On October 20, 2008, at the age of 42, I started my second set of earth locs. I call my locs interchangeably earth locs, garden locs, or Nubian locs - NOT dreadlocks. I believe that the terminology 'dreadlocks' forms a negative connotation. Because we are role models when we choose to wear our hair natural, we need to send a positive message when we refer to our hair in its natural state. Hence, there is nothing dreadful about our natural hair and locs.  By not using the word 'dreadlocks' we educate our race and other ethnicities about the beauty of our hair in its natural state. We also gain self-respect, self-actualization, and a positive self-image when we use positive terms to describe our natural hair.
 
My first set of earth locs was started on March 4, 2002, at the age of 36. A loctician started my locs, but I maintained my earth locs (uncultivated) myself for 4 1/2 years until I cut them off on September 6, 2006 (just past my 40th birthday). You may ask, what brought me to cut off my locs and wear an Afro for 2 years? A change in the direction of my journey and an inward journey of growth and self-acceptance had reached a culmination. Further, a second chapter (journey) of my life had begun that focused more on inner peace and being whom I wanted to be without compromising.

Why The First Earth Locs Journey Began

I went natural on October 27, 2001.  After having tried many times to maintain a natural state, I cut off my relaxer and wore a tiny Afro (TWA). Many things transpired up to Oct 2001 that guided my journey, but the wheels toward naturalness were in motion before September 2001.

I was actually natural for two months prior to my wedding and I was planning on wearing my hair natural for my September 2001 wedding because...well...I just wanted to be me and I loved how I looked with natural hair. A combination of my future sister-in-law saying "you really plan to wear your hair like that (meaning my Afro)", and nerves from the wedding created a feeling that maybe an Afro was not a good idea for the wedding. Consequently, I had my hair relaxed and weaved in July before the September wedding. The weave lasted for only two weeks before I cut it out because I hated the way I looked in it.

Next, I trimmed my freshly relaxed hair down to the "Halle Barry" short hairstyle and I hated that hairstyle too! The wedding was getting closer and I just could not think. In hindsight, I should have just cut my hair to the new growth and walked down the aisle sporting a closely cut Afro.

Well, after viewing the wedding and honeymoon photos, I wished I had sported a natural look. I was disappointed with how I let my sister-in-law's comments influence me when I should have stood my ground. I felt ashamed for submitting to the pressure, however, I had a renewed passion for my natural hair and I wanted to be free of the 'lie of lye'. Needless to say, I did not relax my hair anymore after July 2001.

I finally cut the remaining relaxer out on October 27, 2001 after months of letting my hair grow out. I cut my hair myself and shaved it for a sexy close cut. Now I was naturally free!  I read everything I could for four months and joined three natural hair website forums. I wanted to understand the history of locs, how to maintain locs, and when to start the locing process. Because I continued to trim my hair, when I did start my locs in March 2002, I only had about 1 inch of hair growth.


My First Loc Journey:

My first earth loc journey was to find out whom I was.  Although I thought I knew myself, I did not. My first earth loc journey was to learn how to appreciate myself by learning about inward beauty.

As a loc wearer, you learn inner beauty when the baby and teen locs go through a stage of "doing their own thing." Some people call it the "ugly stage," but I never saw it as ugly. It was a growing stage for my earth locs and for myself. As I grew inwardly I found out that I was too high maintenance in the past when I wore my hair with the lye. I had to have my nails done; my hair weaved and relaxed; and, I wore many wigs (I was the wig queen) because I was ashamed of my hair when it was time for a relaxer. When I look back on my permed, weaved, and wig pictures I see a "hot mess!"

Now I see myself as beautiful inwardly and even more so outwardly.  The inward beauty combined with my beautiful African crown of glory, shines brighter than the North Star! My husband has been a big proponent and supporter of me going natural. He encouraged me 100% when I made the decision and even surprised me by saying he loved me natural and asked me to never go back to perms.

My parents... they are a different story and still stuck in the mindset of a press-n-curl or relaxers. My dad did not speak to me for a while when I first started my locs and has not spoken to me yet (in 2 days) since my second set of earth locs began yesterday.  My 69 year-old mom however, has complimented me and has even asked me about locing. I hope to influence my mom to loc her hair even though my dad will give her a hard time. I want her to be free of perms and press-n-curls in her retirement days.

This is such a feeling of Freedom! Joy! Love! I want every black woman to experience this euphoria! I believe that black women in the entertainment arena are in an influential place to promote positive love for ourselves and our hair. However, there are so few black female entertainers (who wear their natural hair) that our young people can look up to. We still have a long way to go, and I will do what I can through Blogs and possibly books to boost love for our natural selves.


Chapter 2 The TWA And The Birth of My 2nd Loc Journey:

I cut off my first earth locs on September 6, 2006 when I believed that the first part of my self-appreciation and journey of self-discovery was done. I was ready for Chapter 2 of my journey, which was wearing my hair in a tiny Afro for 2 years. I believe when I wore my earth locs, I was focused on the length of my earth locs, which grew like weeds, rather than seeing other areas of growth that I was moving toward. Once I became obsessed with the length of my earth locs, I knew my journey of appreciation was over, and a new journey was starting to emerge.

Once I cut off my earth locs (I was 40 then), Chapter 2 of my journey involved body image. For some reason, I accepted my hair in its natural state as beautiful but I overlooked my body image. I still had issues that involved European standards. I was never a size 2 growing up in New Jersey, but through my mid 30s to 40, I was underweight at 110 lbs and a size 2. I always weighed around 125 to 130 at 5' 2", but I had some negative European standard ways of measuring myself as reflection of magazines and other media. I concluded that the skinnier I was, the more beautiful I was I was not anorexic or bulimic. I ate a lot, but I exercised too much. I would exercise 1-1/2 hours a day for 7 days straight...afraid to gain weight.

When I approached 40, my body's metabolism and curvature started to change. I became curvier and it took more exercise to maintain the weight. My curves looked good and my family and friends thought I looked better. I accepted my natural crowning glory as beautiful for 4 years, and now it was time to accept all of me as a beautiful black woman. Once I cut my earth locs in 2006, I immersed myself even more in body appreciation for Chapter 2 of my journey. I was not just centered on my earth locs since I cut my hair, but I also focused on the rest of me that I felt needed work. I made peace with myself and I am living in a peaceful state-of-mind.


Chapter 3 Starter Locs,10/20/08:

Consequently, my second earth locs journey has focused on maintaining peace and a peaceful state-of-mind as I finally learned to love ALL of me without the lye and the lie. Instead of uncultivated locs, this time I had Jey start and maintain them as a new chapter in my life journey begins.


~ Peace my natural sisters
Donna M Beaudoin