Now that you've discovered your personality style (Driver, Analytical, Amiable or Expressive) and you've learned about the others, what do you do?
Well, first, you start to use it to your advantage in developing relationships that could lead to more business!
When you're interacting with a prospect who is distinctly not your personality type, you'll notice some personal discomfort, frustration, or in some cases, even a touch of anger!
And here's the bad news: The same thing is more than likely happening to your prospect, too!
So, if both of you are uncomfortable, at least at some level, how do you begin to establish a good, productive relationship?
You do that by adopting your prospect's personality style by "matching and mirroring" it. Otherwise, the conversation will tend to be awkward and uncomfortable. (If you meet people who aren't your "type," it's likely that they're a different personality type.)
What is matching and mirroring? It's a process that allows you to create rapport and trust, largely based on nonverbal communication. A nearly 40-year-old study conducted by Dr. Ray Birdwhistle of the University of Pennsylvania, concluded that 93% of our communication is nonverbal (posture, facial expressions, tonality, physical gestures, eye movement, etc.). Therefore, according to this study, what you say is only 7% of the total!
Of the 93% nonverbal communication, 55% is said to be based on physiology and 38% on tonality.
Here are some of the things that you can match and mirror:
- body posture
- vocal tone or inflections
- pace, tempo or rhythm of speech
- loudness/softness
- breathing
- gesturing
- blinking
- speech patterns, phrases or preferred topics
The more that you can make your prospects be at ease with you, the more rapport and trust you will build. Over time and with practice, this should begin to get you more opportunities and more sales.
Next week, I'm going to walk you through a specific example of matching and mirroring.
Send any questions, comments, stories, or sales problems to
dan@optimumbizdev.com, and I'll personally send you a response!
LAST WEEK'S HOMEWORK: Did you notice how much you noticed yourself being an Expressive (if you are one), or did you notice others whom you suspect are Expressives? Did you notice how much fun they were having? Did you see them trying to become the center of attention or directly influencing others? That often happens with Expressives.
THIS WEEK'S HOMEWORK: For every conversation that you have this week, notice your nonverbal communication, and also that of others. Begin to experiment with matching and mirroring, but be careful: don't be too exaggerated or overdo it. You want your actions to be undetectable.
Please take a minute and let me know how you're doing out there. How have these tips been helping you?
