Motivation
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Last week I said I would dive into the specifics of healthy eating; what to eat, when to eat, and why. This is a complicated topic because we are all unique, so what I am presenting here are my personal beliefs and my own experience in finding a personal formula that works for me. Here goes.
When you ask me what to eat, how, when, and why, I believe my answer must be a question which is, "Where are you now?". Learning to have a healthy relationship with food is a progression through various stages. Here is how I look at them.
Stage One- Stop the Bleeding
When I was just getting started, I felt very out of control. I had been gaining weight for some time, wishing I could change, and feeling very bad about myself. So I relate to women that come to me feeling like this. I believe at this stage, you need to get a little control back in small doable steps. Weight Watchers points or calorie tracking works well for this stage. Small successes are the key to turning things around.
A 250 pound woman is probably eating between 2500 - 3000 calories a day to be gaining weight, so even cutting 500 calories a day can add up to big successes. Often, just the act of writing down what you eat and adding up the points or calories (I prefer calories) creates a new mindfulness that can lead you to the next stage.
If you feel like you are stuck in this stage and cannot get any control at all, I suggest you talk to someone about why your relationship with food has become so unhealthy.
Stage Two- Heal and Grow
I progressed very slowly through this stage because I had so much emotional stuff that needed to heal. I would come upon these long periods of plateau in my weight loss. I realize now that I never stopped working or progressing, I just couldn't see what was happening. Layers were being stripped away and I was deep into the reasons why my relationship with food had become so unhealthy.
There were times when I got so frustrated because it seemed like I was working out so hard and the weight wouldn't budge. But I was still learning how to not depend on food for emotional comfort, trying to get organized, trying to stop punishing myself, becoming more aware of what to eat and when, and getting out of the all-or-nothing diet mentality. As I progressed through these things, I became more honest with myself about what I was really eating and as that happened, more weight came off.
If you feel like you are stuck in this stage, I suggest you ask yourself what needs to heal or grow within you to move forward.
Stage Three- Optimize
This is the place where you've gotten through most of the emotional work and now are tweaking your lifestyle continuously. There may be times you are thinking about optimizing your body composition (body fat %), optimizing your performance, your health, or your confidence.
Once I progressed to this point, I began to think more about food in terms of how to fuel my body. I don't count calories anymore, I know for the most part what to eat, I know how to comfort myself without using food, I know how to forgive myself and move on when I have a bad day. In other words, I have finally developed a healthy relationship with food.
The personal formula that works best for me is what I call Never Too Hungry, Never Too Full. It comes mostly from The Eat Clean Diet by Tosca Reno. It is very simple. Eat correct portions of whole, fresh foods often enough to send the signal to your brain and body that nutrition is abundant- no need to store fat.
You may find you can "eat clean" about 75% of the time, which is great. If you want to progress to, say, a slightly lower body fat percentage, you may have to increase your clean eating to 85% of the time. I've found that my struggles here have to do with priorities. For example:
Which is more important to you; eating and drinking what you want in social situations or your body fat percent?
Which is more important to you; rewarding yourself with sweet treats or fitting into your skinny jeans perfectly.
I know from my experience I may be spending a lot of mental energy thinking about improving my body composition, but I haven't gotten brutally honest about eating clean when I am out with the girls on a Friday night.
If you are struggling at this stage, I suggest you ask yourself if losing that last 5 pounds or firming up that one last body part is worth making the changes that need to be made to get there. And if it is worth it to you, stop thinking about it and get serious about it.
What we should eat:
Small 300-400 calorie meals that combine lean protein with complex carbs, ensuring a wide variety of vegetables, fruit, whole grains, lean meat, fat free dairy, nuts, healthy fats, and water eaten frequently throughout the day. Never too hungry, never too full.
You know it when you eat the right thing because you feel great! No sugar highs and lows. Just good energy. Think about that apple slice with all natural peanut butter. Or a grilled chicken breast with steamed broccoli. A salad with avocado, almonds, and veggies. Yum.
We must send the signal to our bodies and brains that food, water, and nutrition is abundant. No need to store fat. Deprivation is not necessary. Once you fall in love with eating healthy, the junk doesn't have the same pull that it used to. Be aware of how many calories are in the foods you choose. Be aware of the reasons you eat. Be aware of portion sizes. Remember, shoot for progress- not perfection. There is no such thing.
Now get moving!
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