Here it comes, that dreaded holiday, Valentine's Day. You know what I'm talking about: when the stupid bouquets roll in all day long, for everyone at work, but NEVER for me. (Well, maybe once, in 1983. Then I got the bill.) Some women get flower-minded partners. Then there are the rest of us. It's to the point at work, when the bouquets are delivered, I just put the vase on the elevator floor, press 2, and let it take its own self upstairs. Ha. Don't get me wrong, I've got a great hubby. We've been married 33 years, 10.5 months, and a week. He can cook, clean, or do anything. Except flowers. He calls Valentine's Day, "An FTD scam". I did the math: 33 anniversaries + 3 years we dated = 36 bad Valentine's Days! Wow. Since I am supposed to be an expert in offering stress management tools, I decided to take control of the matter. How? I now buy my own flowers. A rose is $4.99 (pre-tax) at the grocery, (greenery, baby's breath, and ribbon included) I wrote out a card: "And you thought I forgot!" I smugly entered work with my flowers. Everybody knew I'd bought them and many think I'm a big loser. Big deal. The rest of them think I'm brilliant. Even my mother-in-law thought it was rather clever, because she knows her son. A few weeks later, I bought flowers again, this time, for our anniversary. Suprisingly, a big bouquet arrived for me later that day. I mean HUGE. And gorgeous. Naturally, everyone assumed they were to me, from me, due to the the telltale card:(Yep, you guessed it!) "And you thought I forgot!" I was starry-eyed over the thought that my old dog, had learned a new trick! After work, I thanked him for the flowers. "What flowers?" Jeff said. Me: "You know...the FLOWERS! Our anniversary. Duh."
Jeff: "You know I don't send flowers."
Our kids asked, "Dad, you didn't get Mom ANYTHING?"
"You didn't tell them what I bought you at Victoria Secret, did you?" Jeff said, confidently.
Me: "It was pretty, and very sweet, but at work, you can't put a THONG on the desk!" If he hadn't sent flowers, who had? Eventually, I found out the flowers had come from my mother-in-law! She was quite proud to have pulled off this surprise. I thought it was great! I was also quite proud of myself for having resolved something which was a source of stress, by buying my own flowers, as needed. You're thinking that pretty flowers are pretty petty, and I'll give you that right. My point is this: apply this concept to an issue in your own world. By taking matters into my hands, I resolved the issue, for five bucks. (Note: it doesn't have to be costly.) I finally let go of my expectations of my husband and flowers. Another bonus. I realized it didn't matter how I got the flowers. I just wanted flowers. And for the record, I have just returned from the store with my $4.99 rose for Valentine's Day, which is tomorrow. I figured this will save an errand in the morning and allow me to focus my energy on other issues. One thing is for sure, it puts a new spin on the term, "flower power". What are the flowers of stress in your world?
Laugh! Learn! Let it go!
Happy Heart Day!