Scott "Q" Marcus, Recovering Perfectionist
Greetings!,

Scott Q Head ShotIn case you haven't heard, we are living through "interesting times." (Really? No, I hadn't noticed anything Scott!)

When times like these land on our doorstep, we can either -- like a pill bug -- curl up in a ball and hope to avoid it; or we try new things. I tend to opt for the latter, rather than the former. Of course, the problem with trying something different is sometimes it doesn't work. Sometimes, you feel bad; even rejected as a person. So, we tend not to even try new things.


That's why I'm so excited about my  Special Guest Writer in This Issue!

I am so honored to have Dr. Elayne Savage agree to write a column for my newsletter this time. I originally met Elayne at the Northern CA chapter of the National Speakers Association (where I am presenting on May 2). I have been a member of the chapter (including past president) since 2003 and Elayne was one of the first people I got to know. Not only is she brilliant, but she's one of the kindest and warmest people you could ever hope to meet. She inspires and supports everyone around her and I know you will find what she has to say helpful.

Lots of Other Stuff For You Too

At the end of Elayne's column, there is information about:
  • The  International Inspiration Index with a survey you can take (click here to jump there)
  • My new magazine, Two Words (click here)
  • A great tip booklet to help you lose or maintain weight (click here)
That should keep you busy this month. Of course, if I can be of service to you in any way, don't hesitate to get in touch. Thank you for reading my newsletter.

Treat yourself special,

my signature
Scott "Q" Marcus
THINspirational Speaker & Columnist, Recovering Perfectionist

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A Special Note:  I am looking for writers for the magazine. If you would like to know more about writing for Two Words, please follow this link.
 
ElaynesArticleThe Fear of Trying
By Elayne Savage, PhD, the "Queen of Rejection"

Elyane Savage, PhDBy its nature putting oneself 'out there' involves the possibility of rejection. And rejection hurts. When I'm about to begin a new creative project, something holds me back. It's especially challenging when writing is involved. What a struggle it was to put out the first edition of my e-letter, 'Tips from The Queen of Rejection.'

Each time I challenge myself, I learn fascinating things about my relationship to Fear.

Tripping Over My Own Stumbling Blocks

I drag my feet. Every diversion that comes along sidetracks me. I even find myself sorting through stacks of papers and cleaning out file cabinets.

I'm tripping over my own stumbling blocks.

Why is starting a new project so difficult? Something is interfering, displacing anticipation, and eclipsing hope. Then I recognize the intruder.

It is Fear.

The Fear Team Roars In

The Fear Team comes roaring onto the field led by The Fear of Rejection and its evil twin the Fear of Failure. They're joined by the Fear of Success and the Fear of Being Visible. Warming up on the sidelines are the Fear of Disappointment and the Fear of Judgment and Criticism.

Make no mistake about it, however. Fear of Rejection is the team leader, the foundation for all the other Fears.

I hear voices in the background and stop to listen. The Fear Team brought along a rooting section. Well, that's OK. I can muster up my own pep squad.

Both sides try to out-shout each other: "You can't do it! You can't do it!" answered by "Yes, I can! Yes, I can!"

"I have lots to say on this subject!" "You have nothing to say!" "Lots!" "Nothing!" "Lots!" "Nothing!"

Opposing voices swirl around in my head. Conflicting emotions skirmish with one another.

The confusion makes me stressed and anxious. I become immobilized.

The Queen Calls a Time Out.

It's time to sort things out.  It's too hard to see options through this haze of confusion. When we're unable to make choices, we feel stuck. And when we're so immobilized, making choices becomes even more difficult.

This exhausting tug-of-war between the voices is ambivalence. It involves the presence of simultaneously conflicting thoughts, ideas or feelings.

Those Whispers and Roars of Ambivalence

For some folks the word 'ambivalence' means 'love and hate' or 'good and bad.' But there are many kinds of ambivalent feelings and thoughts.

When your internal voices start skirmishing with one another, this conflict leads to uncertainty and confusion.

The confusion creates anxiety. The anxiety causes freezing up, becoming immobilized. This degree of ambivalence surely isn't productive.

It takes a lot of energy to deal with these competing voices. Wouldn't you rather put your energy into something more creative?

By moving past the ambivalence, you'll be opening space for making choices.

5 Tips for Taming Ambivalence...

To read the five tips and to continue reading THIS article,  follow this link.

----- MORE ABOUT ELAYNE ------
Elayne Savage is a speaker, communication coach, psychotherapist, and author of
DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY! THE ART OF DEALING WITH REJECTION  
and BREATHING ROOM-CREATING SPACE TO BE A COUPLE
She can be reached at elayne@QueenofRejection.com or via phone at 510.540.6230  
Contact her for her complimentary e-Letter subscription

---
Other articles from Elayne can be found here. Her website is here and her blog is here.
Elayne's products can be found here.


CoolStuffOther Cool Stuff For You..

I3The I3 Survey is now Available to You
I keep meaning to start the "I3." Guess what, I did!  That's my hopefully clever name for the International Inspiration Index. Each month, I want to monitor how people are feeling; whether they're upbeat, depressed, excited, positive or negative. Over time, I think it will be an interesting thing to chart and each month I'll report to you what it's like. It's only four questions long. Very quick. Completely confidential.


Two Words Magazine
TwoWordsNew Glossy, Printed, Four Color, Motivational Magazine: Two Words
My new magazine, Two Words: A magazine dedicated to hope, inspiration, and change has finally come out. It's a project I've been working on for about a year and I'm very excited by the reaction it's received. I found some very talented writers for my first issue and I think that not only will you find the articles to be motivational but the magazine itself is beautiful -- if I do say so myself.



Weight Loss Tips
TipsBookTrying to Lose Weight -- or Keep it Off?
Over the five years that I've been writing my column (find older issues here), I have received tremendous advice and ideas from loads and loads of people. I finally decided to put many of those ideas into one place and came out with "151 Easy Things to do BEFORE you Give up on Your Diet." It's a quick tips booklet; fits in a #10 envelope and available for purchase in single units or multiples. I've been told lots of people pick a number between one and 151 each day, and simply turn to that tip for a suggestion.

  • You can download a truncated version of it by (right) clicking here.
  • You can order one (or many) copies by going to the bottom of this email.
GreatDealMagazines & Booklets

MagazineSpecialTwo Words Magazine Special Offer!
If you're looking for some motivation, you have come to the right place. Scott's brand new, glossy, four-color printed magazine comes out four times a year and each issue is chock full of great writing, designed to help inspire you, motivate you, and help you deal with change.

Each issue, several authors each pen 500-700 words on a common theme.  The first issue, "We Are,"  is now available -- at a discount through this newsletter.



TipsBookletSpecial151 Easy Things You Can Try BEFORE You Give Up On Your Diet!

If you're looking for some motivation, you have come to the right place. This simple, inexpensive booklet is so full of ideas, it'll keep you -- and your friends -- motivated for months to come. Order several and save a bundle!

Check out all Scott's products in one location -- with loads of special deals:
www.CompletelyInspired.com

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Complimentary Downloads For You:
Limited Edition eBook (pdf) of Scott's First 52 Columns
Shade of a Tree eBook