Motivation
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On January 28, 1999 I quit smoking. I never thought I would succeed at quitting. I was working in my project management career at the time, and just starting to take some baby steps into a healthier life. I gained weight after quitting, and when I got measured for the dress for my sister's wedding, I'd had enough and committed to be in a size 14 instead of an 18 by the wedding.
I lived near Highbanks so I started walking there. I added some running here and there and the weight began to come off slowly. In February of 2002 I started working with Jud as my personal trainer. I had never done much strength training before and I really loved it. I felt like my body responded to it and I started feeling stronger.
In 2002 I also started working with a coach named Erika. I was very aware of how unhappy I was with my life and my career and I was searching for help. I tended to blame some of my unhappiness on my weight, but all the old feelings I had been carrying around were starting to bubble up to the surface. I felt lost and scared but unable to articulate those feelings.
One of the things that Erika did was to take me through a process to help me identify my core values. What's really important to me? What can't I live without? What makes me thrive? The outcome of the exercise was Clear. Rock. And Freedom.
What does "Clear" mean to me? It is the way I want you to communicate with me. It represents my desire for clear expectations. It's a deep desire to be open and honest, to be real, to live my truth. Even if it goes against the grain, or doesn't always win approval.
What does "Rock" mean? It is my need to have things built upon a solid foundation. It is self knowledge that I need a certain sense of security first, before jumping into risk. It is my need for God in my life. And it is my need to have solid relationships that I know can withstand anything.
What is "Freedom"? It's my need to have the world be open to me. In my career, that meant having the freedom to be self-employed, and to bring my authentic self to my work without having to put on a mask that I felt was often required of me.
The wonderful thing about knowing my core values is when I feel myself getting upset or anxious, I can pretty quickly figure out that one (or more) of my core values is being violated which allows me to think clearly about the situation and respond appropriately instead of responding immediately to my emotion and calling someone an asshole or being self destructive, like I used to.
I would have named my business Clear Rock Freedom Fitness, but it was just too long. But the freedom is still in there.
I know it may seem at times that you are stuck. Or not yet where you want to be. Unhappy with your weight. Discouraged. I understand. Just start taking those steps. Or the next steps. It may just be small steps at Highbanks, but you don't know where they will lead you. I certainly didn't, but I had a small part of me that always wanted to keep believing.
Find out what makes you happy and in love with life. It seems that very often we create a belief in our minds that says "when I get thinner, I will be happy". I promise you, it works the other way. Remember who you are, give yourself what you need to thrive, and the weight will take care of itself.
Now get moving!
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