By Susie Molek, MSCP, LPC, ICCE

     In the infamous quest for meaning, I am enlightened in my therapeutic work to the answer of one of life's greatest mysteries in need of infinite reflection; that, as I sit across from another human being, listening, responding, sometimes giving gentle psychological nudges forward, I have become a student. A student continually learning the individuality of meaning and in consequential return, I reflect on yet another significance to my own life.

     So, yes, we graduate; we become counselors, therapists, psychologists. Yet, we forget at times that in our field, we will forever be students and having the right answer in the exam of life, means learning and growing through our relations with others before their healing, and possibly yours, can begin.

     One of the world's greatest miracles is that of creation itself; the magic and mysticism of birth. Suspended in the womb, we spend the beginning of our life connected and embodied. We emerge, still connected, still nurtured from another life, anticipatory of an existence with others. We are surrounded by others. I can't stress enough the importance of this connection in our therapeutic work. I have heard patients who have come from other places feeling unheard or misunderstood. I was the young, na�ve therapist years ago who talked too much, didn't talk enough, and had no idea what balance was or how to achieve it. Then I began to grow and observe my surroundings. It was when I decided to be a student again and not as a therapist, that patients responded and began to heal through their own discoveries.

     I started to watch colleagues go through burn-out. I have read many articles on stress relief. I have assessed a great need for "meaningful" counseling. How is it that in a world of others, we find so much disconnect? It seems that when we stray from doing our work with God as our guidance and core, we tend to slide into doing too much - neglecting self-care of our temple. We sometimes take on a negative view of our work and that never results in effective healing for our patients as we are connected not just through discourse but through all the senses God has blessed us with, including intuition.

     One of my favorite scriptures assists me in maintaining a newness and a genuine aspect to therapy that keeps me fresh and always learning and growing. Galations 5:16-18 says, "My counsel is this: Live freely, animated and motivated by God's Spirit. Then you won't feed the compulsions of selfishness." My framework in therapy is just this - to live and work through God's guidance and assistance and always see God in our clients. We work through Him to serve others who have Him at their essence. For me, I contend that maintaining a curiosity about people and their lives keeps me connected to the person and maintains my interest for the session next week and the week after. Without curiosity, how can we truly be of assistance. Even when we work with family systems, whether this intimidates you or fascinates you, I believe a person must first get to know the nature of the beast in order to understand the organism itself in relation to an amalgamation of entities. To comprehend the system, from which is derived a configuration of convergences and divergences, one must observe the rituals. We must be inquisitive and discover patterns and be, as stated earlier, a student, before we become a helper.

   I always say that things don't happen because of you; things happen because of something greater than you. Being reminded of this, I believe, will keep us humble in our work and possibly happier. We are not above others, whether working with an individual, family, or couples - we are curious scholars of all God's creatures living freely, animated by the Holy Spirit.

__________ _ _ _ __________