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 This time of year is often referred to as the "Season of Giving," and while some college students find ways to volunteer their time or to donate money or material items through campus programs, many do not. Your college student might also be missing out on participating in your family traditions of giving in which they were once involved. Interestingly, over the years, I encountered hundreds of students whose resumes reflected significant involvement in community service while in high school, but who then decided not to participate in college. I was always curious about this and students shared that they no longer participated in community service "because it wasn't required" or because they "got burnt out doing all that in high school." However, some students were genuinely motivated to volunteer or to give, usually because a cause or purpose truly resonated with them. I recall one student who shared that it was during this time of year that her family had often been on the receiving end of community giving. She went on to say that it felt good to be able to give her time at a local soup kitchen.
If your student does not seem particularly engaged in community service, and if it is a value that your family holds, then consider adjusting your family's schedule of giving or volunteering to continue to involve your student. When the calendar of community service just doesn't mesh with the life of your student, invite your student to develop his or her own traditions -- choosing something about which he or she genuinely cares.
A different world cannot be built by indifferent people.
-- Horace Mann, Philosopher
All the best in your parenting,
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| Second Thoughts: Making a Major Change |
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Mid-year, when one semester is ending and your student is existing between what was and what could be, you might notice your son or daughter expressing second thoughts about any number of decisions that he or she has made. Sometimes the doubts are about one's academic major, the pursuit of a particular career path, or whether or not the current college is a good fit. On one hand we only know what we know at the time that we make any decision -- and as we experience more of life it is natural to gain knowledge that informs our choices. Students can feel very frustrated when they have second thoughts about important academic decisions. Click here to gain tips and learn strategies for guiding your son or daughter as he or she experiences second thoughts. |
Talking about grades with your college student can feel like you are walking on thin ice -- and this presumes that your student will show you his or her grades or has given you access to his or her electronic academic record. 
