Life Dimensions
September 2009
The Relationship Resource
Teaching the Dynamics of Healthy Relationships
In This Issue
Giving It Your Best!
Book In Review
Blueprint for Success
Quick Links
Marriage Fitness
A Sunday school teacher began her lesson with a question. "Boys and girls, what do you know about God?"  The kindergartner's hand shot up in the air and he shouted, "He's an artist!"  "Really? How do you know?" asked the teacher.  "You know-Our Father, who does art in heaven..."
People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention.
How do you get holy water?  Cook the hell out of it!

Giving it our Best!

              Family Talking                   


When I hear people describe how they treat their loved ones at home, I am often dumbfounded.  Many times, a person will tell me about the amount of yelling in the home, name-calling, rudeness, and blatant disregard for another's thought and feelings. 
I reflect a moment and reflect back to that person, "Would you behave that way in your work setting?" The usual response is "Of course not!"  Then I conclude that the best of self is given to the public and the worst is allowed to come into the home. 
Why is that?  Why do we give the best to the outside world, to people who will come and go in our life and yet give the "worse" to the most important relationships we will ever have for most of our lives?  I offer that we have this backwards.  Our best should be reserved to those we love and see each and every day.   To say "please" and "thank you" to perfect strangers and not to our spouse or children seems absurd.  Yet, this occurs more often than one can imagine.  To be our best should not be limited to the public forum, but should be given its highest place in the home where it truly can have the most effect in the lives it would mean the most.   

Book In Review  
 what smart couples know   
A colleague of mine in the Colorado Association of Marriage & Family Therapists (CAMFT) has recently written a book entitled, What Smart Couples Know: The Secret to a Happy Relationship by Patricia Covalt,  Ph.D.  Her book offers practical guidance for relationship success which is dependent on not only what you do, but who you are. 


Successful relationships require more than just skills that therapy and self-help resources can provide.  They require emotional intelligence (EQ) which means having the capacity to understand your own emotions and the emotions of others and to use reason in handling emotional information. 


Covalt takes from Daniel Goleman's best seller, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ  (1997), widely used in business and industry and applies it to close personal relationships.  If both people use EQ as a couple, they'll see definite results. 


If one is single, this book will give hope for a successful future relationship! 
While we may not be able to control all that happens to us, we can control what happens inside us."
                                                 -Benjamin Franklin

Blueprint  for Success 
Blue Print for SuccessMary Ann Van Buskirk is a  keynote speaker and author and has been selected from a nationwide search to be featured in Blueprint for Success, a highly successful book series from Tennessee based Insight Publishing. The book features best-selling authors Stephen R. Covey (Seven Habits of Highly Effective People) and Ken Blanchard (One Minute Manager.) Van Buskirk, Blanchard and Covey, are joined by other well-known authors and speakers, each offering time-tested strategies for success in frank and intimate interviews.
Mary Ann Van Buskirk, M.A., M.Div. is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Colorado, a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, a Fellow in the American Association of Pastoral Counselors and co-founder of Positive Coaching with over twenty years of experience as a counselor, trainer and national speaker.  People who have worked with her report vast improvements in their abilities to relate in healthier ways at home and at work.  Success is a result of healthy relationships.
Take $10 off our Seminar...
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Treat yourself to a day enhancing your understanding on how to improve your marriage relationship.
Seminar Date:  Saturday, October 10, 2009
Time:  9:00AM-12:00PM
Location:  4155 E. Jewell Avenue, Suite 1100
               Denver, CO 80222
Cost: $35.00 per couple/$20 per individual.
Take $10 off the original price by mentioning you heard about the seminar through The Relationship Resource newsletter.
Register by October 7, 2009 (Space is limited)! 
Facilitator:  Mary Ann Van Buskirk, M.A. M.Div, LPC, 20 years counseling couples.
To sign up, email
"Where you focus becomes your reality."


Mary Ann Van Buskirk
Life Dimensions
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Use this coupon to receive $10 off an in person seminar "Proven Ways to Improve your Marriage."  For more information contact us at
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