Golden Visions & Associations
Thought of the Week
Your Success Thought for the Week of August 13, 2008

Poise and Calm

A dead silence often fills the air when I ask my clients who they will be in an upcoming interaction in order to accomplish what they intend to accomplish. We are typically so focused on the goal of having others see things our way, to agree with our proposals or to sign on the dotted line, that we forget our role – the who we need to be in the matter.

Guest author Brad Ward, MD offers the following ‘Success Thought’ on this topic for your consideration this week:

I recently read “Golf is Not a Game of Perfect” by Dr. Bob Rotella. One of the major thrusts of the book was that when you are making a shot, only think of the target, whether that is a spot on the fairway at which to aim, or it is the left side of the cup on a putt. Avoid thinking of other distracting keys. Only think of the goal of where you are hitting.

Recently, I had an important and potentially confrontational meeting with some partners in my organization. Prior to meeting, I was thinking of the things I wanted to say, the points I wanted to make, as well as my positions on various issues. After speaking with Ann, I realized some of the tone I was using was potentially inflammatory, and that my tone would be counterproductive for progress at the meeting. I needed a different plan.

Similar to the golf game, I decided to simplify my approach to the meeting. I wrote down ten talking points - points that I wanted to make which expressed my positions. Some were absolute things I wanted to say, others were situational, meaning these would be responsive or retorts to other positions made by others. The biggest thing I did was to try and set the tone of my demeanor with a single word: CALM.

No matter what, I determined I would stay composed, calm, and, like the golf tip, remain focused on one goal. I was prepared for what I would say, but only had one thing to remember: be CALM.

I think that for meetings, confrontations, or even public speaking, a different keyword or words could be used for calm: firm, confident, humble, contrite are just a few. Various situations dictate what your tone should be.

Many years ago, I was watching a college football game on ESPN which had large bowl implications. The starting quarterback was a freshman who had played only sparingly, but was thrust into a starting role after the senior quarterback got injured. The young player played a good game, and his team won. The announcers praised him, relating how composed he was, and how he made few mistakes. On his right wrist was a flip band of all the plays to remember, but on his left wrist was a single word written down in bold letters. Late in the game, the cameras zoomed in on his left wrist, and clearly seen was his keyword for the game: POISE. This young player helped his team win their game with his focus by remaining poised on the field.

Thanks to Dr. Ward, you are invited to maintain your focus this week on your own demeanor, who you will be in order to win in your interactions. Let me know how it goes.

Enjoy your discoveries and have a grand week.


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P. S. We'd love to hear how you used our 'Success Thought of The Week' in your business or personal dealings.

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A Testimonial

" OUTSTANDING! I’ve already forwarded this week’s ‘Success Thought’ to several people I’m currently engaged with here in Lake Tahoe! Keep this great stuff coming.
~ Ron Miller, Ron Miller and Company, Sunriver, Or. "

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