Let's look at a fundamental part of conscious relating that
has nothing directly to do with another person, yet has everything to do with
the quality of our connection. It has
everything to do with how we relate to ourselves. In order to consciously relate to another, we must first
relate consciously to ourselves.
In other words, we must care for ourselves first.
We must care for ourselves first
I must admit up front that this aspect of conscious relating
has not come easily to me. As a
matter of fact, I have to continuously stay conscious of how well I am taking
care of myself. For those of you who
put you at the bottom of the priority list and think of self-care as a foreign
idea... it's ok. I sympathize with
you and I can also say how incredibly important it is. My whole experience of life changes when
I take care of myself! I'm
happier, kinder, more inspired and more abundant!
Many of us are committed to making a difference in the world
or we know others are depending on us. As a result, we choose to prioritize others before ourselves. Others might show up in the form of our
families, companies, friends or community projects - any person or activity
that we put our focus on and give our energy too. Yet, if we do not care for ourselves we cannot truly
care for others.
It took me years to see the truth of this. I told myself that
taking care of me or even saying that I needed anything was selfish, needy,
weak and a whole host of other disempowering things I used to tell myself. I'd grown up responsible and decided I
could do anything and didn't need anyone.
After years of serving the corporate business
world I was exhausted and pretty unhappy. I had no idea how to really take care of myself. I had no idea what I needed. I would
ask myself and have no idea. If
someone asked me what I needed, I would say "nothing." I was in self-denial and I was
exhausted and
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