoke kindly to it.  It took me a very long time to realize that it was not my body's fault I felt the way I did, it was mine.  I abused it with bad food, lack of movement, and a whole long list of things that were anything but loving.  To diet from a place of self control is no different to me than looking at a child and saying "No, you may not have that cookie.  You are fat and ugly and you must be deprived of treats."  That type of deprivation will never work for long, and even if it did, it is abusive.  There is another way.

Imagine if you loved and respected your body so much that it was hard to imagine putting junk into it ever.  Every choice, whether it was dinner or a cookie, was not an act of war against it but was an act of self care.  What would that look like?  I think it would be different for everyone, but I know what it feels like.  It is peaceful.  It is fulfilling.  It's not a battle.  It is not self-sabotaging.  The problem is how to get there when you are stuck feeling bad about the body you have right now.  Here are a few small things you can start with and then watch as your mind begins to change.

Learn to accept every single compliment you get.  Smile and say thank you.  That's it.  Do not argue, do not go on and on about what a long way you have to go, just receive.  Learning to receive is a very important step in changing the way we think.  And we must change the way we think to make changes that last.

Find one thing that you like about your physical body and focus on that every day.  If you like the color of your eyes, then when you are getting ready in the morning look in the mirror and acknowledge those beautiful eyes.  Say thank you out loud for them.  Flutter your eyelashes and make a big deal about them for just a few moments.  If you start to hear things like "those eyes would sure look better if I lost 50 pounds" or something cruel like that, say "No!".  Do not allow it.

Find one thing about your body that is responding to your fitness and celebrate it.  I notice that some of you have developed amazing arms.  I mean, your arms and shoulders look incredible to me.  Muscular, lean, strong.  Find words of victory to describe them and use them often.  Say to yourself as you are working out, or getting dressed, or driving to work, "my arms are strong".

Stop cursing the parts of you that you don't like.  These parts of you are PARTS OF YOU.  They don't respond well to being bullied, being called names, or made fun of.  They are a reflection of something that is hurting on the inside.  They are a reflection of choices you've made in the past that were not rooted in love.  Being judgmental and critical of these parts of you will only keep you stuck.  Freedom is found in finding ways to receive love for every part of you.

When you catch yourself bullying any part of yourself, picture the most adorable but dorky or different kid that you can imagine.  Maybe it is someone you love, maybe it is your younger self.  But picture this child being spoken to that way and see his or her little heart breaking under those words.  And immediately, as soon as you catch it, change those words to loving words of truth.  "You are beautiful just the way you are!"  "You are an amazing creation."  "You are perfect in every way!"  Then watch that little smile just light up.  That's your heart.

I believe that these small changes can have a huge impact on our hearts and minds.  We don't deserve to be punished for the rest of our lives for having struggled.  We've all struggled.  Accept forgiveness and begin to live a life rooted in love, especially when dealing with yourself.  There is nothing you've done that your body won't forgive you for.  It has an amazing ability to heal, to renew.  It is constantly reaching for health, despite our best efforts to damage it.  Take a leap of faith and begin to work on your mind instead of your body.  Accept every compliment, develop gratitude for something about your body that you like, celebrate your fitness accomplishments, and stop being a bully.  Once your mind is healed, your body will reflect that peacefully and the war will be over.  You will be free.

Now get moving.