August 2009 Newsletter
Parenting Strategies
 
SuccessfulCollegeParenting.com
Greetings!
 
 
phot of Kay in gardenI guess Paul Revere didn't really shout "The British are coming!" -- as the whole idea of that mission was to deliver the alert in secrecy, but I can assure you that on college campuses and at schools throughout the land, teachers and administrators are now shouting "The students are coming!"
 
This month's parenting article is about the one constant in the month of August, transitions. Sometimes we know they are coming, and at other times they catch us by surprise, but whichever the case, August is often a month that presents parenting challenges around significant changes that are occuring with the arrival of a new school year.
 
So if they haven't quite yet arrived in your family....
"The transitions are coming!"
"The transitions are coming!"
Parenting through Transitions
   
I often think of August as the month where you struggle to both stay still and move forward; in one breath holding on to the long days of summer and in another breath anticipating the parenting responsibilities of the coming year.  August is a month abundant with family transitions -- children heading to college, a child or two back from summer camp, preparations for coordinating parenting responsibilities, changed people and people changing.
 
Read the complete article
In This Issue
Parenting through Transitions
Communication Central
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KAY'S NEWS
I have my own transition this month.
 
I resigned from my Associate Director role at Wheaton College to focus on Successful College Parenting.
 
I look forward to fully applying my 22 years of experience toward:
 
 - coaching parents as they navigate the pre-college and college years with their children;
 
 - contributing my expertise to schools committed to 
cultivating parent relations through educational programs, expanded resources and guidance;
 
 - providing training to help faculty and administrators to effectively interact with concerned parents.
  
Communication Central
 
When communicating with our children we often forget that we can choose how quickly we respond or react to a particular behavior or attitude.
 
When they were young we may have followed the "Count to 10 seconds first" strategy, but as our children have gotten older we have likely lessened the 10 second buffer to address nearly everything in the moment. Count to 10 -- it's longer than you think. What if you were to respond in 10 minutes or even in some situations in 10 hours? Time gives us a chance to gather our thoughts and to pull out the key points that we desire to share.  It is hard to hear the wisdom in the words if it is clouded by anger. Make it a choice, your choice, when to respond and react. It is true that some situations require immediate attention, and it is also true that when we have the opportunity to formulate our thoughts what we share is better heard.
Did you know... 
 
The Second Annual National Survey on the Current College Parent Experience reported that the topics about which students most requested advice or assistance from their parents were: academics, career planning, and finances.
 
This same survey reported that the topics about which parents were most concerned were: finances, personal health and safety, and academics.
 
No surprise that finances are a pretty significant issue. In fact Sallie Mae released a report in April that found the average undergraduate had over $3,000 in credit card debt.

Take time now to anticipate what your child needs to learn or know in advance of the school year. Then find actual opportunities for your child to gain knowledge and apply their emerging skills. There is nothing worse than having to pick up the pieces from something that could have been taught or shared in advance.
 
Enjoy this month's newsletter and please feel free to e-mail me with topics you'd like to learn more about. SuccessfulCollegeParenting.com is your resource for enhancing your child's college experience. Visit the website to read this month's article and access our archive.
 
Sincerely,
 
Kay Kimball Gruder, M.Ed., C.P.C.
SuccessfulCollegeParenting.com