Much of my coaching work focuses on helping people turn a struggle with addiction or an addicted loved one into a platform for spiritual growth and healing. As the number of things it is possible to become addicted to grows - alcohol, drugs, food, shopping, control, internet porn, gambling, television, video games - so does the suffering in families and in our world. It's no accident that so many people are approaching their "bottom" just as so much appears to be going wrong on the planet.

There is a truth here for all of us: The the way up is often down first. Those who have found true prosperity and peace have usually endured some pretty hard knocks, such as surviving poverty, addiction, abuse, or abandonment. Likewise, every time of social or economic growth has followed a time of hardship for many.

We can shorten our stay in any valley by accepting what is happening to us. That doesn't mean we lie down and give up. Instead, we need to heed the advice of Wayne Dyer, "Do what you ought and trust what may be." In my classes and coaching, we always build on the premise that things don't happen to us; they happen for us. This makes it very easy to move from a victim mentality of resentment and blame into a place of power and action as we seek the blessings and lessons in every event. When we expect to find these "blessons" we always do.

With the right attitude, every loss can become space for something new. Every disappointment can be examined for truth: Is the dashed expectation based on reality, or on an illusion you created ... and then believed? Every missed opportunity can turn into an intention to act on guidance faster next time. Every act of grace can remind us to be grateful.

Whether you feel blessed or cursed, the choice is always yours.