Motivation
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We all battle.
Thursday evening: Getting ready for bed but I'm up after 10. I just made plans with two friends to meet at spin class at 6 AM. I know if I tell them I'll be there, I'm much more likely to actually go. I go to bed feeling motivated and on track. I ate well this week. It helped having food prepared. I ate all the chicken chili. It was good.
Friday morning 5 AM: The alarm rings. Are you serious? I look at the clock, look at the dogs who hardly move, look back at the clock. All I want to do is go back to bed. A few clients are away this morning so I don't have to be at the studio until 10:30 AM. I can sleep for four more hours. Or I can get up and go spin. I reset the alarm for 5:10 and burrow under the comforter.
Friday morning 5:10 AM: The alarm rings again. I shut it off and swear out loud. I sit there while a battle rages in my mind. Sleep would feel so good right now. Four more hours! But remember how you felt after spinning last week? Remember the feeling of accomplishment? The good sweat? How you talked after class about what a great way it was to start the day? I get up, go straight for the coffee, and make it to class.
Friday morning 6 AM: Spin class. One hour. 562 calories burned. Average heart rate 140. Max HR 164. Sweat my booty off.
Friday morning 7 AM: Spin class done! Feel like Superwoman! Not one bit sleepy. So thankful I did not shut off the alarm and go back to bed. Feel good about myself, proud I worked so hard. Carry this feeling with me all day and evening. Put on a dress that night that normally would not feel totally confident in. Rocked it! I love my life.
Friday night Midnight: Get home from event. Very tired. Not feeling totally prepared for 12 mile walk at 7:30 AM. Did I really also plan a 12 mile run after that? Do I really need to do the full marathon this year? What the heck for? Drink water. Drink water.
Saturday morning 6:30 AM: The alarm rings. Are you serious? I could cancel the group walk. The girls would understand. I'm way too tired to do this today. Why do I schedule these things so early? Then I remember what a nice morning it's supposed to be. 50's and clear. I get up, chug coffee, and the more awake I am the more excited I get about a long walk. I love this path. I love the group of women. Let's go!
Saturday morning 7:30 AM: Twelve miles! Everyone does great. Perfect weather. 3 hours, 1120 calories burned. This is what we've been working towards all summer. The 1/2 marathon is three weeks away. I am so excited to see everyone cross the finish line.
Saturday morning 10:30 AM: I am starving. All I can think about is a bagel with cream cheese. I know I planned to run 12 miles after the walk, but I just don't feel like I can do it today. Too hungry, too tired. I am going to eat then go home and go straight to bed for a long nap. But a little ache starts in my gut. Three weeks til the marathon. If I want to do the whole thing, I have to do this training run. I decide I don't care about completing another marathon and drive to panera.
Saturday morning 10:45 AM: Sitting in the parking lot of the studio eating my bagel thinking about the marathon. Feel torn. How important is it to me? Why did I decide to do it this year? What does it mean? And I remember that it's not about being skinny or losing weight. This year I want to do the full marathon as a comeback from two years of being injured. A reminder that I may have setbacks but I can have comebacks, too. I want to do this. No one is making me. It's for ME.
Saturday morning 10:55 AM: Start out running. I tell myself that even a mile is a victory today. Just listen to the iPod and get through a mile. Then it starts feeling good. The music and the movement combine to make me feel free and alive. I keep going. After 5 miles running I start feeling very emotional. My physical defenses are about gone so I'm left with raw little ol' me. I call my friend who reminds me where my strength comes from. I power back up and run 6 more for a total of 11.
Saturday afternoon 1:15 PM: Done. 23 miles. Nothing left physically but so happy that I did what I asked of myself. Despite how hard I had to battle to get there. It was worth it. Every step was worth it.
Saturday afternoon 2:00 PM: Start one of the longest, most satisfying naps of my entire life. Life is good.
Now get moving!
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