Article: Self-Awareness 
Let's continue our look at Conscious
Relating... last week I described Conscious Relating as having four main
characteristics: self-awareness, other-awareness (in other words...seeing and listening),
taking responsibility, and authentic communication.
Let's dive into the foundation of Conscious Relating: Self-Awareness. If we want
to consciously relate with another, first we have to know ourselves - what we
are feeling, needing, wanting, desiring. Our desire may be to simply hear how another person is doing or it may
be that we have an urgent need to communicate or anywhere in between.
Over the years of studying
relationships and myself, I've been shocked at times to realize that the
"actual" motivation behind my communication was something very different than
what I "thought" it was. I've
noticed that there are times when I believe that I am communicating with the
intention of helping or supporting another person, and when I've looked deeper,
I've found a more selfish motivation. I'm almost embarrassed to share this and I know from speaking and
working with many others, that I am not alone. I've done much work to really know and express myself
honestly and sometimes I still catch myself.
There are several ways in which
we can be unconscious in our communication when we are not fully aware of
ourselves. Let's look at a couple
of those ways and then we'll look at some ways to be more deeply self-aware and
more conscious in our relating.
First, I've recognized in myself
that sometimes I help others because I want them to like me, or approve of me,
or even do something in return for me. When I'm conscious that I have multiple motives Read More
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Other Stuff ... Weekly Practice... More
Weekly Practice: Magic Moments
We can express volumes of love in mere seconds!! Magic moments are another defining factor in the quality of your
relationship... We create magic moments when we slow down and truly
experience the connection of the moment. ... Let's start with two
regular every day occurences that you can turn into magic! Read more...
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