A dog's life seems simple - eat or sleep. Sometimes play. My dog occasionally expresses fear. Most of the time it's irrational. At least it seems that way to me. He's afraid of those inflatable decorations people put in their yards for the winter holidays. He's particularly afraid of the snowmen. I can't seem to get him to understand that they are not out to hurt him. Nor can I convince him that the neighbors walking on the sidewalk in front of our house, even the ones he knows and likes, won't hurt us. He's a bit protective of his imagined kingdom.

But, take him for a walk and he wants to sniff the ground for every animal that's walked that area in the past week. Dogs have the ability to distinguish 10,000 different scents, and it seems like every 10 feet he's found a new one. But, what does this have to do with improving your business?

In many ways we're a lot like dogs. Most of us would probably choose eating or sleeping over working. But we know we need to work in order to eat. We're probably not as curious as we could be and we know that some of our fears are truly irrational. We evolved but they remained a part of our instinctual heritage. As humans, however, we do have the advantage of being able to test those fears against reality. We can look at facts and probabilities and decide whether to allow our instincts to take over or to act logically after weighing probable outcomes. The wings on an airplane don't even flap but we willingly board and assume we'll land at our destination. That used to be an act of faith. Have you taken time to really examine your natural reaction to people and events?

If a competitor gets the client you were wooing is your reaction to fight back? After all, they're stealing your food! If a client complains about some aspect of your service is your reaction to justify what you did? That's the fight instinct welling up inside you. What if you took a step back and asked yourself: "How did we get here in the first place? What could I have done differently?" Our nature is to satisfy our urges, but that's only a temporary fix - in both senses of the word. We have the capacity to proactively decide on a course of action that will pay off not just once, but time and time again over the life of a relationship. We have the opportunity to choose neither fight nor flight, but instead choose to build relationships with our customers, our friends, and our families that will allow us to eat well for a long time.

The less time we have to spend worrying about finding food, the more time we'll have to play!

I just finished reading Marshall Goldsmith's book What Got You Here Won't Get You There. One of the most important points he makes is that if someone thinks you've screwed up it's almost impossible to convince them otherwise. The best approach is to apologize, say you'll try to do better, and then shut up. When was the last time you tried to argue with someone who was apologizing to you? You can't.

Remember how much fun it is to play? Everyone participates, no one wins or loses, everyone laughs. When was the last time you made it fun for your fellow networkers? Find a way to help people enjoy the experience - bring flowers, bring balloons, bring fortune cookies, bring magic tricks. Be fondly remembered!