| Missionaries to the Family |
|
Would you consider supporting Peace in the Home with a modest monthly donation of $10, $25 or $50? Peace in the Home relies on people who concur with our mission and values to help support us financially in order to remain effective and viable. As a 501(c)(3) non-profit charitable organization, your gifts are tax-deductable. Please let us know how we can accomodate your giving preferences. |
Green Marriage
|
Watch for our new relationship series, "Green Marriage -- Good for
creation & creatures". One of the best things you can do for the
environment may have nothing to do with trees, rivers or car exhaust. For more
info, or to host an event, call 804-378-2249 or email info@peaceinthehome.org
|
|
Thank you!
|
Heartfelt thanks to all of our Richmond area friends who donated their Ukrop's Golden Gift points to Peace in the Home. By simply shopping for food, you have helped to strengthen marriages and equip parents. Thank you!!!
|
| Join Our List |
If this Peace in the Home update was forwarded to you, please join our list to receive family ministry news and event info. | |
|
Greetings!
We're shifting gears for this update from marriage to parenting, with a short piece on the moral safety of our children. We've been thinking a lot lately about how our society does so much for the physical safety of children, but how little is being done to contribute to moral safety. We hope a few moms and dads will find some encouragement here to continue to fight for the hearts and minds of your precious children, during a time in our history when that isn't an easy battle. Blessings on your home!
Love,
Robert & Melissa
|
Protecting our Children
|
|
Blessed are the ones hungering and thirsting
for righteousness,
for they will be satisfied.
(Matthew 5:6)
I received one of those unsolicited emails from a friend a few years ago, posing the question: "How did we ever make it?" How did we ever make it growing up as children in an age without child car seats, bike helmets or cell phones, while bouncing around in the back of pick-ups?
Most parents today wouldn't even consider leaving a child in a car for a moment while dashing into a store for some milk. But many of us wouldn't think twice about plopping a young one unsupervised in front of a television screen, or letting a pre-teen loose on the internet for an hour or two while we busied ourselves with something else.
As a dad, I'm less concerned about the physical safety of my children than I am about their moral safety. That doesn't mean I'm a careless father, or that I want to see Rachel, Andrew or Leah hurt. With helmets and side impact air bags and spf 50 and nice neighbours, there's a pretty good safety net out there.
But, I am concerned everyday with the downward spiral of morality in our society, and the challenge it poses to fathers and mothers who just want to grow children of character in this overwhelmingly dominant culture.
"Moral safety" is guarding the hearts and minds of the precious gifts with whom we've been entrusted, from harmful influences that conflict with parental values in the home. This is particularly important during the formative years when values are most effectively instilled, and moral development kicks in.
Television, the internet, lyrics, friends, store displays, billboards, print media (and now even schools) are delivering messages intended to shape the hearts of minds of our young ones. Not every voice is at odds with the values of the home, but many of them are, and some of them can be a challenge for parents to compete with. But we must.
"Why is it that institutions of all kinds regularly drift from the right to the left? From orthodoxy to heterodoxy? From faithfulness to unfaithness? From discipline to permissiveness?" ~Joel Belz
Our family doesn't watch a lot of television, but we really like to gather for major events like tennis grand slams. This year, we finally awoke to the fact that while we're free to choose our programming, we have no control whatsoever over the moral content of the advertising. During the U.S. Open, our young children were exposed to unnecessary and extreme violence, sexually-provocative images and advertising for products that might fit better when young children are in bed.
As a father, I am also concerned about the "state of the family" -- the climate into which our children will find their wings. Stats on premarital sex, unwed births, abortions, adultery, cohabitation and divorce are all going in the wrong direction!
If we're just drifting with the cultural currrent, values and behaviours to which we're increasingly exposed tend to normalize those behaviours over time, and desensitize us to their rightness or wrongness. Sexual promiscuity and homosexuality are two good examples of that. As parents, we need to scream out "No!", and opt out of the normalization/desensitization program, while we work harder to get our own homes in order, preparing our kids for healthy relationships.
So, what can I do to protect my children in such a climate?
The best thing you can do is to build a closer relationship with each of your kids. Watch who toddlers run to when they have a "boo-boo". That's who they trust. Watch who teenagers run to when they have to confide in someone. That needs to be mom and dad. If they're not running to us, then we need to build the trust and deepen the relationship.
A second thing we can do is to define the values and set the boundaries for the home. A seminary professor of mine likened good relationship boundaries to the function of a healthy cell. In biology, a healthy cell has a semi-permeable membrane which allows nutrients to enter, waste to exit, and toxins to be rejected. To my mind, that's a pretty good model for the family!
Modelling values, teaching values, finding mentors, praying for your children, and helping them to recognize good friends are ways of delivering nutrients. Providing age-appropriate freedom to fail while learning from mistakes is a way of allowing waste to exit. Maintaining age-appropriate parental control on what comes through the front door, through the ear buds, and especially through the video screens of the home are some ways of rejecting harmful toxins.
Helping our children to be morally-safe also means building their moral intelligence. Moral intelligence doesn't mean encouraging young minds to be tolerant of any belief, opinion, social trend or behaviour. That wouldn't be helpful, as some things are inherently wrong, and many behaviours demand responses other than affirmation or tolerance. Moral intelligence means recognizing wrong from right, and feeling confident in making good choices, regardless of what others may be doing.
In stark contrast to our culture, scripture devotes little space to the value of physical safety, but it seems to put significant emphasis on moral and spiritual development, frequently linking the two. God's word frequently links idolatry and sexual immorality. Right thinking and acting (for the right reasons), even at the expense of personal comfort, seems to be important to God.
Parting thoughts ...
If you still have children or teens at home:
1. Think about deepening your relationship with each child. Relationship is critical to moral development. Whose information is having the greatest influence on your children? Whose information do they respect the most? Whose stories are they yearning to hear? If it's not you, then think about some creative ways you might begin to change that.
2. Think about praying for God's protection. For your children, and for all of the children in your neighbourhood. Moral and spiritual battles cannot be fought alone.
3. Think about becoming real. Talk about the values represented in movies or shows the family watches together. Use the opportunity to teach, for example, how genuine love differs from Disney love, why lying to parents is never right, or why humility is better than pride.
4. Think about impacting your world in November. There will always be an economy, but depending on who we elect, there may not always be morality.
Please continue to share your stories with us.
rgp
|
|
|
|
|
