What we say to ourselves is obviously very powerful.  How to make the shift from negative to positive statements sounds simple and it is, but it is harder to accomplish, especially if we are dealing with an addiction.  Any time you want to change any habit, they say you must repeat the new behavior 21 times before it replaces that old habit.  In addition, the old habit or addictive behavior will tend to return in times of stress, such as when there are many outside factors distracting you, when you are tired or when you are sick.  Being aware of your vulnerability at these times can help prevent a slide back into bad scripts and help you rally support when it is most needed. 

Being kind to yourself by saying things like "Take your time, there's no rush" or  "It's ok if I need to delay doing this or making a decision" and "Keep with my plan of action that I developed earlier.  This situation will pass and so will the negative thoughts."  Think of what you might say to a friend in need of support and apply it to yourself.  Shifting your approach gives more energy to be applied to tasks at hand and helps develop positive coping skills in those situations where our past has led us to think in self-destructive ways. 

Changing ourselves is a life-long process and we can all use some help with it at times.  Remember that your EAP can be an objective source of support for you at any time. 

Visit Solutions EAP online or call 1-800-526-3485 for assistance for all life's challenges. It is free, confidential, and open to family members.